How To Check If Someone Is Invisible On Skype?

How do you tell someone who has a disability you like them as only a friend?

• Okay everyone, so I have this guy friend who i met online on this dating site...lame i know but whatever..so on the site he messages me first a friendly hello and all that, i replied and went to check out his profile. Turns out he is actually a 87% match according to the site, so im intrigued and start to read about him you know, nice guy, has morals, parties,plays soccer,about to graduate college, drives, he's a christian, etc. BUT He has cerebral palsy! Im blown away that this guy is awesome but has this diesese thats obviously not holding him back. We start chatting and it turns out we attend the same college and live actually close. So we made a meet up date at school just to say hi . Im waiting by the library for him, and i notice a guy walking towards me in a very bad posture, and had very bad slurred speech, when he said hello.. It was him alright...we chatted and he told me "I wasnt sure if you knew but I have cerebral palsy, im sorry if that shocking to you". I had told him I read everything on his profile, and knew who and what I was meeting. He was actually shocked that i read his profile at all and even took and interest. So After meeting him and everything...to be honest i was a little disappointed and re thought a lot of things..like i dont know if i want to date someone with a disability...or can I? I never heard anyone dating someone with a disability, maybe i never noticed idk...Does this make me a bad person that i would pass on this guy and look for someone else in my search idk.. But since out first meeting, he text's me allllllllll the time, and always wants to get on skype and stuff. already he's very needy. He told me that he really likes me, and wonders if I would like to date and start a relationship? I just said we should be friends for right now... He lives with his mom who obviously takes care of him and he admitted to being a momma boy. He told me about his past relationships and that the last one used him, for a place to stay cuz she was homeless...Others girls just cheated... He even told me that he lost his virginity at 17 and all that which was a bit personal but okay... I do like him, but as a friend...i dont want to date him out of guilt and just pretend that i really like him, thats wrong and disrespectful to do to any person. I asked my girlfriends for advise but they all said "who wants to date a retard'?...some friends right? I really dont know what to do in this situation...he really is sweet and hilarious at times like a normal GUY...He even leaves me goodnight and goodmorning text everyday, its adorable... Again I dont want to date someone out of pity...he deserves better If you dont know what cerebral palsy is...look it up, its a well known disorder and its good to know and learn about... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cerebral_palsy

• Answer:

  First of all, no you are not self centered, in fact you sound very understanding, genuine and kind, it is not us who controls as to what we feel to others, if we like them, we like them, if we don't, we don't. simple as that. I think its very kind of you to look past his physical disabilities and see him for who he really is, You've already answered your own question, you are right, you should be fair to him and only tell him the truth that you like him only as a friend, not because of his disability but because he is not your type. I also think the reason why he is so clingy is because not many people or women were fair to him in the past, and already with this insecurity, even if you did return his feelings, the relationship would still be unhealthy. Just be his friend and encourage him through life, if he cannot accept this its obvious he does not care enough about your feelings, but reading this, I have a small idea, that maybe he will understand and is probably thrilled that he has a great trust worthy friend. :) Bless you <3