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My child is going to be tested for autism. What's next?

Does My Child Have Autism and If So How Is His Life Going To Be In The Future?

  • hi all, i am a worried mom to a 22 month old. my son hasn't said a word till now. not even mum dad... we have had him under evaluation for last 4 months. his hearing was tested and found to be normal. the doctor on our first visit had said he is mildly autistic.(because of his various autistic characteristics like not talking.. not pointing.. not looking at things i point at.. constantly touching my eye for comfort, very little eye contact.. not responding to his name many times... high threshold to pain no much understanding of language constantly turning the wheels on all the cars living almost in his own world now two months later.. he has still no words still doestn point rarely looks at things i point to some language recognition but still not enough still plays with wheels still touches my eye like and obsession but he has cme ut of his shell and loves playing with me and his sister is very affectionate if gets hurts wants to be comforted by me still plays with wheels but not confined to that..loves playing with the entire car..zooms it around the house if he wants something will take me to it by pulling me and will put my hand on it instead of his own. loves to hear nursery rhymes and recognizes many rhymes and copies their action. eye contact is totally normal now..except with strangers where he seems slightly shy..but becomes friendly soon. responds to name more..but not always so basically he is showing mixed signs..which is why even his development ped is on the fence abt the diagnosis. in such a situation , like any mohter, i have gone thro a series of emotions from shock to denial to heartbroken to frustrated and helpless. now i am finally trying to accept the fact that this could be the reality of my life. i am not a judgemental person and in no way to i love my son any less because of this..but like i said initially ..im a worried mom. im not worries abt today or tomorrow or many years to come.. when i am there to tk care of him in any way he needs but of the future when a day might come if im not there to tk care of him. i ask all of u.. if any are in my situation ... what do u think abt my son's condition. does he seem autistic. if so then how severe. and also would like to know in future will he ever be (no..not normal... i never use that term for children) but self sufficient.. independent .. will he be able to take care of himself.. live life without help of others. i hope u understand what i am asdking. would really appreciate any genuine advice or opinion. pls dont be rude or harsh as its hurtful and why hurt someone who is already hurting!

  • Answer:

    I feel your pain. At a very young age, my son was diagnosed with developmental delay and suspiction of aututism. I was angry and devastated as no one ones that type of sentence on your precious little child. My sos did not talk until he was two and when he did it was intelligible speech. We had teraphiots come to our home for speech theraphy, occupational theraphy, physical therapy. At 3 he went to developmental preschool so he would learn how to interact with other children. he did everything that you described, except with the spinning of the wheels. Spinning of the wheels and the obsession with spinning is a hard marker for autitism; so that mean that your son probably is autistic. I wanted to let you know that there are several shades of autism, from mild to severe and that no one can diagnose him for sure until later in life. Is your child potty trained? What I can tell you is that with efforst from your part and teh ealy Intervention teams (Child find) available free of charge through your state, he can improve and get better. Providing the right stimulation for yoru child and finding the way for him to learn is key. I commend you for getting him evaluated. It will take a very long time and it is an ongoing process... my son is 11 now and almost in middle school and we are still going through the process. I will tell you about the future. At the beginning (age 2) I though his life was ruined and so was mine. With theraphy he began speaking and he slowly he adquire social skills as well. Kids did not like him much because he did not know how to play with others and took toys from other children. He was a loner and that killed my soul. At the age of 3 he attended developmental pre-school and that helped him a lot to be around other kids, in a small controlled group with caring and loving teachers. Strict routines helped him a big deal. He did not need to go to the special ed class. By 5, he was prepared for the challenges of kindergarden and he attended the regular classroom with the other kids. It was difficult to have so much stimulation and so many kids. He has an aide in the classroom and went to special ed math and reading. The other subjects he took in the regular classroom. He was fitted with glasses and that helped him a LOT. He was a godo student and had dificulty grasping new concepts. His speech was way behind his peers. He was dianosed with speech delay and Pervasive Developmental Disorder Not otherwise specified (PDD-NOS which is teh mildes of autism sprectrums) Now he is 11, he is no longer considered to be "autistic" as they could never dianoed him. He has friends and lots of them. He is a good student that required a little help with his organizational skills. He is a nromal child and has blossommed throught the years after a very rocky start. He still goes to speech theraphy to help him with gramar and reading comprehension but he attends the regulat classroom 100%. He will be going to middle school this upcoming school year. There is help and there is hope. Everyone told me that my son was autistic when he was young, but all the specialists never could diagnosed him. He was later diagnosed with ADHD instead as he has never met the criteria for any of teh autism disorders. There is hard work but the rewards are wonderful. There is a show on TLC about a family that has 6 autistic children. It's very informative. There are many online support groups and that saved my sanity years ago. Good luck dear, if you want to email me, feel free.

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You should read that book by Jennie McCarthy. I saw her on TV and her son has autism and she has done a lot of research on autism. She has found some things you can do too that actually helped her son get better. It's definitely worth looking in to.

Liz

I can only begin to understand how hard this situation is and what kind of emotional roller coaster you must be on. While I'm not a doctor, yes, from what you've described with your son, I'd say he is autistic or falls somewhere on the autistic spectrum. However, I truly believe that your vigilance and getting him early help/intervention will make all the difference in the world. I also believe he'll be able to lead a self-sufficient life. I, too, don't care much for the word 'normal.' Mainly because I know "normal" people who are more social-inept than anyone I've ever known. I wish you luck.

shadowtalker1

I don't know a vast about about autism. But I did work with some autistic children while I was a Special Ed. Assistant in a middle school for 5 years. But I will try to help. I don't think anyone has an answer for you. But the spectrum of autism is huge. Some children are greatly disabled from it for all their lives. Others that have lesser degrees of it can learn to cope and deal with it rather well. There are probably adults that you know today that had they grown up in today's world would have be diagnosed with some form of autism. But you just would not know it when they are in their 20's and 30's. Those children before might have just been label "strange" or "emotionally disabled" or some other title that either there peers or teachers slapped on them. But until the last 10 years or so we didn't know that much about autism, so even include those children. And we can help all children so much better than before. And programs are getting better and better. So I think you can have a lot of hope. Hope that your child can have a happy life. Just as a mother try to be educated as much as you can about your child. And be his advocate. It will work out fine. Your child is already much better off than many kids. He has you as a mother, and he emotionally engages with his family. This is really a big deal. So celebrate his achievements. I know it is hard to hear this from a doctor. But you do have reason to hope.

Starsfan14

Have you taken your son to a developmental pediatrician or a child psychiatrist? They are often good at diagnosing autism spectrum disorders. Your son doesn't seem like a classic case of autism; however, he may have an autism spectrum disorder (there are many to varying degrees). My son was diagnosed with PDD-NOS at the age of 6 (we put off testing for way too long). He will be 8 in a few weeks. There is a good chance that your son will be self-sufficient and independent -- he may need extra help learning certain skills though. And, it may still be too early for the doctor's to pinpoint a certain diagnosis (or the diagnosis may change in the future). My advice is read all that you can and if you feel that something isn't right with your child seek different medical advice. There are wonderful textbooks about various autism spectrum disorders that give a lot of ideas for therapy sessions, learning social skills, learning self-help skills, etc. Good luck!

spalmer

So most of what you described I saw in both my boys, like the way he played with toys and not pointing. He's doing all the things he should be now except talking, that's a very very good sign! He may or may not be autistic, you are just going to have to wait and see - it may be his is on the low end of autism, (Asperger's Syndrome), which is often very high functioning that other then being a little off they do just fine.

Ethel

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