Find solution
Can a step parent ever get custody of me?

How to be a good step-parent?

  • I live with a wonderful 8 yr old. She's so smart, very charming and creative... but im the step parent. I haven't been there her entire life andher we used to only have her on the weekends. Recentlyy, her dad just won full custody, so now we have her 24/7. Her mom is not a huge part of her life because of useless addition... and now that we have her, I have no FLIPPING IDEA what im doing. I feel a combination of overbearing mommy and liberal friend. All three of us, (Dad, Kid, Me)have had horrible childhoods filled with a plethora of different abuse... and im worried that I don't know how to handle the boundry testing and lack of parenting this kid has had, during the week of course. Im worried she's going to push me around and not respect me as an adult if I let her get away with too much and im worried she's going to think im the evil stepmonster if I act like an adult with her... and believe me, she needs a LOTTTTTTTT of guidance. Tips?

  • Answer:

    Set certain expectations for her, then remain consistent about the way you help her meet those expectations. Consistency is the key here. It can be one of the hardest things to maintain, too, especially when she does things that anger you. Never punish out of anger. Try not to yell. Think about the things that you want to happen in your lives, and sit down with her and talk so you can come to agreements about how to reach your goals. Help her with hers, and ask for her help with yours. She's old enough to write her own goals. Good luck to all of you.

potatost... at Yahoo! Answers Visit the source

Was this solution helpful to you?

Other answers

Dont be mean to her dad or say anything negative about her mom. Just let her dad do most of the consequences and parenting untill you are to the point were you feel like her mom. I have had both of my parents divorce and re marry, and it kinda ticked me off sometimes when the step parent made me do things or punished me. So just let her dad do it, and dont take all her dads time away from her, and maybe have conversations with her. Hope I helped.

Montana Mott

Be yurself not much work to do with kidz, but just be nice and attentive to them. Lonq az they like yu then everythinq iz qood. But the most important thinq iz to not act like yu are her mother. She knowz who her real mother iz so if yu waz to start actinq like it she miqht think yur tryinq to take her motherz place. But other then that everythinq else iz not to worry. Just be there for her n let her know yu love her

Shanii

don't be too strict with her right now, because she may be missing her mom, and if she has anger she needs to get out, you don't want to be the one she takes it out on. just try to be her friend, and try to build a stronger relationship with her and get to know her. then you can start acting more like a parent and she'll be more likely to listen to you. you can still be responsible without being an "evil step-mother". just act the way you would want her to act, bcuz kids will usually copy how the adults they know behave.

anonymous

Related Q & A:

Just Added Q & A:

Find solution

For every problem there is a solution! Proved by Solucija.

  • Got an issue and looking for advice?

  • Ask Solucija to search every corner of the Web for help.

  • Get workable solutions and helpful tips in a moment.

Just ask Solucija about an issue you face and immediately get a list of ready solutions, answers and tips from other Internet users. We always provide the most suitable and complete answer to your question at the top, along with a few good alternatives below.