How to save on contact solution?

Should i contact (email / call) my fiance if he has stopped communicating with me?

• We have been engaged for 4 months now, prior to that we were in a relationship for about 6 months. We have also been friends for the past whole decade! We share a history, our friendship evolved into love last June and since then we became very close. We got engaged in October. The problems started after the engagement. he was very warm, loving, romantic and totally into me when we were going out. As soon as things became official and the families got involved, he started becoming somewhat distant. I know he still loves me but we have had a roller coaster ride these past 4 months with lots of arguments over the phone. We have NEVER fought in person. We both have a calming effect on each other when we meet so we decided to cut down on the number of phone calls. The wedding would have taken place in the last quarter of the year. During all this time, the problems usually arose from little bickerings, nothing serious. he is temperamental and even though he used to be extremely patient before the engagement, he started becoming intolerant. I would get hurt and often talk of breaking up but he never wanted to let me go and would always make it up to me through sweet gestures, notes, flowers etc The important thing is through all the ups and downs, he kept saying he would never leave me half way because he loved me and cared for me! His mother had her apprehensions from the start and did not even keep in touch for the most part even though my mum would call her sometimes. In our part of the world, a marriage is not only between two individuals but both families unite. His father was very happy and would call and ask to meet but his mother would always postpone plans due to weird reasons.. the sad truth is he is very close to his mother, being the only son and everytime he faces an issue, he consults his mom. I guess that point came where his mother took over. We had a stupid argument over the phone last week, even though things were otherwise normal. She kept checking on him through out the night and then the line got cut on a bad note (he actually hung up), he has no control over that sometimes. Even though he is a genuinely caring and loving man. Anyways i decided to let him be for a while, to my pleasant surprise he visited my office the next day since he knew i would be on my own, my partner was on leave and i have evening work hrs (i run my own institute). After that he left, came again the second day and this time decided to drop me home. Throughout these two days, he wasn't texting me or calling. So i tried to break the ice when he was dropping me home.. he said he couldnt stay longer as his parents needed the car so we could meet the next day, his mom called in the middle. Despite that we sat in his car outside my house for a good half an hour or more.. i told him honestly that if we are having issues, we can talk about them and figure out a mutual solution; if not, then we can part on an amicable note, before we involve our parents. He said he needed some time to think and he had tears in his eyes.. he was crying and told me that no matter what happens, i wont take this ring back. I designed it myself for hours with a lot of love for you! I told him not to worry and kissed him on the cheek and said we will meet tomorow and everything will be okay. The next day he said he couldn't make it and we spoke on the phone for 3 hrs. He said he would be the kind of husband who wouldn't want arguments or retaliations to anything he said, that he saw himself as a head of the family, sort of like a patriarch to which i said that there should be mutual respect and a wife has the right to question or protest sometimes because people do have different perspectives. The call ended there and he promised to meet me the next day! The next day came and he didnt call. i waited till evening. When i tried calling him later, he didn't take my calls. He just sent out one text saying, "he was out of town and couldn't talk" I got so panicky that he didn't even inform me. i ended up calling his dad to ask who said he has left for a day but sensing my restlessness, he handed over the phone to this wife, which was the biggest blunder! She voiced all her concerns over the past few months and the bottom line that she didnt think we could make it because we argue all the time and her son gets disturbed and is not happy! They came over to our place a few days later (during which time both of us did not contact each other) and his mom told my parents that it was I who called and was unhappy with her son due to his anger issues. She put it on me saying we wont be happy after marriage so its better to end the engagement. My dad took over and didnt take it well. He said all the elders will sit together to decide. They left and since then there's been no contact, we still have the rings! Is it over or i can still save it? I love him and it hurts very much!

• Answer:

  I don't quite understand, why is so much emphasis being placed on the parents? It's not their right to decide who marries whom. If he loves you and wants to marry you he'll do it. If he keeps acting like this then there's no point, he's spineless. From reading it I thought you two were teenagers until I read that you both worked and that you own an institute. So I'm really lost as to why you're letting other people interfere with you, and why he needs permission to talk to you or stay with you while dropping you off home.