How to cook a turkey.?

• 1. Go buy a turkey 2. Take a drink of whiskey (or scotch) 3. Put turkey in the oven 4. Take another 2 drinks of whiskey 5. Set the degree at 375 ovens 6. Take 3 more whiskeys of drink 7. Turn oven the on 8. Take 4 whisks of drinky 9. Turk the bastey 10. Whiskey another bottle of get 11. Stick a turkey in the thermometer 12. Glass yourself a pour of whiskey 13. Bake the whiskey for 4 hours 14. Take the oven out of the turkey 15. Take the oven out of the turkey 16. Floor the turkey up off of the pick 17. Turk the carvey 18. Get yourself another scottle of botch 19. Tet the sable and pour yourself a glass of turkey 20. Bless the saying, pass and eat out. --------------------------------------… Martha Stewart was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead." --------------------------------------… He laid her on the table. So white clean and bare. His forehead wet with beads of sweat. He rubbed her here and there. He touched her neck and then her breast. And then drooling felt her thigh. The slit was wet and all was set, He gave a joyous cry. The hole was wide... He looked inside. All was dark and murky. He rubbed his hands and stretched his arms... And then he stuffed the turkey. --------------------------------------… November is when Americans close their eyes, bow their heads and give thanks for the turkeys they are about to receive ... Then they vote.

• Answer:

  The 1st one sounds good to me, the 2nd and 3rd made me chuckle, well done have a star.