Japanese bikes are fast and nimble, German bikes are reliable and durable, what are Harleys good for?

• Seriously, the japanese bikes have the hp and handling down, the german stuff is reliable and can go anywhere (their gs series is amazing and their K bikes now put out over 160 hp), KTM's have been winning the the Paris Dakar for years, Ducati's seem to be winning all the races these days, and even Triumph's sport bikes are getting tons of praise as of late. So if these bikes have all the racing, handling, maneuverability, reliabilty, off road capability niches filled, what niche does the Harley fill? I can carve canyons at high speed, drop a knee around the track, ride offroad to almost any destination on earth on all these bikes, but what can I do on a Harley? Obviously I mean other than do the "let's dress up like the village people and ride to the bar" thing - that's the obvious (and embarrassing) one and my apologies go out to any flag slathered hog riding retards (is that redundant?) that may take offense to this question.

• Answer:

  Harley Davidsons are the best way to convert gasoline into noise without the bothersome side effects of horsepower or performance. ;) But seriously, man. Personally, I own a chopper (an old Honda), a cruiser (also a Honda) and a sportbike (gotta love those Kawasaki's!). I've ridden on many bikes throughout the years, including Harleys, and can only come up with one real answer regarding your question: Harleys are good for posing on. Let's face it, the "bada$$ outlaw biker" bit went out in the 70's, and nowadays it's mostly businessmen and guys having a midlife crisis who try to "recapture" that image. But they're not really fooling anyone, because come Monday, they're back to work in their suit and tie. A tough biker? No. Someone PRETENDING to be a tough biker? You betcha. Harley fills a niche market, and nothing more. Most bike manufactureers use the advancements and technology from their races to further advance their streetbikes. But Harley started getting their teeth knocked out decades ago by the Brits and Japanese, who were getting faster and better performing with every race. When Harley realized it could no longer compete, they dropped out. They build cycles built on 60-year old technology, with only moderate advancements. The simple fact that a Japanese bike (with an engine half the size of a Harley's) can totally blow away the Harley in every category but weight is a testament to the continuing advancement utilized by other manufacturers. Watch the television and magazine ads. See how Harleys are portrayed? It's almost laughable that so many of their customers buy into the image thing without doing their homework. "But Harleys have a higher resale value!" they say. Wrong. Especially when you consider how much you have to keep putting into the Harley to keep it going. I've seen custom Harleys with upgraded engines and all the bells and whistles sell for a fraction of what the owner had put into it over the years. "But they last longer! Thirty years later, a Harley will still be on the road!" they say. Maybe so, but that's because it spent the past 25 years in a shop. Anyone remember the AMF Harleys? I didn't think so. "They're reliable!" they say. Not really, especially when you factor in excessive vibrations which loosen bolts (and cause things to fall off) and fluid leaks. Man, my old Honda chopper is 26 years old, still on the original engine (I've only had to replace the valves), and it's got a hair under 90,000 miles on it. And it's also ridden in all kinds of weather, including rain and yes, even snow. It's funny. When the temps are in the single digits, I never see any of those hardcore Harley bikers out anywhere. Harley also keeps their ship above the waterline by cross-merchandising. You've got the clothing line, the watches, the glasses, coffee mugs, carpets, Barbie doll toy sets, so on and so forth. If they didn't have this level of cross-merchandising, they would've sunk long ago. Why is that? Because, quite simply, their customer base is getting smaller, getting older, and dying off. And today's smart consumer would rather have a reliable, superior-performing vehicle which costs a fraction of the Harley's price tag. I'm neither pro-Japanese or pro-Harley, but having put time in the saddle aboard both kinds of bikes, I can honestly say the metric bikes are far better, and will certainly provide their owner with many miles and a lot of enjoyment throughout the years. And that's my two cents on that. Ride safe!