What do you call the glasses wore by near-sighted people?

Why do people from other states hate new jersey?

• Yes "BRO" I Live in New Jersey. I curse... a lot. I say "yo", and I say it often. I sure as hell don't pump my own gas. I know what real pizza tastes like, and I know that a bagel is much more than a ****** roll with a hole in the middle. I judge people by what exit they are off the parkway. I can navigate a circle - with attitude. All good nights must end at a diner - preferably with cheese fries or a cheese steak sub. And yes it's a sub, not a hoagie, a grinder, or worse, a hero, and I wash it down with soda, not pop. Two words...mother ******. I don’t go to the beach - I go down the shore. And boardwalk brawls are just a part of the atmosphere. Yes, I have a dawg, and I drink cawfee. I know that 65mph really means 80. When someone cuts me off, they get the horn AND the finger ...and expect it. Dunt you just love me??? Q: Isn't New Jersey just a dump for New York's trash? A: That's hard to say since New Jersey is the richest state per capita in the US (For years, we were second to Connecticut). New Jersey also spends more per student than any state in the Union on education. You're from Jersey when.. You've been seriously injured at Action Park. You know that the only people who call it "Joisey" are from New York (usually The Bronx) or Texas. You don't think of citrus when people mention "The Oranges." You know that it's called "Great Adventure," not "Six Flags." You've ordered a hard roll with butter for breakfast. You've known the way to Seaside Heights since you were seven. You've eaten at a diner, when you were stoned or drunk, at 3 am. \Whenever you park, there's a Camaro within three spots of you. You remember that the "Two Guys" were from Harrison. You know that the state isn't one big oil refinery. At least three people in your family still love Bruce Springsteen, and you know what town Jon Bon Jovi is from. You know what a "jug handle" is. You know that a WaWa is an AMAZING convenience store. You know that the state isn't all farmland. You know that there are no "beaches" in new Jersey - there's "The Shore," and you know that the road to the shore is "The Parkway" not "The Garden State Highway." You know that "Piney" isn't referring to a tree. Even your school cafeteria made good Italian subs, and, you call it a "sub" not a "submarine sandwich" or worse yet, a "hoagie" or a "hero." You remember the song from the Palisades Park commercials. You know how to properly negotiate a Circle. You knew that the last question had to do with driving. You know that "Acme" is an actual store, not just a Warner Bros creation. You know that this is the only "New..." state that doesn't require "New" to identify it(like, try ...Mexico, ...York, ...Hampshire (doesn't work, does it?). You know how to translate this conversation: "Jeet yet?" "No, Jew?" You only go to New York City for day trips, and you only call it "The City." You know that a "White Castle" is the name of BOTH a fast food chain AND a fast food sandwich. You consider a corned beef sandwich with lettuce and mayo a sacrilege. In the 80's you wore your hair REALLY high. You don't think "What exit" (do you live near?) is very funny. You know that the real first "strip shopping center" in the country is Route 22. You know that no respectable New Jersian goes to Princeton - that's for out-of-staters. The Jets-Giants game has started fights at your school or local bar. You live within 20 minutes of at least three different malls. You can see the Manhattan skyline from some part of your town. You've gotten on the wrong highway trying to get out of Willowbrook Mall. You've eaten a Boardwalk cheese steak with vinegar fries. You have a favorite Atlantic City casino. You live within 20 minutes of at least three different malls. You refer to all highways and interstates by their numbers. Every year you have at least one kid in your class named Tony. You know the location of every clip shown in the Sopranos opening credits. You know that people from North Jersey go to Seaside Heights, and people from Central Jersey go to Belmar and people from South Jersey go to Wildwood. You weren't raised in New Jersey -- you were raised in either North Jersey, Central Jersey or South Jersey. You don't consider Newark or Camden to actually be part of the state. You remember the stores Korvette's, Two Guys, Rickel's, Channel, Bamberger's and Orbach's. You also remember Palisades Amusement Park. You start planning for Memorial Day weekend in February. You've never pumped your own gas. You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from New Jersey.

• Answer:

  You know that Wawa is the greatest convenience store ever, but then don't acknowledge that even they know it's called a H O A G I E. Sorry, we invented it in Pennsylvania so we get to name it. Wawa and Acme both Pennsylvania companies.