Why is everyone constantly pressuring me to join the National Guard or Air Force when I don't want to go!?

It's hard to say from what you've posted here, but if your life plan is "I plan to buy a cheap car and live in a motel when I get some money", I can understand why people are suggesting a turn in the military for you - they are probably doing it because you come off as directionless and irresponsible. Military service generally cures both of those, giving you direction and more-or-less forcing you to be responsible. Military service is generally viewed with pride. People are proud of your sister, although the coo-ing will wear off once she heads off to basic training. If you don't have a realistic plan "I am going to study this, train in that, work toward a career doing this... etc." then you may appear like you need prodding to get your act together. You are going to have to look, with a critical eye, at your life and how you carry yourself. Do you give off an air of being shiftless or lazy? Do you give people the impression that your life plan is just to hang around and see what happens? Odds are pretty good that they're just looking out for you and will shut up when they see you've taken charge of your life, whatever the choices are that you make.

I think your mom is right..you'll be living in her basement at 30..doing chores for toaster strudels...that is your destiny my friend...embrace it "I plan to move out into my own appartment after I buy a very cheap car and get enough money to rent out a room at a motel or something"...WOW!..quite a lofty goal! I would suspect your sister is shooting quite a bit higher

Not joining: In and out of mom's house for years until you're lucky enough to get a decent paying job that has no requirements. Then you'll live in a paranoid state because, if you get laid off, you're not marketable at all. You already said that it will take you TWO YEARS to buy a cheap car and gather some rent money? That's bad business. Joining: Honorable discharge on your resume makes you very marketable, not to mention whatever tech training you'll get in the Air Force. You'll also get paid to go to college for free when you're out (I get paid over $1,000/month to go to school with tuition taken care of on top of it). You'll earn a solid paycheck with plenty of incentive pays and plenty of time to save. Oh, and the military is FUN- it's a job. In my SHORT four years of enlistment, I had been to England (2 yrs), California (1 yr), TX (6 mo), and Kuwait (6 mo.) The few high school friends I had that had managed to muster the courage to leave the STATE made a huge deal about it, it was really kind of sad. That's going to be you, bud, unless you do something about it. If you can swallow your fear and make it through the few short weeks of boot camp, your life will be forever rewarded. Your sister and your mother care about you, that's why they're telling you to join. The ONLY reason you don't want to join the Air Force is because you're SCARED. There's nothing wrong that that, I was scared too, but do you really want your fear to make this life decision for you? There is only one opportunity in your life to join the armed forces, and that time is now. I'm willing to bet that if you don't do it you will regret it. --- IF NOTHING ELSE --- Just look at it objectively. Forget for a moment that you're scared of it, and look at the facts. Look at the benefits. Read about the GI Bill. Even go outside the recruiter, talk to veterans that won't lie to you. You'll realize that the ONLY ONLY ONLY single reason you won't do it is because you're scared. 'Nuff said. @ Ray: Tanya is clearly not out of High School. When she is, and has to face the real world (i.e. living in that $350/month apartment downtown) she'll be singing a different tune. Hippie kids generally confuse laziness with "who I really am" as a justification for their inaction.

All you've done here is whine about getting "pressured." So you don't want to join the military. Fine. What ARE you doing to establish yourself in life? Are you in school? Getting an education or learning a trade? You need to help yourself. Buying a cheap car and getting a motel room is not a plan for success in life.

They probably keep pressuring you because they know that the military is a great way to set you up for success and they just want don't want to see you fail. To get them to stop show that you are doing something else to improve yourself. Moving out wouldn't really do it because that usually puts you in an even harder financial situation. If the military isn't your thing then maybe apply to go to college or a technical training school. Don't just put down their idea down though. Do some Research about the military because they really do have alot to offer (especially considering the current economy) The National Guard is not the only branch and they are definitely not all the same.

Your family has effed up expectations. Do what makes you happy in life. You won't be able to make them stop saying it if they're annoying enough to have already said it that many times. You aren't as precious as your little sister. Because you aren't doing something big and important in your life, to their expectations. That won't change. They should love you as you are. If they can't, you'll have to wait and let them give up on pretending you're someone you are not. Why would people at school mention it? Not everyone talks about the military all the time. Are you surrounding yourself with people from the military? My idea would be, if they mention it. SAY NOTHING. Don't talk. These people may be going on about it because you responded. If you stop responding, they only can say so much about it. And change the subject. If they say it again, ignore it. Don't say anything. If you do this every single time, they will give up on mentioning it. May be hard but I recommend this. It's not mean because it's already mean that no one will listen to you.

Unless you sister has a job lined up, or she's planning to go to college full time, she could also wind up not doing so well income wise, after Basic Training and AIT are over. The National Guard only pays about $200 a month. They do offer tuition assistance for college on top of that, which is probably what attracted your sister to their program. I'm in the National Guard, after doing six years on Active Duty. Nearly half our new guys (straight out of AIT) are unemployed and living at home. The other half are going to college full time and living in college dorms or a really cheap apartments with five or six roommates. Only a handful of the new guys have a full time job - and that's mainly because their families have businesses. Unemployment for 16 to 24 year olds is at an all time high. I'd counsel anyone without a very firm college plan or a family business to turn to, GO ACTIVE DUTY FIRST. Okay, enough of that rant. You don't need to join the military if you really don't want to, but you need to get a plan. Working retail is not a plan, unless you want to starve to death for ten years until you make Manager at some gas station. Pick out a good program at a local community college or trade school. Something that's bound to pay the rent, like mechanic, HVAC, pipefitting, lineman, etc. Or go the traditional four year degree route. Even if you change your mind half way through, you will at least have something to tell your pestering Mom and sister. Get statistics on the pay for your future vocation. Talk about the training. Talk about other guys you've met on the worksite and how well they're doing in life. The trick is to bug THEM as much as they are bugging you about the National Guard. They'll back off. ;)

That is your choice, tell them all as strongly as you can to STFU about it. From now on the second they start to bring it up, just cover your ears and walk away.

its your life. military IS NOT for everyone. if you dont want it, then you wont do well. anyway, you will figure something out. good luck