To what degree is a husband obligated to protect his wife emotionally?

It's a fine line, to be honest with you. In my opinion, it TOTALLY depends on the situation. For exmaple, I know you said no physical stuff but I did just want to comment that a man should always protect his wife from physical threats. From an emotional stand point, I think he shouldn't step in unless necessary. Your first example -- the homeless man -- there is no real reason to say or do anything in my opinion. If I were walking down the street with my husband and that happened, I'd honestly be a little disappointed if my husband stepped in, as *I* probably wouldn't even feel the need to say anything. The man is most likely sick, if he's not he's definitely down on his luck and probably prepared to lash out anyway. It's someone in passing, so why bother stepping up and saying or doing anything? I'd just assume walk by without casuing a scene. Your second exmaple -- things at work -- I feel it is NOT a husband's place in any way, shape, or form to do anything about his wife's work. I work from home, however I do have clients who come here; parents of children. I did have a father of one of the children I care for give me a hard time once when my husband wasn't home (no threats, and nothing physical or sexual just rude and mean.) When I told him about it, he said if it ever happened again while he was home he'd step in -- I asked him not to. I explained to my husband that this was my job, and if something went astray that I'd handle it. I did tell him the obvious exception was if things got out of hand. I obviously do not expect my husband to sit there while another man screams at me, swears loudly or threatens me -- at that point I'd expect him to step in and defend me if it were going way over the top. Your mother criticizing her housekeeping I again think you should stay out of it. It's funny because you KNOW how many issues I have with my inlaws, however something as minor as this I really think should be best left between wife and mother. If it were me, I'd expect to retort to her critique and that would be the end of it. When SHOULD a husband step in? If things get out of hand. If we're walking down the street and that same bum stands up and starts following me and yelling at me with harsh words/language, I'd expect my husband to step up then if he didn't back off when I said something. If that man at my work started laying into my in an unprofessional way and I was telling him to back off and he was't listening; I'd expect my husband to step in then. If his mother started getting over the top (as you know my mother in law has) I'd expect him to step in then. I'm all about defending myself and having my husband support me from the sidelines. The difference to me is if it is a big threat, or a huge issue then I fully do expect him to step up and defend me outright. Good question. Have a star!!

I only believe a man should run interference in the homeless guy situation and mother. I would never let ANYONE disrespect my wife in front of me period. As her husband, my mother will not address my wife disrespectfully, nor will I allow my wife to be disrespectful to my mother. My grandmother was disrespectful to my wife ONCE, and I eliminated that problem with EXTREME prejudice. I believe the reason that I feel the need to step in is because my is MY family, and everyone else is just incidental at that point when I say "I do".

It's not a husband's duty to protect his wife 'emotionally' but I can understand how some women would appreciate a man who stands up for her. If a homeless guy called me a name while I was with my husband, my husband would probably keep his mouth shut and let me do the talking. He knows I don't tolerate crap from people, especially strangers who have no right to be rude or disrespectful to me.

If someone yelled something rude at my wife and it was uncalled for I'd stand up for her, but I'd do that for anyone with me whether it was a friend or a family member or whoever, it's a good question though, I'm sure women can handle it themselves but I would feel rude if I just stood there and did nothing while someone yelled at my wife or someone else who matters to me, Seth.

As for the job part- no it's none of your business. The homeless guy maybe if she feels offended or unsafe but otherwise it should just be harmless. And your mother ... that is a hard one it depends on if you agree with your mother or not but you should always stick up for your wife when your own mother criticizes her.

He owes her protection from his own mouth. That's all. She needs to handle everything out in the world as though he didn't exist. If he didn't, she'd handle those things herself. EDIT: My ex's mom was impossible, but I never expected him to step in. He couldn't make her be decent, either, and she was abusive to him, too. I never decided to add this to our marital problems. If she had criticized my housekeeping, I would have laughed. I'm capable of a great deal of conflict resolution on my own.

Protect her against homeless guy...sure. At work...no. From a mother-in-law...definitely. A husband should put his mom in her place because it's HIS mom. Often MIL's will continue the attack on DIL's until the husband says something because the MIL believes she is helping her son by either criticizing the DIL until DIL changes certain behavior or until DIL leaves. The husband should shut the MIL up because its not her place to "fix" his wife. The homeless guy is just some jerk off the street and woman don't care what he thinks. A MIL is family and her words can sting worse and for longer because a woman wants approval from a MIL.

Yes it is a husband's role to protect his wife emotionally but only to a certain degree. In some situations it is not even the husband's business to even interfere, such as at work. The only time it is the husband's duty to interfere is if it is not on a business level. Such as the wife being criticized personally and not performance based. And even then it would be best for the wife to deal with the sitaution on her own. But when a husband's mother insults his wife then yes it is his duty to step in. If she can not stand up for herself then he should step in to defend or protect her. My husband is very protective sometimes over protective. Somethings I can just let things go but he takes things worst then I do. He would rather someone insult him rather then me and when they do he deals with it right then and there. I think it all depends. The couple should discuss what they expect from the other.

How does one even begin to understand a woman's range of emotions, let alone protect her from them? I would say, if a homeless man calls her a name as you walk past you tell him where he can stick it and to get a damn job so he doesn't need to panhandle. If her boss gives her a negative evaluation there's really nothing you can do about that and she needs to deal with that. If your mother criticizes her then yes, you should always defend her to your mother. Otherwise things can get ugly. Trust me. My mother and wife hate each other. That last bit is from experience.