What to do when you broke up with your man?

My man and I broke up and now I don't know what to do?

• my now ex- fiance have been together for four years and have two kids together (2yrs and a 3 month old). last week we had a one of many big fights but this time it turned into more than it initially was. i ended up giving back the engagement ring and he took most of the gifts he bought me. Anyways, after all these years of fights, heart ache, and hurt feelings im stuck. Im not sure what i should do at this point. i lived and breathed for this man and it still wasn't enough.im sooooooo confused right now. he thinks that everything is okay and that were going to be together but for me its not okay. im still hurting. even though it was a week ago it hurts as if it happened yesterday. he doesn't understand. a part of me wants to be with him and try to make things work but the other side of me is affaid of putting myself out there only to have him hurt me again. over the years ive lost SO much of myself into this man that now i look in the mirror and honnestly cannot recognize myself anymore. i don't know who i am. i thought i knew but all i was doing was living for his approval, letting him think for me and now that im faced with reality im lost. what should i do? i know i have to work on getting myself together, but how?

• Answer:

  Write. I am quite sure that your thoughts must be swarming everywhere! I am sorry that you have so much to deal with right now. Yet this is the perfect time to write so that you can read how you actually feel. If you believe in God, pray. Again and again and again. Remember that things are just as they should be. Maybe you need to really think about you and your babies for a change. My babies are pretty grown up now. I can remember years of worrying about how we would make it through--8 years of custody battles! I did it! And not with child support. It was my faith and God's loving heart! Ask and ye shall receive. Just start asking the RIGHT person.