Career advice - preschool teacher?

I need help with a teachers college / baby / career dilemma?

• I'm 26 years old, in a stable, loving marriage for two years and we've been together for nine. I do not have a job, but this past April I graduated from university with a bachelors degree, and was planning on going to teacher's college in January 2011. My husband and I have always wanted children, and I've known my entire life I've wanted to be a mother, but the whole career or baby issue has come up now. My husband and I feel like we want to have a child now. We are just at a point in our marriage where we are so in love and connected that a baby is the right step for us. We know we are emotionally ready, and though we don't own our home, we are financially able to afford a baby as my husband brings home about 48K a year. I would put off going to teacher's college till later in '11 or early '12 but I'm worried it will be entirely too difficult to handle school and a newborn baby. And it's not just the school work, it would be the three months of placement in a high school that would cause the most problems since I would be away all day, and need care for the baby 5 days a week. I feel like whether I have a baby now and my career gets pushed back further, is no different than going to school now, waiting to have a baby till I have a career, and then my career gets put on hold while I'm on maternity leave. If I only wanted one child, then I could fit a baby in at any point in our life and careers, but the problem is that we would like at least 3, and if I wait till I graduate teachers college, and then find a job, and then work for a year or two, I'm 28 or 29, and I don't know that either of us could wait that long. As a new generation of women, is it just ingrained in our minds by the older generation that you have to have a career first before children, even if you can emotionally and financially handle one now? It's like in my heart I know it's the right time but my head is saying no. I can have a career at 40 but I can't have children (or at least not as easily). And though I don't have a job, it's not like I don't have an education, whether I put off teachers college or not. I worry about what people (my friends, and my mother) will think if I have a baby before getting my teaching degree and career going; as if having a baby is a terrible thing. I'm so torn and exhausted from all this thinking 24/7 about my options, so any fresh insight or advice, or personal experiences, especially from teachers with babies if you career suffers at all when you go on maternity leave. Since I want more than two children, if I wait till I start my teaching career to have children, I feel it will suffer because I'd be on maternity leave every other year. I feel like life is so short to not do what will make you happy, and I just want people to be proud of me, especially my children, for having made the right decision to wait, or not to wait. I'm literally on the fence on this one so any positive advice is more than appreciated! Anyways, sorry if my question is all over the place! Thanks everyone!

• Answer:

  That's a really tough one. I think that as you want several children, it's better to begin having them soon. You never know if you might have difficulty conceiving, so it's good to try once you know you are ready. Yes, your teaching career might end up getting pushed back quite a bit - you may end up wanting to wait at least until all of your kids are in preschool. However, once you have kids, you may not feel as much desire to be working since you'll be quite busy, so that could help. I can also understand wanted to go to teachers' college now. If you do, I think you'd want to work for at least a year or two after you graduate to get started in the field. Then, you'll probably take off quite a few years for kids. I think you'll have a better chance of a job in the future if you graduate after kids than if you graduate, take off for kids, and try to get back into the field.