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Asian Male Difficulties and Media? What Can We Do About It?

• (This Mainly Applies to Asian-American Males in North America) Being an Asian American Male, we face a lot of negative stereotypes from the media. A lot of Asian Guys often see Asian Girls with Guys of Another Race. But you almost never see Asian Guys with Girls of Another Race. Why is that? First Outside Factors Not Involving an Asian Man Himself: 1. Asian American Males are portrayed by the media as wimpy, intelligent, nerdy, feminine, and asexual. In Fact, most Asian Men portrayed in Hollywood Media are intentionally portrayed unattractively. 2. You see many commercials, movies, and television shows that portray romance with Asian Women and Men of Another Race. But Rarely you see Asian Men being portrayed in a romantic/sexual matter anywhere in the media. 3. With the negative influence from the media, girls can never picture or imagine themselves being with an Asian Man. But they can with men of another race, because they've seen stories of being happily ever after with men of other colors. But Never with an East Asian Man. Because they never see it anywhere. Which makes it that much harder for them to open up to the possibility of it. 4. Because of the negative stereotypes Asian Men suffer, girls often gossip and make fun of Asian Guys. Many Girls say "Asian Guys are ugly (lol laughs)". "Asian Guys have small You knows." "Asian Guys are nice, and good Friend Types. But Never could be with them romantically". "Asian Guys Just Don't Do It For me For Some Reason". "I could never picture myself with an Asian Guy." "I can never be attracted to an Asian Guy". "Eww Asian Guys LOL" Etc... (I have either actually overheard or seen on the internet these types of messages from all types of girls). 5. Because of the Gossip and constant bad rep of Asian Guys going around the social scene of many girls around America. Girls who actually do feel attracted to Asian Guys, are too afraid to actually go for it, in fear of judgment and gossip from other Girls if they are seen with an Asian Guy Romantically. 6. Girls perceive Asian Guys to have low social value. If they date them all girls in their social circle will gossip and make fun of the couple. Or Make Fun of Her for Liking An Asian Guy. Therefore its better for girls to not take a chance, and keep her social rep and status safe. Factors from Asian Guys Themselves: 1. Asians are raised to be polite, quiet, and not showy. This has excellent qualities to be accepted in society, but they are also perceived to be very feminine qualities. Asians should still be respectful and polite, but they need a backbone and respect their own needs instead of just for others. 2. Asians have low self-esteem from the media. When you are seeing girls of your own race being sweeped off their feet by other guys, you feel there must be something wrong about us. You see the media constantly portraying Asian women being taken away by the dark tall handsome Caucasian male everywhere. Like Asian Guys are never meant to have romantic relationships, not even with their own race. Therefore, they don't know anything about themselves that appeals to women. Why should they when they don't see it or have examples/role models to follow? 3. When you hardly ever see Asian Guys dating Girls. How do you get an idea how to date someone? Asian guys just feel there is nothing appealing about themselves to girls. So they don't even bother. White Guys speak-well, are handsome with great Hair. Black Guys are Tall, Dark, Handsome, and well-built very masculine. Latino Guys are passionate and romantic with spanish/latin flavor. Middle Eastern Men have beautiful eyes and great features. Us Asian Guys?: We are seen as short, wimpy, and too uptight. As Seen by most girls. Or that is what we believe. 4. The completely ruined self-esteem comparing ourselves to guys of other race makes us feel even more inferior deep down inside that we won't admit. You don't see any of our guys dating girls of other race, like other guys do. Girls talk *bleep* about us. We have low social value too many people. Just too nice, but the friend type. Now the Main Focus of the Topic: What should Asian Guys do to improve their success in Dating and their masculine image overall? (With all the negative portrayal and stereotypes of the media).

• Answer:

  There's nothing you can do to change these stereotypes or the portrayals of East Asian men in the media. However, you can change how other people view you (assuming you're an East Asian man). It may be hard to override the culture that you were brought up in, but humans have a will and the capacity to do what is unnatural or uncomfortable to them in order to achieve something. #1 Asian men should is stop feeling sorry for themselves. There is nothing wrong with being East Asian, and if people talk trash about a race (racism) then that's their problem, not yours, so stop sulking and keep your chin up. #2 Be more gregarious. It's hard to gauge a personality if the person is quiet and hiding behind others all the time. East Asians were raised up to be quiet and respectful, but they can still be quiet and respect while being outgoing at appropriate times. #3 The more these actions are practiced, the more it becomes second nature and pretty soon it won't be uncomfortable. #4 If it's not a personality issue and a body issue, then that can be easily changed (except for height obviously). Need to lose weight? Play more sports. Need to gain weight/muscle? Hit the weight room. Need to put some color on your pale skin? Step away from the computer and go out with your friends. You can practice being social while enjoying the daylight. :) Lastly, your argument is on the extreme of one end. There are always girls of whatever race that particularly like East Asians or the quiet types or the shy types or the nerdy/smart types. In the end, don't change yourself so much that you're no longer you. If there is something that you'd like to improve on, then practice to do so. Just don't be pretentious, because in the end girls hate that snobby attitude too. Good luck.