Am I being sexually harassed?

Can men be sexually harassed?

  • There seems to be a socially pervasive steroetype that men cannot be sexually harassed; that if a woman makes unwanted sexual comments to a man, its "just flirting", when if roles were reversed, opinion would be that the woman most assuredly HAD been harassed. This stereotyping paints men as always being up for any kind of sex with any person at any time, which is simply not the case. Likewise it paints women as being sexually passive, always having things "done" to them. I'm in no way advocating for the allowance of sexual harassment for anyone, Im just curious about the factors that allow for this sort of thinking. Ive overheard women commenting on the sexual harassment of men saying things like "Oh please! He loved every minute of it!"....if the same were said by men about a woman, the men would be crucified. I'm not saying men, or women, are saints, but you would think, especially with laws regarding sexual harassment, there would be more equality in terms of the application of the law. What factors do you think contribute to this mind set that men can't be sexually harassed? Why do you think the courts don't rule more equally on these sorts of cases?

  • Answer:

    well this is a rarity, one of the few women out there that are actually looking out for us guys-i appreciate that. i think the main reason society thinks men can't be sexually harassed is due to what you said-the existing stereotypes. Society sees all men as perverted creatures with only one thing on their mind. Which is obviously, and certainly not true. But looking at this stereotype, here's the societal rhetorical question: what guy wouldn't want a woman making advances on him? Saying things to him that he might not want to hear? Gets offended by what he hears? Or gets touched in ways he doesn't want to / ways that make him feel uncomfortable? -he must be "gay" then if that's the case. That's an extreme statement there on my part, but seriously, it's like a guy would be totally looked at the wrong way for declaring sexual harassment against a woman. In terms of why courts don't rule more equally on these sort of cases, i in all honesty can't answer this for you, as i'm not familiar with just how many cases have been brought before the court relating to this sort of matter. It's really not oftentimes heard of; men declaring sexual harassment against other female employees (or employers). i think men might actually be quite afraid to report it (more so than women)...whether it be fear out of a hit to their reputation, a stigmatization consequence...something that they feel might even leave a mark on other men as silly as that sounds, but i think i can safely say that there really haven't been many court cases on this issue. As a result, i don't think there really is any true, uniform case law on the matter, so it could be difficult for jurors / judges to reach/make decisions. Mind you, i'm also including advances from other men in all of this too, like that one poster mentioned. i have been sexually harassed before. i didn't report it. For me, it had nothing to do with anything i have mentioned in this post, i'm just an extremely shy guy who usually doesn't speak up for myself.

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Other answers

Men can definitely be sexually harrassed. I used to work in an office full of women and I was the only male. One time an email was going around the office which showed a picture of a naked male celebrity and the women in the office were laughing at his pecker. The incident made me embarrassed and uncomfortable and I'm sure I felt just like a woman would feel if the opposite thing had happened in an office full of men. Edit: Dan A, you weren't there. I was a junior member of the team. Would you expect a junior woman to feel relaxed in an office full of older men who were looking at porn and making crude comments about it? I stood up for myself and I told them in an assertive way that they "Shouldn't be looking at men's ***** in the office". I already have a pair, thanks. There is nothing manly about letting women do this kind of thing in the workplace.

Soulminer

I saw something on the news a couple days ago, where men are actually reporting sexual harassment more than ever... Of the ones being filed, though, some of the men were actually being harassed by other men, so they can get harassed by both genders.

dark eyes

Yes, men can be sexually harassed, by both men and women. I think that this mind set is encouraged by men who think that harassing others is paying them a compliment. They fail to realize that if they themselves were harassed by people that they weren't attracted to, that it wouldn't be fun at all, nor would they find it complimentary.

Lynn Bodoni

Sure they can. A woman can make unwanted sexual suggestions to a man, touch him when he doesn't want to be touched. Factors that contribute to this mindset? The common but false belief that men want sex all the time, with any woman, anywhere, anyhow. The fact that female prostitution is big business. The fact that women are raped heterosexually and men rarely are. I don't know why courts don't rule more equally--I guess they don't take men who are sexually harrassed as seriously as they take women who are.

ccr

As a co-op student I had an older female supervisor persistently sending me sexually explicit and suggestive e-mails to the point where I was forced to take her up on it.

We come from France

Of course men can be sexually harassed. If a female boss says to her male employee, "if you don't sleep with me, you're fired" that's just as much sexual harassment as if the genders were reversed.

Wild Sage

Sexual harassment to a guy would have to be pretty severe for it to actually count if she was constantly touching his package or making people think he was sleeping with her or sending sexual messages and he is already married/got a girlfriend. Basically it would have to go further than words, for a man to be truly begin to be discomforted. EDIT: OMG soulmine grow a pair its just a damn picture its not even a picture of you where is the sexual harassment there .......

Dan A

SH is a catch word, or political slogan fabricated by feminists in order to split the heterosexual relationship then splitting up family then society then economics. It NEVER existed before in History. It's a lie! Most men would stop dead in track once seeing a woman frown, the rest would be shunted by men if she complains. It's a very limited problem that becomes a large multi-billions dollars business for parasitic components. Care to look at SH definition? Everything a man does CAN be DEEMED as SH. Even his breathing close to her could be, unless he stops breathing!

Politically Corrected PARROT

i was sexually harassed in school by 5 girls.anyway feminist sell societry this idea that men have no problems and that they are disposable so that's why no one cares

I Am Too Sexy

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