What Is The Permission Key For XJZ?

Why is it okay to have a living man's baby without his permission but not a dead man's?

  • Saw this fascinating question asking if a woman should be allowed to harvest her deceased husband's sperm so she could produce and give birth to his baby. http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20101021070035AADreZi&r=w#Ia1NMG.7AErZ5DffCZ3x I was absolutely shocked that virtually every answer said "Only if he had given permission before he died." WTF? Women give birth to living men's babies all the time without their permission! They trick the men into impregnating them (lying about being on birth control, for example), then strap him into child support payments for the next 18 years. And yet, here is a man who is deceased, and who will suffer no consequences one way or the other if he unknowingly fathers a child. And nearly everyone has said that this is wrong unless he had given his express permission before his death! Now, I've been on this board long enough to know that when a man tries to opt out of parenthood ("financial abortion"), most people call him a deadbeat and make comments about how he should've kept it in his pants if he didn't want a kid. In other words, it is fine to force fatherhood on a man against his will or sometimes even his knowledge. So why is it WRONG to use a dead man's sperm to produce a child without his permission, but it's perfectly okay to use a LIVING man's sperm to produce a child without his permission?

  • Answer:

    Your logic is impeccable, Megan. But there is little chance of reaching those who most need to hear your message. In their minds, men are always the oppressors and women always the victims. If a woman gets pregnant by a man, no matter what deception or pressure she applied, for them, it is always HIS fault. Therefore, your logic falls on deaf ears. After all, in their minds, the only good man is a dead man. For them a corpse, an inanimate object, has more rights than a living, breathing man. Also, with a living man, the opportunity exists to punish him my making him support, for the next 18 years, a child he did not want and perhaps was led to believe would not be conceived. And the opportunity to punish a man must never be passed up! With the dead man, no opportunity exists to punish him, so all of the sudden his rights are respected again. Please note that this answer only addresses the double standard you note. On the larger issue of what my wife can do with my body, I do NOT consider my body to be my own. It is HERS. She OWNS it!! (1 Corinthians 7:4) Thus, what she does with my sperm, whether I am alive or dead, is ENTIRELY up to her.

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Other answers

It isn't OK to use a man's sperm without his permission dead or alive

Blue Eyed Homo

The dead man is not on the hook for 18 years of child support payments.

Thundercat

Obviously we have two different standards when the mantra "Her body her choice" opposed to "His body his choice" is invoked or even assumed. Even in death it seems men's respect and rights are trampled on without true legal protection. Sad. As someone mentioned in the other question....do we see men harvesting women's ova after she dies so he can find a surrogate? eww indeed.

Dubs

i think it might be seen as mutilating a corpse. organs can't be harvested without express permission from the donor, even when the organs could save lives. the concept of respecting the dead would make harvesting a man's sperm without his permission, a crime.

lilly

Taking your husband's sperm without permission is almost as bad as having sex with your wife while she is passed out drunk. No permission. Your body is your own, permission is ALWAYS required. However, it is true that men always take the risk of getting a girl pregnant. He should always wear a condom, even if she says she's on the pill. This is just common sense to protect men against being a father when they don't want to be. I believe that if sperm is taken from a man against his will, or without his consent, it should be considered grounds to opt out of child support, or even bring her up on charges. That's just common sense. However, this would always be terribly difficult to prove. Specifically about the woman with the dead husband, she creeps me out. What child would want to grow up knowing their father was DEAD when he was conceived. *shudders* Anyways, while men (and women) must live with the idea that them having sex may lead to this situation, anything without consent should be considered illegal. Just because sperm leaves the body and eggs stay inside, doesn't make men any less the "owners" of it.

Adam

First of all, the sperm has to be harvested BEFORE he dies as a human body decomposes rapidly after death and the mechanism for expressing the sperm is not viable, in short he's dead and his body doesn't work anymore. And so, this is where the legality comes into play. If he is alive (and he must be to donate), then he must give permission for his bodily fluids to be harvested for medical science or personal gain. Here is the conundrum. Also, in some states, permission must be gotten to "harvest" certain body parts (such as the corneas) after death...you just can't pick a body apart without someones permission and so "harvesting" the testicles in hopes of sperm extraction immediately after death is pretty touchy legally. It may be hard to find a surgeon willing to do this and keep the glands on ice. All this is pretty gruesome and legally questionable. I think it is like harvesting a woman's ovum after death, putting them on ice and looking for a surrogate to carry the test tube pregnancy to term. While I don't necessarily think either of these scenarios is ethically WRONG...it's just legally in a gray area. Perhaps someone who is a lawyer can jump in here with thoughts. This is a good question.

Judy & Charlie

First of all there is no such thing as tricking a man into having a baby. If a man has voluntary sex then he is consenting to the possibility of a child with his partner as no birth control is 100%. Secondly I see no issue with harvesting a dead husbands sperm he's dead what does he need it for? Also he married her in my opinion marriage is also consenting to the possibility of children.

Puddle Dive

Because that child would have no possible way to ever even meet the natural dad, right from the start. The kid would be doubly illegitimate--not only born out of wedlock, which to me is not a big deal, but born of a dead entity. I'd call it "Body Bastardy". LOL ;-)

DinDjinn

Don't forget, I'm pretty sure it's not illegal for women to "steal" the sperm from a discarded condom and attempt to impregnate herself with it.

kg1

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