Why do mean and deceitful people seem to always get ahead?

Why do most people seem to be 2 faced gossipers, and why do they treat u like an outcast if you don't gossip?

• I notice this everywhere, but especially in the workplace. There are the typical gossipers that everybody knows (and are wary of), but then there are some real sly ones, who you wouldn't expect, and they can be the most vicious. Why do most people find mindless gossip acceptable, when most of the time it's harmful in some way? I honestly know about 2 people in the world who avoid gossip, and I respect them for that. Even if something is true about somebody, I'm still old enough to know that it's totally wrong and sad to spread it round people just because I can (unless it's important news about someone dangerous who could harm people....but that's not mindless gossip). How do most other people not know something so obvious? Instead, most people seem to think that it is ok to be nasty to people (but in a cowardly way, which is much worse), even though they wouldn't like it done to them (double standards). In present society, if you expose the gossipers you will be called a grass/snitch. It's hypocritical though, as gossiping is blatantly a massive form of grassing/snitching, and can also be a form of outright slander and maliciousness when it happens to be false or not fully accurate. Why do people condone it? They're worse than the main gossipers themselves, and sadly, it's the majority of society. I won't stop exposing gossipers. A gossiper's weak counter attack against me exposing them is to say that I'm also a gossiper by informing the victim of who the persecutors are. My strong defence to that is that I don't spread anything round a bunch of people (which is what gossip is........a chain/web of stories/rumours/facts/lies/part truths). I just go straight to the person that was being gossiped about, and end of, it's dealt with, it's over. Whenever somebody comes up to me with any little juicey gossip about someone, I say I'm not into sad gossiping, and let the gossipee know who the gossipers are. It's great seeing a gossiper's face when you do it. They freak out, because you have the courage to do that, when they don't even have the courage to say something to the person's face. They immediately know they're the weaker minded person. I don't care if it makes me unpopular among people that I don't respect anyway. Most people just want an easy life and let it happen, and I personally believe this is so bad. I don't care if i'm the only non-gossip in the room and can't be in their sad little gang. Gossip is one of the most discreet and cowardly forms of bullying, and psychological abuse, and it needs to be fought, and stamped out over time (even if it takes centuries). Gossip seems to be more rife in modern western society than anywhere else. There are all sorts of excuses to condone it, like celeb gossip. I couldn't care how many affairs a sports star has had, and they will have absolutely no effect on how my kids turn out. I bring them up. So all this role model stuff is just one big fat excuse for engaging in something as sad, and wicked as gossip. .......Going back to the workplace stuff, one of the biggest excuses for being a cowardly gossiper, is sayin that the only reason you don't say it to the person's face is because you care about their feelings (no you don't), and that it's just banter. If it's just banter, then how would it hurt their feelings to their face? ......I could argue forever about this, and win everytime in a live discussion. Whether gossip is true or false, it is wrong (unless it's to protect society from danger). But spreading embarrassing, or hurtful personal stuff about someone, shouldn't ever be condoned in any way. What's wrong with the people who think this is ok? What's wrong with the people who say things like "well they bring it on themselves"? Even if someone has brought something on him/herself, they aren't the ones telling loads of people. The gossipers are, and more often than not, they're aren't just harming the main victim. Did the person's relatives bring it on themselves? No. Another reason why gossip like this survives, is because of the weak minded people who say"you'll never get rid of it", or "everybody gossips". I don't gossip, and I know two other people who don't. I hope I can meet more someday. In no way do I mean to be self-riteous, but I'm proud that i don't spread things around about people, or tolerate such nasty behaviour towards other human beings.

• Answer:

  Basically people gossip because their own lives don't seem to be interesting or they'd be talking about themselves all the time rather than other people. If you don't gossip then the gossipers think you are too high minded, that you don't see news about other people as worthy enough to talk about and they shun you, because they want you to be like them. When all you want is to respect other peoples personal life and not spread private matters or opinions about other people's problems, and you'd like people to respect your private life. The general safety of the public is what information should be shared concerning a certain individual or a group. If a dangerous person is on the loose the public are warned not to approach but to inform the proper authorities and not interfere. Gossipers are the town criers of today, the only thing missing is the bell to ring and get everyone's attention. Gossipers ignore you because they don't get your attention, you're not interested in hearing about what the next door neighbours are getting up to or another colleague is doing something in their private life. I don't read magazines, newspapers or listen to the news because nothing interests me about celebs private lives. I like facts about things that concern me and might affect my life. Hearing about what someone else has been doing doesn't affect my life so I don't buy anything that contains information like this, I don't even own a TV because the soaps, reality TV and news is just unimportant, it doesn't affect my life or interest me, because I don't want to know about fictional lives in soaps, or false personalities that play to the camera in reality TV shows to revive or boost their careers, or what celebrities are doing today. I did embarrass one gossiper once, they tried to tell me what someone was doing and asked what did I think, I told them I don't have an opinion about someone unless it is them that ask me my opinion about anything they share with me and also added "You want to hear what people are saying about you" When they asked me what were they saying I just said "I don't gossip."