My son has a non-verbal learning disability. He is going into grade 9, first year high school. I want opinions
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I just had a meeting with the Examiner. Everytime I have a discussion with her I get furious with the elementary school teachers. From her report, "(no name) did not receive learning assistance in elementery school although school reports indicate that he struggled in the areas of attention. organization and written output. (no name) was referred for an initial cognitive assessment in his grade 5 year. The referral was madde on the recommendation of his pediatrician with whom (his) mother had consulted due to conceerns about his attention and its affect on his social interactions at school." I was almost desperate when he was in grade 5. The school insisted I needed to do more at home and gave me examples. Nothing ever helped my son to learn or improve in school. I was made to feel like a horrible parent; it was all my fault. Everything they told me to do was wrong and they were teaching him wrong. I am MAD They should have noticed the problem and had him assessed.
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Answer:
Federal law (PL 94-142) mandates a "free and appropriate public education", which includes disabilities of all types. I'm afraid that schools frequently miss problems like your son's, so the onus is on the parent to demand an evaluation, go through the IEP process ("Individualized Education Plan"), and push every step of the way. He should, at the very least, be working with a "resource specialist" at school. Since you've already met with the examiner, her recommendations need to be followed. Call the school and and tell them you want an IEP meeting so your boy can get the help he needs. The key is not to ask, but TELL them what you expect. If the school district is unable to provide appropriate services, the MUST pay for the help your child needs, even if it is in another setting.
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Other answers
You are by no means a bad parent, but at the same time you can't rely on the school to take care of things either. When I was growing up I had major attention and behavioral problems in school. My parents worked with me all on their own with no help from the school and by about the time of 7th grade I was functioning normally in social situations and maintaining a 4.0 in AP classes. To deal with keeping my attention on things they played a game where they would make me sit still for increasing periods of time. It seemed almost unbearable but there were rewards for it, so I always did it. They also helped me with my homework as much as I could. If you cannot find a way to help your son at home, or if he needs help with a subject (ie: advanced math, science) that you don't recall, there are always placed like Sylvan Learning Center that you can take him to. Or perhaps a psychologist can suggest other methods. Just remember: homeschooling is not the answer, it will cause your son to be socially inept, and drugs are not the answer either - drugs will just make him into a zombie, they will not fix the learning impairment. Best of luck. It will be hard, but you seem to put your son before anything else, so I'm sure in the end both of you will get through this unfortunate situation.
Michael B
I suggest you just homeschool him if he cant keep up. Or put him in an extra help class that most school offer for impaired students. Good Luck! P.s.- From how this is affecting you I dont beleive that you are a horrible parent.
~Nonya~
The very fact that you are searching and trying sooo hard to help your child says you are a Great Parent! The system sux not you! Watch todays Oprah .. it may have some answers for you .. seriously .. it sounds like some of what you have on your plate will be addressed on todays show (thurs. 5 April '07)
Janis J
My younger brother has a similar problem, and I helped to tutor him through school. With most learning disabilities, the only thing you can do is allot a specific time to do school work, and make absolutely certain he understands everything he's done during that period. Yes, the school should have noticed the problem, and they should have done a great deal of this tutoring. Usually though children are more responsive to parents, so it's good for you to help as well outside school. It is fairly pointless though if they haven't tried to assist, because you'd have had to teach the entire day of schooling to him over again. I'm very surprised the school ignored the recommendations of your pediatrician. You definately should go after them, even if just to make sure they don't treat another student this way.
Laura
I do not believe this is your fault. Do not let them make you feel that way. I would file a written complaint with the head of the school district. When it is in writing they can't just sweep it under the rug, they do have to investigate. Threaten to hire an attorney if you do not feel satisfied with their investigation. But remember if you do threaten them you will need to back it up. Keep a copy of all correspondence with them. Good luck.
grandmaluvalot
Nothing will be done until you fill out the form to have him assessed the cant do any thing until they have your permission.I would suggest you fill one out as soon as possible it is never too late to help your child.Once you fill out the form for a assessment they will notify you in 10 days.If no one contacts you you need to fill out another form.If you receive no response then you will need to contact you state board of education.You need to take names of the people you talk to to see who is the blame.When someone makes a referral for a assessment it is usually in writing and will be in your sons files.Ask to see your sons files to see if the request for a assessment were ever sent.There are laws in place to make sure teachers and staff are held accountable.Good Luck
Zim
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