Can you grade my essay?

Can somebody grade my SAT practice essay?

• took it on college board, and they gave me a 6 (1-6 scale) but its a automated grader i think so can somebody grade it please? : Essay Prompt A colleague of the great scientist James Watson remarked that Watson was always “lounging around, arguing about problems instead of doing experiments.” He concluded that “There is more than one way of doing good science.” It was Watson’s form of idleness, the scientist went on to say, that allowed him to solve “the greatest of all biological problems: the discovery of the structure of DNA.” It is a point worth remembering in a society overly concerned with efficiency. Adapted from John C. Polanyi, “Understanding Discovery” Assignment Do people accomplish more when they are allowed to do things in their own way? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your reading, studies, experience, or observations. Your Response To get things done, there are always multiple ways of it being done. Without direct guidelines, any of these ways can be achieved. Peoples brains work in a strange way, in which they can always come up with new ideas, that might end up being better and more efficient than any previous ways. People who are allowed to do things their own way accomplish much more due to enjoying the process they are doing, as well as understanding exactly how to accomplish what they are attempting. Many people have millions of ideas running through their heads at all times, and sometimes they actually go through with the ideas. The best inventions or ideas were spontaneous and not planned. One instance of this is Benjamin Franklin and the kite. When Benjamin Franklin discovered that the key on the kite worked as a lightning rod, nobody told him he needed to discover something like this, or how she should do it, he just accomplished this spontaneously. If he was stuck in a room with guidelines on how somebody else thought he should have done it, nothing would have ever been created, considering there are many "X factors" that separates a good invention, from a great invention. While it might be spontaneous for people to come up with their own ideas, the inventors definitely get a great feel for what they are working with if the idea of invention comes straight from their minds. Sometimes, when people are told to do something they may not completely understand what they need to do or how. It is similar to how a baby discovers wonders of the world. There is no way to make them say something but when they are ready they will say their first word, or take their first step however not because anyone told them how, but my experimenting with multiple words or ways to balance themselves to stand up. In my life I see people accomplishing things by doing it their own ways every day. In the world of baseball, nobody plays the game the same way. Everyone has a different glove, swing, and way of throwing. This is because it is what works for them, not anybody else. Baseball is one sport that has the freedom of being able to do what you want and how you want to do it, while still being successful. If everyone had the same swing, or throw, it would be impossible to differentiate one baseball player from another and where they should play their position. Many daily activities such as baseball are great, for the reason that there is so much freedom, and people are aloud to accomplish things by doing it their own way. The main reason that people accomplish more by doing things their own way is because it works for them, and is personal to them. When people come up with their own ideas they are the masters at it and they can easily accomplish it, whereas if there are guidelines, it may not be the easiest or best way to complete a task making it less likely for someone to accomplish

• Answer:

  I really don't feel like reading this, but my college prep place gave me a rubric and it goes like this: Find and lavel your thesis statement by placing a star next to it. Find and label your specific examples. How many did you use?_____ Circle the Transition words you used. Do your ideas logically connect?______ The Basics Your essay has: ___A clear thesis that addresses the prompt ___ Some type of suport for the thesis ___A logical progression of ideas. If you cannot check off the first three, your score will not be higher than a 3 of 6! Organization Introduction: ___Simply restates the prompt (1 pt) ___Clearly states thesis(2pts) ___Inspires further reading and is unique(3pts) Transitions: ___Do not exist(0pts) ___Are basic:"Also", "So" ect.(1pt) ___Are strong: "Furthermore," "Therefore," "However" etc(2pts) Conclusion: ___Doesn't exist(0pts) ___Simply restates the thesis(1pt) ___Makes a critical connection or raises a good question(2pts) Approximate page length: ___1/2(0pts) ___1(1pt) ___1 1/2 - 2(2pts) Critical thinking Did I include a strong topic sentence for each paragraph? ___No(0pts) ___Yes(1pt) How many specific examples did I use? ___0(0pts) ___1(1pt) ___2 or more(2pts) Did I include commentary and elaboration for my examples? __No(0pts) ___For some(1pt) ___For all(2pts) Do my specific examples connect to and support my thesis? ___No(0pts) ___Yes(1pt) Grammar & Sentence Structure Circle and then list the high level vocabulary words you used. _______________ Do you vary your vocabulary, or do you tend to repeat the same words?______________ Underline the first five words in every sentence. Do you see any sentences that can be combined?__________________ How many of your sentences begin with a subject/verb pattern?______________ Did I use any high level vocabulary? ___No(0pts) ___1-5 words(1pt) ___6 or more words(2pts) Did I avoid fragments and run-ons? ___No(0pts) ___Yes(1pt) Did I use varied sentence lengths? ___No(0pts) ___Yes(1pt) Scoring 18-19 points - 6 16-17 points - 5 11-15 points - 4 9-10 points - 3 6-8 points - 2 0-5 points - 1 I apologize for not reading your essay, but here are a few tips: Almost no one makes a six so either you're a genius or your computer's an imbecile. NEVER use personal stories, the SAT essay graders enjoy people who know their history (but make sure you use it correctly and apply it to your question) and use as many vocab words as you can incorporate while still making sure it flows. Good luck with your SAT, wish me luck on mine, haha :)