How do we control our bladder during sleep?

How can I die peacefully in my sleep?

• I am 86 years old. I live in a seniors' home. In the past month, I have found that I can no longer control my bladder and now wear a diaper. I've had a very good life. My family is healthy and no longer depend upon me. I wish to take the next step in my life. I want to cross over. I'm 86; it is time to move on. I only want my family to feel a typical sense of loss as my earthly body dies. I wish to die in my sleep. I am weak, and I seek to take an excess of medication that will cause my death with the appearance that I peacefully died in my sleep. I have spoken to no one about this. My wife awaits me as I make this next step, along with brothers, sisters, and friends to numerous to mention. I find myself excited to be seeing them again. But, it makes my days very long - I look back on my life all day long. I'm proud. Too proud to have someone changing my diapers. It is time to go. Can you, anonymously, help me in this next step? At my age, it is just that - a step. A step away from chronic pain, away from medications that artificially keep me here. Do not feel guilt in your assistance, rather, feel my hand as I move forward and entrust this life and this earth to you. Sincerely, James.

• Answer:

  I'm not trying to trivializing how you feel, but rather want to give some advice and support to you. So, you feel because your 86 your not needed? Are you grieving for your wife, sir? I'm sorry. Everyone, at all ages.. has the blues from time to time.it's not you fault and not a sign of weakness to feel depressed. Things will get better. Maybe not this moment,sometimes it just takes time... but try first to take a big breath and pull yourself out of the "Funky Blues". and share your feelings to a trusted friend family member or a spiritual counselor, or a nurse Just like you have here in this forum to receive Answers. Your Answers have to come from within your self. I choose Prayer to my Heavenly Father to help me ask for answers. Sounds like you need to spend time with other people and engage in activities that give you some piece and pleasure. How about looking for small opportunities to be helpful to someone less fortunate. My mom is 86 and suffers from Alzheimer's, Father is 89 and has Parkinson's Disease. He is a proud man (A Veteran) they both live in my home. Mom loves just sitting outside in the the chair watching Dad and I work in the vegetable garden. We all listen to Audio books. Try listening to "Water for Elephants" I think you would like it. Also, Think of things you like to do and don't be afraid to ask for help. Be proud your 86 years old, If you are a Father- be proud of that accomplishment, If your a grandfather or great grandfather be proud of that as well. My Dad gets on the computer and writes his memories of World War II and Korean War as a Marine. Or you can type a letter to your wife if she died and let her know how much she ment to you, or the story of how you met. Your children would appreciate your Memories of raising them. Wearing Depends (diaper's) is nothing to be ashamed of...your children will be wearing them someday...Our body's just wear out after awhile. Let others help you, they want to help... don't feel too proud.