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How to move to the US?

How should we ask my son's fiance to move with us?

  • My son Andrew was diagnosed with cancer a little over 1 year ago. He has qualified for experimental treatment which is a blessing, although we have to move. My son is unable to live with us and has already been moved to the hospital. His fiance Emily is still living in their apartment and is 8 hours away from Andrew, she drives every over day to the hospital, which is a lot to taken on for a 22 year old girl. My husband and I are moving to be with Andrew in a couple of days and really think we should ask Emily to move with us. I want her to be able to be with Andrew because I know she is the only thing that keeps him going. My husband and I have thought and talked it over we think that we should ask her. were not asking her to move with us fully. Were thinking of just asking her to stay the weekends at first and so on. We are unsure on how to big this up to her and don't want it to seem like were pushing her to move. What would be the best way to talk to her about this because we know this is just as hard for her as it is us? how could we bring this up?

  • Answer:

    Just say, "Hey Emily, we know you drive a lot and thought once we move into our new home you could stay on the weekends with us to save you money on hotel, food and gas costs." Just ask straight out, she will probably appreciate it, don't push, if she says no, just ask periodically to remind her the option is still open.

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I feel the best approach would be something like "We know how much you mean to Andrew and we know how difficult it can be driving 8 hours to see him all of the time. We would like to make it easier for you by offering you to come live with us while he is in hospital." Don't make it a "freebie" make it clear she will be contributing to the household finances (paying rent, groceries, etc), that you are suggesting this to make it easier for everyone.

I think this is beautiful. It shows that you have love for this girl through your son. Now, I would suggest that you sit down and you talk to her. The same way you expressed your self here you do that with her and let her know that you are not forcing her you want her to go on her own will. Another thing to keep in mind is that if she says no it's not because she doesn't want to it will be because of stability.She will have a need to feel stable and of course we all know that we have people that like to throw people out of their homes and she may have this feeling. Just talk to her have a nice dinner or breakfast and talk to her. This will work out in your favor. GOOD LUCK! and best wishes to your son.

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