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REALLY FUNNY PICTURES?

My brother-in-law snapped a set of pictures of my 2 year old son that I found really inappropriate...?

  • My BIL is a photography major and he really does some amazing things with his camera. Thanks to him, we've gotten SEVERAL amazing shot's of our son, who is now 2. He recently gave me a memory stick with ALL the picture's he's ever taken of my son, and there were a few hundred in the bunch that I'd never seen, most likely, he had been snapping them when my son was staying the night at my in-law's and I wasn't there... There is a set of about 50-75 pictures of my son in my MIL's shower and I am really uncomfortable with them... My son is sitting on the built-in-bench in the shower, naked, and holding/playing with the shower head... I know it was an innocent moment of my son playing in the shower but it really rubs me the wrong way that he would pick THAT moment to snap pictures of my child... I don't know what to do or say... I am not cool with anyone taking nude pictures of my son.. I dont' even take naked pictures of him! Just purely out of respect for him when he gets older... and this particular set of pictures is really creepy looking... I don't want my BIL to think I don't appreciate him taking candid shots of my son, and I definitely don't want him to stop snapping photo's but how can I tell him nicely that I really do not appreciate the nude shower pictures of my 2 year old? I just don't want pictures like that around of my baby.... Am I overreacting here?.... I am his mother, and even I was uncomfortable looking through these photo's! ... It's hard to describe unless you actually saw the pictures...

  • Answer:

    Most people do have naked pictures of their babies, their own babies. You may even go have pictures taken that give the idea that the child is naked (baby in a bucket type thing). And most naked pictures people have of their kids are as babies. I would have issues with someone, anyone taking pictures of my child that could be misconstrued as child pornography. The thing that I find concerning about this question is that there are so many pictures, not one or two. Can you see your son's privates in the pictures? If so I would find that even more concerning. You just don't know who you can trust, including family, and this I find a little suspicious. If I were you I would tell your bil that you appreciate all the pictures and the work that goes into taking/producing the end product but... you do not want him to take any more shower/nude shots. Tell him those pictures make you feel uncomfortable and even though they maybe "art" you do not want any nude pictures of your child taken. Try to be polite, but be firm. You don't want to appear wishy washy, and if this upsets your bil, then I would say that there maybe more to the pictures than just photographic artwork.... and my son would never be alone with him again.

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Maybe overreacting a little. Most people I know do have shots of their kids during bath time. Some of the cutest pictures I have of my kids are bathtime photos. None of their privates are showing but you know they are naked. Is he more exposed in the ones your BIL took? If you are uncomfortable with him taking them, just tell him.

There are famous photographers who take wonderful pictures of naked children. Since your BIL gave you the pictures, I don't think he had any bad intentions. If he had, he would have hidden them. You could have a talk with him and ask that he not take any more pictures of your child nude. He's likely to think you're uptight, but you're entitled to make the rules. But unless you see some evidence that your son is reacting strangely to the BIL, I wouldn't overreact.

Exactly as you said it. If it's your husband's brother have your husband/partner do it.

no!

Did you know he was in the bathroom with your son naked? Is it usual that your BIL would give your son a shower? I think it's weird and creepy not only that he took the pictures but that he took so many!! 50-75 puctures of youir son naked in the shower? That's creepy. I would tell him straight up that you don't want naked pictures, and use the excuse that with the internet today, once those pictures are taken and get out there, even unintentionally like someone's computer getting stolen or hacked, there's no way to get them back. And then I would never allow my BIL unsupervised around my child again. Not even kidding about that. That's called grooming behavior.

Send him a link to your question, or print it out.

I personally don't think there's anything wrong with those pictures, but he's your kid, so it's up to you to decide what's OK and what isn't. Just tell BiL, like you did here, that you do appreciate him giving you all these the pictures, but you don't want him to take any more while the kid is naked. You could also ask him to delete his copy of the shower pictures. I think he'll understand, everyone knows how sensitive this topic is, and as photographer he should be especially aware.

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