How can I tell my friend that I can't go to her wedding even though she's planning to come to mine?

I'm a big fan of the truth. When invites go out, RSVP in the negative. If she asks you about it, level with her. Tell her it's too much expense right before your own wedding.

Oh boy.. this is a tough one. Is there a more economical way to get there (Amtrak, Greyhound.. driving.. ?) You will need to be honest with her.. have a talk and see how she feels. Explore all your travel options first, this way at least you can let her know that you have sought out other means. It's a big day.. but I'm sure she will not want you to break your bank to be there. Besides, a true friend will understand.. but I do think you should talk her about it. Don't just bail.

Call her immediately and say that since you accepted her invitation, your financial situation has changed and you cannot attend her wedding after all. You need not go into details at all. The more you say the broader the dialogue gets and you will find yourself defending your decision. A good friend would understand. Do not even mention her coming to your wedding as that really has zero to do with this situation. As I said, a good friend would understand.

Start saving. charge it and after you get married use some of the funds to pay your ccard.

Call her and talk to her, be honest with her. Usually when people are planning weddings they are really tight so if she's really tight then she'll understand. Or she may be willing to pay for something to give you a hand. When we got married we helped some of our friends and family from out of town get special rates at a hotel, ask her if she's thought about that? There are many possibilities so just remember to ask, and be honest. Don't feel embarassed she'll understand.

the best way is to just tell her let her know that you are very very sad to be missing it, but it just isnt plausible for you to make it to her wedding im sure she will understand the situation i would still send her a nice gift to let her know you were thinking of her

A true friend would understand. However, do approach the matter tactfully as a friend for life is far better than the money you would save on avoiding the wedding.

Decline with regrets, cite financial difficulties due to the wedding expenses. No further explanation is needed. If you can't go, you can't go period. Good luck

Tell her the truth. you cannot afford it and why. If she comes to yours and is understanding great; if not, all you lose is someone who is not a friend.