Feeling sick, but I don't know what it's from?

Have been feeling quite depressed lately. and dont know what to do/ who to turn to...please help?

• well, to begin off, i am a 17 year old male who amung alot of people, noone really looks up to me or helps me out or anything really. i've had alot of things happen to me in my life and at times there were things thawere happening then, and then things have been hapening around now. i used to live with my grand ma and dad, and now i don't. when i lived with my grandma and dad, things were going alright for a while. around 2 or 3 years ago, my dad got pretty bad and started to drink every day and soon it got pretty bad to where now i am now in a different family. in my life, there were alot of things that have been happening and now im feeling the aftereffects from it all. i used to have alot of people that were "friends"with me, and now for some reason noone talks to me no more. and then when i had to deal with my problems, i couldnt do nothing for them. i was basically trapped and when i worked at my summer job during the summer it was a way to relieve stress, and it did help a little. one of the people there talked with me a little and helped me out, but this year, when i went back, he started to get anoyed and now he doesnt like to talk about me,/ i am too afraid to talk to him now because i know that he would be mad. and now, that im home from my job, i have been fealing very depressed at times. alot of times i havent been able to concentrate, and i have thought about suicide a few times. and now that i'm back home, i don't have anyone to talk with. i dont really like to talk about my feelings and what happened to me because when i do, it scares people and makes people uncompforable about talking about it, and so i dont really talk to anybody about them, and like my friend, people get dissapointed in me because when i do find someone they start to get mad at me bcs i like to talk to them about my feelings and/or what has happened, and so now i dont have noone to talk with. i have been feeling down alot and i try to work it out alot of times but other times it doesnt help. i could go to councelling but im afraid it wont help me at all. at tmes ill be happy and then other times ill feel very depressed and just want to be by myself, and that has been very dificult to do the only thing i want to do that can help out is this: i just need to talk with someone about my problems; someone who has had problems just like mine in the past and/or is still having problems. i want someone who i know that i can trust/that wont get dissapointed. i just need someone who too has emotional problems who would be able to talk with me and help me out; someone who has had a type of abuse when they were younger. that's all i ask for. what i dont want is: someone who wants to talk to me about my problems who think they have an idea of what happened but doesnt/some who just want to talk to me. i just want someone who has had what happpened to me happen to them

• Answer:

  You are describing the need for a counselor. Why would you be afraid to talk to one, that is what they are trained to do, is listen to you and help you figure out what is going on in your emotions and your life. Of course friends don't understand and get burned out on listening to you, that is too "heavy' for them. A counselor will listen, be nonjudgmental and help you understand what you need and want. I'd say go to your doctor and ask for a referral to mental health professional and get started!