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Tell me what good is law enforcement if you cannot get any help with your own kid threatining to kill himself?

  • I am 48 years of age, I have a 27 year old at home with no job. No income and he does nothing all day long and stays up all night. When he is comfronted about these situations he says if he was dead noone will have to worry about him. I called law enforcement and they will not do anything cause it isn't against the law. I will have to deal with him or have him go to the third floor psychiatiy on his own otherwise there is nothing they can tell me to get some relief.

  • Answer:

    As an unbiased outsider, it sounds like your son is manipulating you. Everytime you confront him with the issue, he diverts the situation by threatening suicide. And, because you don't want to have the burden of being responsible for him doing it (if he really would do it), you just squash the argument. Honestly, sometimes the kindest love is the harshest...meaning, you really need to kick your son out and make him stand on his own two feet. Let him know that you love him and that you would do anything positive to help him, but he needs to move on with his life, begin following his dreams and allow you to live yours. Give him a 3 month deadline to get a job and get out. Where he goes is his business, but he must move on. I say all this not to be mean or heartless, but because I see this same situation going on with my parents and siblings. My mother has my brother, his wife and their two kids in her home. They are mooching off of her and she is paying the price mentally, physically and emotionally. The same situation is going on with my dad and my younger sister. I know parents love their kids and don't want them to get hurt, but what good are you doing them by allowing them to stay at home and do nothing. And, finally, if your son did decide to harm himself, it would be HIS decision. You can not allow yourself to take the burden of that. Just like if you were to harm someone or yourself, you couldn't blame your son for it. You can't allow him to put that blame on you either.

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Throw him out of your home. If you don't want him there the police WILL remove him.

Law enforcement does a lot of good, however they can only enforce the law. It is not illegal to be depressed, a 27 year old no load or to think that suicide is the answer. They simply can't arrest him for those things. However, you as a parent can encourage him to seek help. Make an appointment with a therapist and take him there.

i work with the mentally and criminally insane..i deal with this type of stuff on a day to day basis. your son who obviously is being enabled by you (yes sorry) should be kicked outta the house. two call 911 and sometimes you have to lie to get people the help they need. tell em that your son is threatening to harm himself and others and your concerned with the saftey of yourself as with his. if theres no response from them then you need to bring him to the er with the same story. you may want to kick him out and change the locks first. good luck

The function of the police is to protect the public in general, not individuals. It's solidly engraved in case law that the protection of individuals is not a police function, a fact generally unknown except perhaps to NRA members! You can petition the court for psychiatric commitment, and if you get the paperwork done, then the appropriate law enforcement agency may get involved. You just started in the wrong place.

ignore him.....well not fully but councilling would be a good idea...jeez your being so nice on the kid..if i was him at my house i woulda been kicked on the street long time ago

I hope someone can give you a good answer. I went through all that a few years ago.From when he was 13 to 18.. Police couldn't help, they made it seem like I was inconveniencing them..hosp. wouldn't take the right steps and the same with mental hosp.. they just kept watching it happen over and over again even when my son did OD there was still no help.. The system failed him terribly.. I did as much as I could do with out going to the nut house myself, I finally kick him out and he is now on his own and struggling so much. I feel horrible, like I left him for the sharks, after all he did not ask to be brought into this world.. the guilt eats at me everyday.. Good luck to you, I hope you find answers and help.. you here about help programs all the time, well where are they when you need them?? Ones that take action rather then paper work over and over...

Unfortunately, passive 'threats' don't really merit much attention from the police. If there is IMMINENT danger of him hurting himself or anyone else then law enforcement does have an obligation to intervene. This would likely result in involuntary psychiatric hospitalization for him.

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