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What should i do, my girl friend broke up with me because she is scared of things getting too serious?

• My girlfriend and i just broke up yesterday. I am still confused. Just a last month she basically poured her heart out to me crying saying that she was really happy with me, i make her feel perfect. She said that when she thinks about her future, she sees me in it, she said she wants to be with me forever. She sees us growing old, she even talked about having kids. when she said these things to me it came as a complete shock because i KNOW her...i've known her for years b4 going out with her, i was one of her best friends, so for me to hear these things from her, I KNEW it was a big deal for her. honestly when she said these things from me, aside from being shocked, i was happy and i told her this.....i am really in love with her. I never been so happy in my life. A few week after, her nephew passed away, i noticed her acting a little weird. She stopped saying I love you, stopped calling/answering calls, stopped texting as much.....she would just be acting weird towards me and about 2 weeks ago, i cooked her dinner...when we finished we went to walmart and she said she had to leave, and i know i should understand she had to leave, but since she was acting weird...i was alittle frustrated and i told her that "i felt like i had to beg her to come out with me"...she said i dont, we had a talk and basically i let her know that i know she has family commitments and that im not trying to come between them and that i COMPLETELY understand that her family needs her. lately i know shes been going thru alot in her family...her nephew died, dad is going to the hospital, she works ALL day(1pm -930pm...sometimes later) at her internship and her job....she basically has NO time for herself. A few days ago i got a call for an intervew with a company i REALLY want to work for, i wanted to call her but i had to think twice about calling her....i shouldnt have to think twice about calling my girlfriend about these things. she didnt pick up and i said call me back. when she caled me back i kind of leashed out on her. I said that i felt she was avoiding me, i felt that when she wants me she picks me up and when shes done she just lets me go.....i felt like she was taking me for granted, that i feel like im the only one who reaches out. I basically told her ever since we had that talk, i been feeling like crap, because of the way shes been acting. she said she had to go...and we'll talk later, but we didnt...and that ate me up inside bc i KNEW what was gonna happen. yesterday i finally accepted it, and i just let her contact me. she sent me a text after work on friday bc fridays she works from 9-5. she wanted to meet up to talk. we did, and she wanted me to talk, but i said "i already said what i had to say, you know what i feel for you and you know how much you mean to me, i came here to hear what you have to say...i didnt come here to change your mind about anything, i just wanna hear what you have to say" she basically said she doesnt like herself right now, every free time she has she wants to spend with me but she cant, bc she knows she has to be with her family too, she works all day and has no free time for herself. she said she just cant be in a relationship right now. she has no energy for it. ( i think shes getting depressed ). I asked her if she loves me...she said she doesnt konw, "how could i love you if i dont love myself right now" she also said that if she stayed in the relationship theres only one way it'll go...marriage. and that she wants to do more things b4 she settles down. she brought up the convo when she talked about kids with me. and she said she wasnt ready for that. I asked her, did you get scared about how serious this relationship was getting...she said yea...I told her i got scared too, but i didnt think it scared HER more than me...after all SHE was the one who said all those things what i dont understand is that SHE was the one who said all those things about being together forever, growing old together, having kids....and now she got scared about how serious it got. she told me she is an independent girl, she doesnt like being taken care...she likes to be spontaneous. she also said what we have is perfect...we are perfect together and that she feels so comfortable around me. I honestly think that she got scared of losing any freedom she has by committing to a relationship. i dont know what to think....does she love me? in the end she said "i want time to figure things out with myself" she was crying when she was telling me all this. i was calm and talked to her...trying to clear some stuff and i said that i could be there for her if she lets me. and if things were getting too serious, she shoulda let me know so we can take it slow! in the end, we went our separate ways and i said thanks for finally being honest with me. what should i think about all this??

• Answer:

  In spite of her age... and I don't even know either of your ages.... She's emotionally immature, and not ready for a commitment. Reading between the lines: She wants to have her cake & eat it too. She has a long list of "wants", but is not willing to "give". She needs to GROW UP. My advice to YOU, sir, is to move on. She might come to her senses in a year or two (or three...) and reach out to you sometime. But, maybe she will NEVER reach the maturity needed for an adult relationship. (she's CERTAINLY not ready for making a family. Babies? She'd do all but kill 'em.) If you find another love, another woman... you should go for it. Don't hold your breath waiting for this girl to wake up & grow up.