Is finding other guys attractive while in a relationship bad?

For guys who have ever TRULY loved a girl?

• I'm just wanting to know, if you really truly love a girl, like marriage love, if you would still find tons of other women attractive, not just pretty, but attractive (like wanting to be with other women, date them, have sex with them, even if you don't act on it but just think about it and consider it). Is that normal for a guy who really loves a girl? The details for why I am asking this is below. Have you ever loved someone so much that no one else really measures up to that person? I've been in a relationship for 4 years, I'm 21 and I was 17 when we started dating, I lost my virginity to him and he's the only guy ive ever had sex with. I love my boyfriend a lot. But that is the problem. I love him so much and he treats me like crap. He mentally cheated on me early on in the relationship and tried to get with my best friend. He ignores my needs. I need a lot of attention in a relationship. So I told him we needed to take a break after he did that to me. And I started talking to other guys. No matter how hard I try to like someone else I can't. The same guys who I was attracted to before my boyfriend, Im not attracted to at all anymore. I can only think of one person who I'd consider dating now besides my boyfriend. When I talk to guys, they flirt with me, and I know what to say back to them to make them think I like them, but I don't like them, and I'm basically lying to them, I just like the attention they're giving me. I don't know if I just have really high standards, or maybe I'm just super picky but i can't make myself be attracted to them. Anyways I was talking to my boyfriend, and I told him how no guy really matches up to him, and basically he's ruined my life because now I'm so picky. And then I start naming off girls and ask him if he'd ever consider dating them. And no effing joke I named off like 20 girls off the top of my head and he says he's attracted to like all of them and would date them. And I can't even make myself be attracted to that many guys that I know, I can only think of maybe one. Im so mad because basically I know what an A -hole my boyfriend is, but my life is ruined because I'm attracted to like almost no other guys because they don't match up to him. If that makes sense. Can anyone relate? It's like i love him so much with every part of me, I can't even find other guys attractive anymore. I mean I can but I'm VERY picky now. And I can name 20 girls off the top of my head and he is attracted to them all. Is this normal. I think I need to just completely break up with my boyfriend because I feel like I love him more than he could ever love me, and he's probably going to end up cheating on me one day. He says I'm crazy, and that it's normal for him to find other girls attractive, I say it would be fine if he thought they were just pretty, but he finds them ATTRACTIVE and would consider dating them (btw all the girls he said were attractive I thought were ugly which makes it even worse).. And it's not just a few girls, like throw a rock into a crowd of people and it will hit a girl who he would be with, its like he has no standards. It makes me feel bad about myself. He says that it's normal, but I think if you really love someone you won't find other people attractive ( you might find them good looking but you won't be attracted to them) Finding someone attractive means like you would want to date them and be with them and have sex with them.. I mean their is only one other guy besides my boyfriend who I find attractive, my boyfriend would basically give any girl who gave him the time of day a chance, and he'd probably have sex with them... I don't think that he loves me like he should, I don't think he knows what real love is.

• Answer:

  I love my wife more than anything else except maybe my daughter, but it's a different love.. I can accept my daughter being a princess, not my wife.