Child support, who does it really support and why is it being abused today so often?
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i believe that child support is used as a pawn and bargaining tool in our society in many cases. there are many women who abuse it in ways that are sickening. that part the cracks me up is when a woman gets mad when asked how it is spent. why get mad if you are using it on the child and not your new kids and/or man. there are many women that use it how it is suppose to be and not all women are bad with child support. i just do not understand why cs is used as a tool to fight your ex and become bitter just because he did not want you for whatever reason. why not be adults for the kids and come together as one and keep the courts out of your business? why should courts force anyone to pay a ridiculously assumed amount out of their income to support kids willingly or unwillingly? i just feel like people should not have kids before they are financially ready to care for them in my opinion. never have too many or any kids that you cannot support in the cases of death of the father, deadbeat, the father being in hiding, or just that does not want kids at all. you cannot force someone to do something that they do not willingly want to do in my opinion. many people may think that i am being too mean, harsh,unfair, or understanding; but this is the harsh truth of the matter when it comes to child support in society today in many people's opinion outside of my own. maybe with myself being raised by an independent and single mom, she taught me how to have kids with being financially stable first and independent of any man or government's help ever i seem to not see things that same as people that feel like they will not survive with no child support. i am married with one child and we both participate financially to our child. we always said that in the event of anything happening to any us in being absent rather leaving purposely or unintentionally, our child would be cared for in every way, no matter how many jobs it takes to do so. where are the people in the world who sees things like we do? are they hiding under a rock? lol
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Answer:
'Women are fininacially worse off than men after divorce, this is mostly due to the fact they look after their children. You seem to forget that it takes two to tango. Are you suggesting that mothers should just drop their kids on the fathers doorstep and forget about them? I mean why should the mother have to support her kids right? "why should courts force anyone to pay a ridiculously assumed amount out of their income to support kids willingly or unwillingly" Hard to answer because it is so obvious to me. It is called child abuse to neglect your child. Are you honestly suggesting that a mother could choose not to feed her children, or perhaps make them sleep in the backyard, or better still just let the loose to wander the streets. Do you think it is fair on any child to have to go without clothing, water, food etc. Or do you think there is some obligation for the parents to care for their own child. If there is an obligation, then why does it rest solely on the primary guardian, why can't the other person who is just as much responsible for the baby, also have a obligation to there child?
MrsE at Yahoo! Answers Visit the source
Other answers
Child support is supposed to go to the child/children, but if the parent who is receiving the check is no good, that money might be spent elsewhere. I think it's crazy for a man to be paying $500 for child support and the child only gets half of that money, while their mother uses the rest to fund her shoe collection or something. That's the screwed up system though. People need to be more careful with who they chose to have their kids with. As for being financially stable before you have kids, that's great and all, but accepting money from your child's father isn't a hand out, as the child is his responsibility too, so he should contribute as well, even if you can care for your child by yourself. The extra money could help the child out somehow. College fund?
Jessica
you are a fool and a bigot
princessblaise39
Oh, don't be ridiculous. It costs about £18 000 per year to bring up one child. Every child is entitled to a life that is emotionally and financially stable. And no child should be deprived because one parent doesn't want to pay towards the upkeep of his or her child. What do mothers do with child support - as a single mother I can tell you. It went towards the rent - I needed a bigger house than I would have had as a single person (I lived in a flat before I married). It went on increased grocery bills, electricity, heating. It went on clothing, furniture, medical bills. It went on school uniforms, school trips, outings. So of course the paltry sum that my ex husband paid towards his children's support nowhere near covered it. I had to work too, and I did, at horrible hours so that I could also be at home for my children. I paid for childcare, too. Oh, did I mention that I held down two jobs? I wonder if your husband or partner pays child support? Which would explain your bitterness. Most people understand why both parents provide for their children.
Pieris
My mom was a single woman try a raise two kids. My dad refused to pay child support. My mom died of a heart attack so now I'm stuck with bitchy slut and a man who lOves his car more than his kids
Lauren
Wow, I SO totally agree with you - how some women today abuse the support they get from their ex. My bf has an ex who COMPLETELY abuses the child support he sends her every month. Every time they talk, she's always got a "new this" or a "new that" or she's planning on buying something she clearly cannot afford (for example, a $500 birthday party for her 8-yr-old!)...YET, she bitches and moans when she can't make her rent or pay her bills or buy groceries - AND of course, it's always HIS fault that her cheque didn't come in on time (when there's a long holiday weekend!). UGH! As a single mother of 3 young kids, shouldn't SHE have to take responsibility to make sure that she CAN pay all her bills??? And she DOES use the kids as pawns to get back at my bf (ex. "Your kids have nothing to eat over here"). And NOW (somewhat off topic), since her 9-yr-old son has been diagnosed with ADHD, she told my bf that she's going to try to get more money out of the gov't to "help with the expenses of his medication", which is fine and all, but we both know what THAT money is going towards. And she wants to have her 8-yr-old assessed for ADHD now (to see how much more she can get!). It's completely disgusting what she does. And as you've stated early on in your question, she DOES get mad when he asks where the money is going - well, we have to wonder when the kids come over in t-shirts that have holes in them and practically threadbare coats and starving to death! And also, it doesn't help that his ex is one of those really vindictive ones who bad mouths us to the kids, so the kids only see things her way (whether it's right or wrong). I truly commend your mother for trying to raise you right - I DO understand how hard it must be for a single mother, and YES, there ARE single mothers out there who DO do right by their kids - it's just these low-class cases that make everyone else look bad. People can have their opinions, but until they are IN this situation, they really don't know. And yes, I COULD mind my own business, but I'm in this relationship with this man and everything that HE goes through, I go through. We're a team and we work through things TOGETHER. And FYI, we've TRIED getting custody of the kids, but she just lies (and gets her family/friends to lie) to the courts saying that WE'RE the ones who are unfit.
LC76
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