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How do i host a perfect house party?

If you were invited to a co-workers house for a party, would you expect the host to provide the food?

  • Last summer, I was invited to a co-workers house for a picnic. I arrived and saw food laid out on a table. Assuming it was there for the taking, I dove right in. Fifteen seconds later, I heard an angry voice behind me: "What do you think you're doing?" I turned to see my co-worker standing there with a scowl on her face. I replied that I was getting some food to eat. She responded, "Well, that food is for me and MY family. Where is YOUR food?" Apparently I was expected to bring my own eats, but this was not made clear to be in the invitation, which I pointed out to co-worker. She said incredulously, "You're invited and you can use the grill, but did you think I was going to feed you, too?" I've been to other social occasions and the host always provided the refreshments, or specified that everyone had to bring a dish to share. I never thought to ask the co-worker what the arrangements were. I can see if someone wanted beer or wine to drink, they would have to bring it (e.g. BYOB). It was embarrassing for me. I had to leave. It was that or stay and watch my co-worker and her family eat. In this situation, who was at fault - me for not understanding the conditions of the invitation or the co-worker for assuming I understood the situation?

  • Answer:

    As usual, Spindrift is right. That is inexcusable. If a host had said that to me, I would have thought she was joking because that would have been simply unheard of. First to invite people over and only provide food for some and expect you to assume this or read her mind, then to speak to you so rudely and openly, and embarrass you, when you were acting normally! Accept no more invites from this wack job, and try to avoid her at work whenever possible. You did the right thing by leaving. Her arrangement is not normal, and is very rude and unacceptable. A host either provides food, or specifies that the event is potluck. But it would still be rude to tell guests that food will only be provided for family and everyone else must bring their own. What an oaf.

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Your co worker has a screw loose, she is deranged and rude as well, that was inexcusable and the host always provides food and never expects you to come over to use their grill, you need to avoid her completely and of course, never accept any more invitations from her, she is nuts.

Spindrift

Your co worker has a screw loose, she is deranged and rude as well, that was inexcusable and the host always provides food and never expects you to come over to use their grill, you need to avoid her completely and of course, never accept any more invitations from her, she is nuts.

Spindrift

If this is a true story, it's still incredulous. I've never heard of anyone throwing a party and making the guests bring their own food without telling them beforehand. The co-workers attitude is also rude and insensitive. If it were me, I wouldn't go there again! She sounds like a nut job.

Duffer McDivott

If this is a true story, it's still incredulous. I've never heard of anyone throwing a party and making the guests bring their own food without telling them beforehand. The co-workers attitude is also rude and insensitive. If it were me, I wouldn't go there again! She sounds like a nut job.

Duffer McDivott

Your coworker should have specified on the invitation. If I invite people over for a picnic it's either provide the food or let people know that it's a pot luck and they should bring a dish. It was very rude of her to assume that you would bring your own food.

shenzara

Your coworker should have specified on the invitation. If I invite people over for a picnic it's either provide the food or let people know that it's a pot luck and they should bring a dish. It was very rude of her to assume that you would bring your own food.

shenzara

Wow, that's a new one on me. How would that even BE a party? She was wrong, and I hope you don't attend any more of her "parties". What a nutjob!

mrs_g

She was at fault, how rude of her! I have never been to a "party" like that. When I go to my Aunts for her annual summer party, they even provide all the drinks! Meat is included too. She will ask close family "please bring a dessert" or a salad or something, but she has always always provided everything else! I don't blame you for leaving, that was a horrible thing for her, the hostess, to do and you were right to call her on it. Did other people know to bring their own food? Were there other people there even?

stellacarina02

She was at fault, how rude of her! I have never been to a "party" like that. When I go to my Aunts for her annual summer party, they even provide all the drinks! Meat is included too. She will ask close family "please bring a dessert" or a salad or something, but she has always always provided everything else! I don't blame you for leaving, that was a horrible thing for her, the hostess, to do and you were right to call her on it. Did other people know to bring their own food? Were there other people there even?

stellacarina02

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