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Why do I have problems with texting through yahoo?

When is texting cheating and why does HE text me?

  • Okay, here's the deal...Yahoo answers....I'm in love with someone I shouldn't be. I've known him more than half of my life and I can't help it. I got over him once when he moved away but I never really got him out of my system. He recently, less than a year ago came back into my life but he's taken. It's been very painful but I have tried over and over to stop texting him and I even told him that I had/have feelings for him and HE still texts me. I will admit, I enjoy our conversations that are never sexual in content. We are friends. We don't even live in the same city and I've seen him once, very recently and reluctantly a few weeks ago at my brothers wedding. First time in 6 years. I have never been so nervous in my life. I couldn't even sleep and cried twice just knowing I was going to see him ...... and his beautiful new wife. I felt guilty and I stayed as far away as possible from them. WHY DOES HE KEEP TEXTING ME? We were best friends along time ago and like I said we don't flirt when we text but it does feel wrong knowing hes taken. I have loved him longer than he known is wife but I never told him how I felt until it was too late really. I don't know what to do? It's hard to think what my life what be like without him again. I have always loved him but I do respect his vows but sometimes I wonder if hes so happy why does he continued to talk to me. I actually came to a point before our reunion that after we met, again I was done hurting myself and allowing him to give me false hope but..... we still text. I just read a bunch of articles about where the the line is with cheating and texting and I feel awful. He tells me personal things but only because I have the same problems with depression and anxiety, I think its easier to talk to someone who could relate. Should stop talking to the only man I've ever loved?

  • Answer:

    You can't change him but you can change yourself. You'll never be able to meet anyone else as long as you keep him on your mind and in your heart. It's not fair to you and he is playing with fire. He may even be stringing other girls along too, besides you. Even if he isn't, he still should not be contacting you. I guess he thinks you are "safe." He sounds like someone who has a great big EGO. And gratifying his ego is of utmost importance. There is a saying... "One man cannot meet all the needs of one woman, and one woman cannot meet all the needs of one man, only God can meet all your needs. So, even though a couple may seem to be happily married, still, each one has needs that the other can't fully satisfy. But both of them have committed themselves to the r/s and they are trying to make the best of it. Or at least "one" of them is. In most marriages, one of the partners "give" more than the other does.

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It sounds as if he has never been -- and is not now -- aware of your romantic (as opposed to platonic) love feelings for him. If his texts aren't covertly or explicitly sexual, then he's quite possibly treating you as the long term "friend" he has known for ages. He is talking to you as a FRIEND, no more or less. If the continued contact upsets you -- and it sounds like it does -- maybe it's best to gently break off contact. If he asks why, tell him he needs to be talking about the personal stuff with his wife and that you're uncomfortable being friends with a married man.

pat z

It sounds as if he has never been -- and is not now -- aware of your romantic (as opposed to platonic) love feelings for him. If his texts aren't covertly or explicitly sexual, then he's quite possibly treating you as the long term "friend" he has known for ages. He is talking to you as a FRIEND, no more or less. If the continued contact upsets you -- and it sounds like it does -- maybe it's best to gently break off contact. If he asks why, tell him he needs to be talking about the personal stuff with his wife and that you're uncomfortable being friends with a married man.

pat z

You can't change him but you can change yourself. You'll never be able to meet anyone else as long as you keep him on your mind and in your heart. It's not fair to you and he is playing with fire. He may even be stringing other girls along too, besides you. Even if he isn't, he still should not be contacting you. I guess he thinks you are "safe." He sounds like someone who has a great big EGO. And gratifying his ego is of utmost importance. There is a saying... "One man cannot meet all the needs of one woman, and one woman cannot meet all the needs of one man, only God can meet all your needs. So, even though a couple may seem to be happily married, still, each one has needs that the other can't fully satisfy. But both of them have committed themselves to the r/s and they are trying to make the best of it. Or at least "one" of them is. In most marriages, one of the partners "give" more than the other does.

wildflow...

Whether or not this man is happy is irrelevant. He's married and you know that; so you need to stop playing this game with him. He keeps texting you because you keep texting him back. STOP TEXTING HIM BACK. If he wants to talk to someone, LET HIM TALK TO HIS WIFE!

High Roller

Whether or not this man is happy is irrelevant. He's married and you know that; so you need to stop playing this game with him. He keeps texting you because you keep texting him back. STOP TEXTING HIM BACK. If he wants to talk to someone, LET HIM TALK TO HIS WIFE!

High Roller

It does cross the lines that if it is not something you would do in front of your spouse, then don't do it. Realize that if HE loved you, then he would NOT have married another woman. That should tell you that you will always be not more then a text buddie so stop answering his text messages and move on.

E&L

Is it wrong? Yes, he's married and you "never really got him out of my system...I couldn't even sleep and cried twice just knowing I was going to see him ...I felt guilty...it does feel wrong knowing hes taken...I have loved him... but I never told him how I felt... It's hard to think what my life what be like without him again...I just read a bunch of articles about where the the line is with cheating and texting and I feel awful...He tells me personal things..." all of which adds up to one of two things - a painful and unfulfilling relationship from your side, or the open door to the possibility of cheating, which I don't think you'd be happy with either. "Should stop talking to the only man I've ever loved?" The answer is yes. Sorry but anything else will lead to further pain.

Barb Outhere

Is it wrong? Yes, he's married and you "never really got him out of my system...I couldn't even sleep and cried twice just knowing I was going to see him ...I felt guilty...it does feel wrong knowing hes taken...I have loved him... but I never told him how I felt... It's hard to think what my life what be like without him again...I just read a bunch of articles about where the the line is with cheating and texting and I feel awful...He tells me personal things..." all of which adds up to one of two things - a painful and unfulfilling relationship from your side, or the open door to the possibility of cheating, which I don't think you'd be happy with either. "Should stop talking to the only man I've ever loved?" The answer is yes. Sorry but anything else will lead to further pain.

Barb Outhere

It does cross the lines that if it is not something you would do in front of your spouse, then don't do it. Realize that if HE loved you, then he would NOT have married another woman. That should tell you that you will always be not more then a text buddie so stop answering his text messages and move on.

E&L

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