Help with outline for research paper.

Help on 9/11 thesis statement and outline for research paper?

• I need help with my thesis statement and outline. I'm going for a heroism outlook of 9/11. My current thesis is, "If it was not for heroes and communities coming together, there would be many people living after the 9/11 attack in New York." Can someone help me on a better thesis dealing with heroism. My teacher said it was a poorly made thesis and got a 10/30 for it. For my outline after creating the thesis. I. Introduction (What should be discussed in the introduction?) II. III. IV. V. Conclusion I do not really know what to talk about in between the conclusion and introduction. All help is much appreciated. [:

• Answer:

  im not sure if this is what your looking for but maybe something along the lines of "being a hero isn't about wearing a cape and a mask to save a damsel in distress from danger. Its an everyday person preforming selfless acts for others out of the goodness of their hearts such as those who help save many lives during 9/11" i think it sounds more like a opening sentence to a speech but its something. -for the intro, open up with maybe defining what a hero is in your opinion or the populations. go on and bring up heroes during 9/11. state your thesis statement. -for the first point, maybe do a brief little summery (2-3 sentences) on what 9/11 was (most people know but still). bring up how people helped like saving people from wreckage and so on. name 2 or 3. explain a bit. -I think for another point, you should do a story of someone who helped save lives during 9/11. -im not sure for the last point -for the conclusion, summarize what you said during the other 3 paragraphs and end it with a statement that will close the piece nicely like " Everyone is a hero in their own way even if they think they are too weak and powerless. Everyday people came together in a time in dire need and made a huge impact on the outcome of 9/11" -if this is any help, my teacher showed my class this video when i was in grade 7. it may give you a few ideas. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KYtm8uEo5vU hope this helps a bit!