Traditional Wedding or Cruise/Island Wedding?

If you have a traditional wedding, it doesn't have to be your parents paying for it. I'm assuming you and your fiance are adults. You could pay for your own wedding...or at least a good portion of it. It's your guys' responsibility, not your parents'. That out of the way... Will you regret not having extended family there for the ceremony? This seems to be a big hang up for some brides. They don't have all the money they want for a "traditional" big wedding so they jump the gun and go to the courthouse or elope in some other way thinking, "I just want to be married already." But then after a couple months, they regret doing things that way and they decide that they will have this big wedding redo so everybody can come. Which is not okay. You have one wedding. So will you regret having a wedding with just you, your fiance and your daughter? Really think about it. If not...then go for the destination wedding and a wedding celebration (not a reception) at home afterwards (remember...it holds none of the trappings of a wedding). But if you will regret it, then start saving your own money and have a small, intimate ceremony at home with a few extended family members.

If you think you might regret not having a big wedding, why don't you pay for the wedding yourselves? just a thought. Anyways, i would do the cruise wedding and then have a party ( not a reception) when you get back.

First, why aren't you paying for your own wedding? And also, why is the choice between a pricy cruise and a pricy big wedding? All I know is that if I had accepted help from my parents when I got married, and they weren't rich, it wouldn't even occur to me to then have the wedding in a place they couldn't afford to be there! Ouch. On your reception idea, please realize that this is not a substitute for attending a wedding ceremony and watching the couple exchange vows. In fact, it's not a reception at all. When you get back from your honeymoon, you're a married couple and all wedding related events are done. You could throw a party, I guess, but that seems like a waste of money. And it's also rude to use the party as a way to show videos of the main event the guests missed. Ouch again. If it was me, I'd put together a budget, use part of it for a cruise as a honeymoon, and then take what's left and have a small wedding where the people who matter most to me get to see the biggest moment of my life. You can easily put together a small backyard wedding in a couple months.

A cruise wedding can be surprisingly affordable. Choosing to be married on a cruise ship is one way to combine many wedding and honeymoon expenses into one lump sum. Another advantage of a cruise wedding is that much of the planning and stress can be removed from the bride, groom and their families. This is because when you purchase a wedding package, you are also purchasing the services of an event planner who will be responsible for the majority of the details of the wedding. Learn how to plan a cruise wedding to see if this is an option for you. Think about what you want in a cruise wedding. Decide whether you want a destination wedding that occurs during the cruise, or a ceremony that occurs at port before the cruise begins. Also determine where you want to travel on your cruise. There are many destinations, including the the Mediterranean, Alaska, Europe, the Pacific Islands and the Caribbean. Allow at least three months for planning and executing all of the details necessary for the event. Contact the cruise lines that serve the destination and find out what kind of packages they offer. Typically, cruise lines will offer several different packages of varying prices. The least expensive package would most likely be to have a ceremony at the cruise harbor before the cruise. The most expensive package would likely be getting married during the cruise. A benefit of planning a cruise wedding is that the packages are usually all-inclusive. This means that they include an event planner, flowers, decorations, cake, food, beverages, music and a photographer. Many packages can also include formal wear rental. Find out if the cruise line has a ceremony officiant available or if you have to supply an officiant. Choose a date and book the event with the cruise line of your choice. Choose the package that has the services and options that you want and can afford. Pay any deposits necessary and sign any contracts that are required by the cruise line. Tell friends and family what you are planning as soon as possible so that they will be more likely to attend the wedding. If the ceremony will be at a cruise port or during the cruise, and passports will be necessary, make sure that you and all of your guests have their official passports and paperwork in order. Find out what is necessary for a wedding license. Most cruise lines require that the wedding couple be responsible for obtaining a wedding license, but for an extra fee its services may include obtaining your wedding license. Apply for the wedding license within the necessary time frame so that you will have it in a timely fashion. The cruise line will be able to guide you through this process. Consider setting up a cruise registry to help defray wedding expenses. If finances are tight, this may be an option to help you pay for your wedding cruise. With a cruise registry, your guests can choose to give you money in an account that will pay for cruise wedding expenses as their wedding gift to you. Find out how the invitations will be handled by the event planner. Make sure the planner has a complete guest list in a timely fashion. If you are responsible for invitations, choose and order the invitations and send them out six to eight weeks before the ceremony. Decide how formal the wedding will be. If it will be a formal affair, with tuxedos and a wedding gown, arrange for any rentals (if necessary) and choose and purchase the gown and accessories. Take care of any details that are associated with the wedding package you selected. Make any decisions concerning flowers, food, photography and music that must be made. Make sure that the event planner is aware of any special concerns or desires that you have. Communicate clearly and thoroughly with the event planner regularly to make sure that there are no surprises. Make sure that the event planner knows the guest list numbers as this develops. Make any final payments when they are due and confirm, in writing, with the event planner two weeks before the ceremony that all of the details are taken care of. Read more: How to Plan a Cruise Wedding http://best-cruise-deals.co.uk

Cheryl, You have things a bit mixed up in my opinion. #1 -- in today's day and age, the bride and groom are responsible for paying for the wedding, reception, and honeymoon. NOT your parents. If they want to contribute, fine. If not, fine also. #2 -- why are you limiting yourself to a cruise or a huge wedding? There is a middle ground. AND, having a "big reception for everyone" when you get back will not save you any money! I'm sure you realize that it's the "reception" portion of any wedding where the costs come in (food, beverages, venue, music, etc.). The actual ceremony portion is low cost usually. #3 -- I would choose a small wedding where you live with only closest family and friends invited (saves lots of money by limiting the guest list), THEN go on a nice cruise for your honeymoon!

I am totally agreed with your ideas that there is no need to put your parents under the burden of debt. It is really a good idea that after your marriage you can through a good party.

First, why aren't you paying for your own wedding? And also, why is the choice between a pricy cruise and a pricy big wedding? All I know is that if I had accepted help from my parents when I got married, and they weren't rich, it wouldn't even occur to me to then have the wedding in a place they couldn't afford to be there! Ouch. On your reception idea, please realize that this is not a substitute for attending a wedding ceremony and watching the couple exchange vows. In fact, it's not a reception at all. When you get back from your honeymoon, you're a married couple and all wedding related events are done. You could throw a party, I guess, but that seems like a waste of money. And it's also rude to use the party as a way to show videos of the main event the guests missed. Ouch again. If it was me, I'd put together a budget, use part of it for a cruise as a honeymoon, and then take what's left and have a small wedding where the people who matter most to me get to see the biggest moment of my life. You can easily put together a small backyard wedding in a couple months.

Cheryl, You have things a bit mixed up in my opinion. #1 -- in today's day and age, the bride and groom are responsible for paying for the wedding, reception, and honeymoon. NOT your parents. If they want to contribute, fine. If not, fine also. #2 -- why are you limiting yourself to a cruise or a huge wedding? There is a middle ground. AND, having a "big reception for everyone" when you get back will not save you any money! I'm sure you realize that it's the "reception" portion of any wedding where the costs come in (food, beverages, venue, music, etc.). The actual ceremony portion is low cost usually. #3 -- I would choose a small wedding where you live with only closest family and friends invited (saves lots of money by limiting the guest list), THEN go on a nice cruise for your honeymoon!

If you absolutely have no money for a wedding, this is a good option. However, you could also have a small ceremony with your close friends and relatives for cheap. My fiance and I talked about eloping in an effort to save money and to get married sooner (been engaged for two years). However, we both decided it would be unfair to leave out our family and friends so now we are having a full on wedding with 80+ guests. I'm SO happy we didn't elope. I have to say that besides the money we are spending, I am very excited about walking down the isle in my beautiful dress and spending the day celebrating with all my favorite people. It just depends on what is important to you. If you want a wedding but can't afford it, can you wait and save some money? You can have a nice affordable wedding if you keep the guest list down. If you don't care then there is nothing wrong with going to the courthouse. You could always renew your vows later. I was never one of those girls that dreamed about my wedding and would have been okay with eloping, but planning my own wedding and seeing things come together is so exciting! Trying on dresses and getting shipments with wedding stuff is so exciting. Even putting together the invitations was fun. It's been an experience my fiance and I have enjoyed (for the most part). It may just be one day, but I will have memories and pictures to remember it by.