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What can a parent do when they need a lawyer but cannot afford one? Difference of getting child back or not?

  • I apologize for the long story but I really need some advice. A friend of mine is going through some issues and I am trying to figure out ways to help. To make a long story short, her 12 year old son inappropriately touched her 7 year old son last weekend. She immediately contacted their dad (ex husband) and the 7 year old spent the weekend with him to keep them separated. They set up an appointment for both of them with a therapist, per the 12 year old's current therapist's recommendation, and that is when my sister received a call from the sheriff letting her know that there is a protection order against not only the 12 year old but against her as well. She is not allowed to be within 1,000 feet of or try to contact her ex husband or their son in any way, shape or form until the hearing next week. She found a lawyer who will help but needs $500 up front (in 2 days) and she does not have that kind of money. Her ex husband has a lawyer and she said she would feel safer if she had one too but I've never been in this type of situation so I have no idea what is best. My main questions are: If she did nothing wrong, why is there a protection order against her? There is a possibility of her ex husband lying, and even getting their son to lie, so it will be his word against hers. Also, will her not having a lawyer hurt her and change the chances of her getting her son back?

  • Answer:

    I'm not 100% sure on why the attorney would have filed a protective order against her as well...unless they don't like how she handled things, OR, they worry that the 7-year-old is traumatized right now, and because the 12-year-old is with mom, they just don't want there to be any issues before the hearing (it may just be precautionary, until a judge can decide). It is best that the kids are separated right now, even though I'm sure this is all very painful for everyone involved. Mom needs an attorney...now is the time to beg and borrow money from anywhere she can get it...right now. Even if it means a cash advance from one of those completely ridiculous interest rate kinds of places (one of them actually called "Cash Advance") or even a title loan on her car if she has a title. Just getting $100 here and there from anyone who can help, would be her best bet, because she absolutely needs to have an attorney for this. She may also want to consider asking the judge (with or without her attorney) whether they could have CASA (court appointed special advocates for children) or other agency that represents the child, be present before the hearing continues and serious decisions are made on the child's behalf. Regardless, she also needs her own attorney. She could look into legal aid in her area (you could help her with this by searching the area online for legal aid for low income families...because her time is very limited). In my area, there is an agency that helps with this type of situation, pro bono, for anyone who can't afford the legal cost...she would need to get in touch with them "immediately". If she does not have time to get an attorney worked out, then when she goes into court, she should request an extension on the hearing from the judge, so that she can find one (the judge does not have to grant this, but may).

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I'm not 100% sure on why the attorney would have filed a protective order against her as well...unless they don't like how she handled things, OR, they worry that the 7-year-old is traumatized right now, and because the 12-year-old is with mom, they just don't want there to be any issues before the hearing (it may just be precautionary, until a judge can decide). It is best that the kids are separated right now, even though I'm sure this is all very painful for everyone involved. Mom needs an attorney...now is the time to beg and borrow money from anywhere she can get it...right now. Even if it means a cash advance from one of those completely ridiculous interest rate kinds of places (one of them actually called "Cash Advance") or even a title loan on her car if she has a title. Just getting $100 here and there from anyone who can help, would be her best bet, because she absolutely needs to have an attorney for this. She may also want to consider asking the judge (with or without her attorney) whether they could have CASA (court appointed special advocates for children) or other agency that represents the child, be present before the hearing continues and serious decisions are made on the child's behalf. Regardless, she also needs her own attorney. She could look into legal aid in her area (you could help her with this by searching the area online for legal aid for low income families...because her time is very limited). In my area, there is an agency that helps with this type of situation, pro bono, for anyone who can't afford the legal cost...she would need to get in touch with them "immediately". If she does not have time to get an attorney worked out, then when she goes into court, she should request an extension on the hearing from the judge, so that she can find one (the judge does not have to grant this, but may).

Sarah

Someone is lying about her a friend of mine had a retraining order against him because his wife lied ,she needed the tro so she could visit her new man in jail and would,nt have to drive their child ,to the fathers home so she could take the child with her to the prison..Well she lost custody when the judge found out what she was doing .You can try pro se but make sure you get all your ducks in a row before she presents herself. good luck

BJ

Someone is lying about her a friend of mine had a retraining order against him because his wife lied ,she needed the tro so she could visit her new man in jail and would,nt have to drive their child ,to the fathers home so she could take the child with her to the prison..Well she lost custody when the judge found out what she was doing .You can try pro se but make sure you get all your ducks in a row before she presents herself. good luck

BJ

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