I fell in love with my husband because he was always affectionate and understanding.. he made me feel special and valuable. I love him, but i dont feel in love anymore. he doesnt do those things anymore and makes no effort to.. what should i do now?

If you want to "save" your marriage you should both go to a marriage counselor. If you can't get your husband to go with you then you should start going yourself. Be sure to ask the counselor whether he has a bias towards saving marriages or if he is willing to let let weak marriages fall apart. Remember this,however: it is not your husband's job to make you feel special. You must learn to feel special yourself.Your ego cannot be built up by another person, whether or not he is your husband. There is no reason for you to think that you can cure this problem yourself. Get professional help. -- And by the way, make sure that it is experienced, professional help. Usually ministers or rabbis who try to fix marriages never get to the real problems. Problems cannot be suppressed. They must be dealt with. See a professional.

Well, my first question is: are you doing those things for him? Most men seem to give what they get, maybe because they know you value it enough to do it, maybe because it keeps their tank full so that they have something to give back. So start by assessing how much affection and understanding you are giving him. Secondly, it looks from your picture like you have a baby. That takes a lot out of couple time. You are probably both exhausted, which means you both need more affection and understanding right now and have less affection and understanding to give. You need to schedule some couple time. If you have the money to hire a sitter and schedule a night out, great. If you don't, try to find an understanding friend or relative who can take the little one for a few hours. Even if you just cook a meal together at home, with the use of a free babysitter, you need time to be together as a couple and reconnect. Maybe you can swap out with a friend in the same situation: you babysit for them to have datenight on Friday and they reciprocate on Saturday. The best gift you can give your child is to stay in love with their other parent. I know that advice is so standard that its cliched, but you need time to talk to each other without interruption to keep that affection alive. You can't talk over a baby crying and you can't talk while someone has a hold on your sleeve and is yelling: MOMMY! MOMMY! MOMMY! Thirdly, understand that there is a natural progression in every marriage. No body could withstand the strain of new love. It wouldn't be healthy. And no, I'm not talking about sex. That early stage of excitement when you can't eat and you can't sleep for thinking about your loved one would burn you up. Eventually, love settles into a deep and abiding affection and that is okay. There is a sweetness with that stage that isn't there in the early excitement.

time for the old heart to heart talk.

The novelty period has come and gone, and now it requires both of you proactively working this. 5 Love Languages Gary Chapman. He stopped communicating in the way you like to be loved, and now your meter is low. He needs to be re-sensitized to this. Do either of you go to church? There IS help, there are solutions, and it is possible to make marriage last happily the rest of your life. I empathize with you!

first thing is communication, don't expect him to be a mind reader. Talk to him like the other people said do not accuse him or tell him hes changed cause I am sure there maybe somethings he can say about you.. its a group effort and team. don't want to start pointing fingers.. maybe mention hey lets go on a trip and go where we met or first kissed. be honest with him how you feel don't use the word you or me say we we've, us so its not saying its one person. Your in the comfertable stage wih each other.. you have to spice it up..

First think if there are any things that you may do differently... do you still get all dolled up for him? and other little things you did when you were first together? Ask him if he feels like you are as affectionate and understanding as when you were first together? Tell him ways the ways that made you feel special and valuable and essentially fall in love with him. Tell him you want to feel that way more now. Basically he will respond more positively if you bring it up in a non accusing way. Don't say, you changed. You don't show me how you love me anymore. Instead be specific in telling him how you fell in love with him. Give detailed examples of things that drove you crazy. So he can do those same things again to make you feel as special as you did before : )

Have an affair with a discrete cab driver, it may spice up your life and show you what is missing. Plus a free ride anywhere you want.

Find out why he stopped, there must be a reason. That happens in all relationships and you have a choice either find a way to bring it to another level and grow together, let it die or just live with it. Relationships take work and so many people get into a rut and do not want to work at their lives. They are happy to just let it go on as usual... Find out why and fix it. Is it you? Him? Maybe he's just not happy with his life or himself. Maybe he feels like he's a failure, or even you are not the same person he married.

You can either talk to him and find ways to improve your relationship .... or .... End the relationship any number of ways and wind up feeling the exact same way about the next guy in a few more years.