What did you do to get over a break-up?

How can I get my girlfriend back after a marriage breakup, when I've already apologized to her and her parents?

  • I am from India and recently had a marriage breakup (rokka breakup). I really liked the girl but there were family, career and distance issues which caused it. I am trying to get her back and I have apologized a number of times to her and her parents. Need an advice on this? Her brother got really annoyed, and even threatened police action against me and my folks are scared, but still I am determined to get her back since I consider her as my soulmate. Can someone give an advise on this?

  • Answer:

    I suppose the issues were from your end. If that's the case the girl and her family have lost trust in you. Maybe they would be looking for other matches. At this point I don't think you have a right to try getting back to her. On the other hand if the girl feels the same for you as she did before and wants to be with you, you both will have to work together and get her parents agree on this. Honestly if you both believe you are soulmates then a broken Roka should not be a hindrance. All the best : )

Roopesh Ojha at Quora Visit the source

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Other answers

Consider two parts of equation, the girl and her parents. If none of the two want you anymore, I think it's best that you salvage some respect and stop trying after getting repeated rejections. Threats of police action show that the parents are irate with you. If the girl has also made it clear that she doesnt want it anymore, then you should let go. Despite all this, if you still want her, just ask her in a very respectable manner in finality. Let her know that it's her last chance too. Tell her that going away from her only reassured you that you want her. This I think is your best shot. Let her choose. You might want to wait for a week or so before you finally do it so that she can settle down from all the mess that preceded this all. Hope this helps. Pray you get her. Cheers mate.

Akash Goel

Thanks for A2A. Since I'm not married and don't have such relationship yet, I can not give proper answer. I don't know if yours is such family or not, but we don't consider such type of break-ups that much serious. Now, you say you 'liked' the girl. What about the girl? I mean was she also that much into it? Family issues can be solved, distance issues are not even serious but career matters. Now I don't know if it was your side that had such problem or hers. Why you needed to apologize? Her brother is likely to get annoyed if they really don't want any kind of relationship with you. Ask the girl about the main reason, and check to see if you can do anything about it. Even 'soulmates' get apart so this is not the proper reason. Do what you can best but I don't see much future in this. They simply don't want you, you can have better girl and she can be a better soulmate for you. I'd advise you to move ahead, you can have better future and better wife. :)

Rutul Parikh

dear friend, since all of their parents are opposing you! what did you do to them ... because they are so hurt..?  If you asked for forgiveness.. they may not be convinced.. it all depends on what's your behavior impacted them! what can I advice is 1. Talk with your girl friend.. know the situation and why they are upset. As other suggested.. try to talk with her at least once.      if she is also interested to marry you.. then try to resolve the problem  whether you or they created.. by taking elders help. 2. If she is not interested .. try to convince her. If she is not ready then you can wait for some more time.. or wish her a better future and you find a new girl and marry. It is very difficult to convince someone... if their parents agree also ... that could be a force way.. and you may face many issues after marriage.. you are telling they may file FIR. why you take such a risk.  if after marriage if some thing happen .. they file FIR and force you to give divorce. instead of that try above (1) and (2). Note: we are not going to live 1000 years .. dont waste time and energy ...Give love those who give back.. care those who care you....

Gururaja Bhari Onkareshwara

I wont be able to give you an advice coz I am just 19 and dont have any kind of encounter with such a thing but yes I can give my point of view......... First of all rokka breakup is not a thing that would tamper the reputation of family (which is said to happen in india)..........and if police complaints are made against you then please u should consider the whole situation again and think that what u r doing is absolutely right or not...........if you find any percent of negativity then you should leave it and try for other match and if your ans is 100% yes then to congrats man u r in love ............and dont give up on her........

Mohak Garg

You haven't got married and started getting police complaints from their side? Do you even have any idea what this means? Do you have any damn idea how biased are the laws of our country? Do you know that if somehow you got married and she (or her parents) made a police complain (a fake one) and got an FIR issued you and your family may land in jail and won't even get bail really soon? In the matter of heart don't ignore your brain my friend. Think properly about all aspects. Don't start accusing me of being someone who believes that guy should have upper hand and what not, but if you think they are over reacting by getting annoyed for no reason then you shouldn't beg for their mercy and seek useless apologies. I am not generalising but some girls and their parents love to see the groom staying like this and follow what they say. Unfortunately I realised this too late and thus my life and career are suffering a roadblock due to my divorce and couple of other cases according to which I have done some grave offence. My words might be little crude and rough but trust me I'm trying to help you. I am having a different perspective as compared to regular people here so some may find my answer a little extreme too.

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