What is it like being an occupational therapist?

What do you do if a friend of yours treats you like her therapist? And what do you do if she becomes clingy?

• I want to withdraw slowly. But she simply does not get it. What complicates this is that she is my housemate, and I cannot simply leave and not see her. The first time I told her that we talked about her issues, I'm not her therapist, that she mistook about our relationship, and that she should seek a professional for help. She got defensive, and for a week after that, she seemed upset, and argued with me for remind her cleaning the sink. Then in the last 3 weeks, she started begin to become overtly friendly (never happened before), and I can guess that she thinks I was upset just for a while, and she wanted to continue to see me as a therapist. What should I do now?  Can I write something like the following to her: Dear friend, It takes me a long time and consideration, to write this. For weeks, you have been behave me in certain ways that I feel you are treating me like your therapist. Conversation with you in the past month has been leaving me extremely uncomfortable and agitated. To be fair to you, I have to be absolutely clear that I am not your therapist. I wish you can stop trying to engage me in a conversation. This makes me afraid to be around you.

• Answer:

  I don't think you need to put it into a letter.  I understand that you might be uncomfortable expressing how you feel; but putting something in writing can be harsh, and make it more painful to her than you might intend.  Consider how you would feel if someone wrote a letter like that, to you.  For me, I would be ashamed, embarrassed, and think that the person who'd sent me that letter lacked courage, and wasn't ever a friend to begin with. If you are in a position where you will have a continuing relationship with her, you shouldn't try to hide from her. You can set boundaries more clearly by telling her directly how you feel.  The next time she starts talking about issues that you are uncomfortable with, say "look, we've talked about this before.  I'm not comfortable having these sorts of conversations with you anymore, and I'm worried about you.  I think you should consult a professional, like a therapist, and talk with them about it.  I can help you find some people who might be able to help, but I'm not a professional and I don't think this conversation is appropriate, because it makes me feel uncomfortable.  If you start up on these topics again with me, I'm going to walk away or change the subject.  Please don't."  If she continues, walk away or change the subject. Or gently remind her: "we talked about this, and you know I am not the one you should be talking with about this."  Just say no.  She will get the message.