What is the best option for a young gay man who is also a devout Jehovah's Witness?

If one's faith utterly contradicts the life one lives, it's time to either change oneself or change ones faith. Perhaps it's time to either stop being a Jehovah's Witness, or submit and fully follow what they demand of their homosexual believers, which is to not engage in homosexual activity, recognize oneself as a sinner, and to stay out of political debate or discussion on the topic. Those are the options you have, realistically. Self-destructing is a natural consequence of sitting on the fence: ether abide by the religion or leave it.

If you are also a JW, talk to your congregation elders. It's hard to help remedy a problem like this when you know little about the person and his problem. 1 Corinthians is all about love, peace, and acceptance. Pick and choose some verses and chapters to help enlighten him. Praying for the best, from a fellow witness.

Reality

Unless he leaves the JW's, he's in for a tough ride. Eventually he'll leave. The alternatives (hiding his identity, trying to be straight, trying to have it both ways) are just too destructive. There are some wonderful GLBT friendly non-cultish Christian denominations that don't practice the kind of mind and behavioral control that JW's do.

If this guy tells an elder about his sexual identity, he will be watched like a hawk, marginalized, and prevented from doing things other Witness (men) are allowed to do. He will be considered a risk, though the extent of that will vary depending on where he lives and how much experience with this sort of thing his local body of elders has. Hopefully he is not in the U.S. South. If word gets out beyond the elder body that he is gay, the congregation in general will privately "mark" him -- an activity that Witnesses are told they can personally do when they are suspicious of someone but have no elder sanction for shunning. Gay people are reviled by the Witness teaching and practice. A disgust is engendered there. Heaven forbid he ever express attraction to any other man, he will be in for a rude awakening to how Witnesses treat people they don't know how to handle. And if he were to try to "rehabilitate" himself and marry a woman, the elders would be sure that she knows about his past "tendencies". Your friend is going to have a very rough time, I am sorry to say. The Witness corporation has no interest in helping. They only want to preserve order. I have seen it happen many times.

Given the structural homophobia of the Jehovah's Witnesses, there is nothing he can do to accommodate his sexual orientation within his denomination. I'd suggest that perhaps he might want to look towards explicitly gay-friendly churches, even towards denominations like the http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metropolitan_Community_Church. Christian denominations which wouldn't denigrate him on the grounds of his sexual orientation might be safest for him.

I  appreciate the A2A, but I really don't know what to tell you, I am not a  JW and don't know enough about them to offer any advice. I can't advice  going to speak to a pastor, etc, because I don't know how that would  turn out. The  only real advice I can offer is to really seek God, remove all  distractions i.e. do a media fast and read the entire bible with an  attitude of seeking help from God. In the Old Testament it talks about a period of separation, Numbers 6:1-5 1  And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying, 2 Speak unto the children of  Israel, and say unto them, When either man or woman shall separate  themselves to vow a vow of a Nazarite, to separate themselves unto the  LORD: 3 He shall separate himself from wine and  strong drink, and shall drink no vinegar of wine, or vinegar of strong  drink, neither shall he drink any liquor of grapes, nor eat moist  grapes, or dried. 4 All the days of his separation shall he eat nothing  that is made of the vine tree, from the kernels even to the husk. 5 All the days of the vow of his separation there shall no razor come upon his head: until the days be fulfilled, in the which he separateth himself unto the LORD, he shall be holy, and shall let the locks of the hair of his head grow. This  is pretty similar, during this time, read the Bible from beginning to  end, and if you feel the Lord urging you to read a particular passage  then obey it. If you feel the Lord urging you to do something, then do  it. No matter how ridiculous it seems. By obeying  the Lord you are  making an outward show of Faith and it is very powerful. Just don't do  anything illegal and claim the Lord told you to do it. We are living  under the New Covenant, God, doesn't want you to go and slay all the  'ites and 'steins or sacrifice any animals.

An answer would first depend on what he wants to do. Does he want to follow what they believe without investigating/reinvestigating the validity of their beliefs? I would like to mention that Paul (the apostle) would probably have sworn that he was serving God until he was met by a blinding white light who showed him he was doing just the opposite. Now if the young man in question chooses to follow Jehovah's Witnesses without reexamination, he knows what they will require of him.If he chooses to reexamine their beliefs and lines of reasoning, he may find that the truth is not what he thought. At which time should he find things that conflict with what he reads, he will have a decision to make.On a human level of kindness and compassion, it should be recognized that most likely when he was born he didn't decide, "You know, I'm choosing to be gay so I can get ostracized and rejected by the people I love." He likely was gay from birth, but didn't realize it until later. The God knows his biological chemical makeup and therefore knows and understands his situation.On another note, I would like to mention that if he decides to leave his religion (but perhaps keep certain morals), he should know that he is not exempt from making poor decisions. You can still cause sin (harm) against yourself and/or others regardless of your sexuality. That is why regardless of his sexuality, he should still strive to "treat others how he would like to be treated." As an example, don't do something that you know would violate someone else. Try to use discretion, be courteous, and considerate of other people's feelings. There is much to say on this subject, but I will end it here.Aaron

What are his reasons for not wanting to leave the congregation? It could be he is there for family, who he knows will shun him if he is found out. In my situation, once it was found out I was a lesbian, everyone shunned me including my family. I was disfellowshipped and now have no contact. I had stuck with the teachings for years, not because I believed everything I was taught, but because I didn't want to hurt my relatives. This happens often among Jehovah's witnesses for many reasons. It leads to hiding who they really are and it is mentally unhealthy. Once I had no choice and was "out", I learned I had friends and other family members who accepted me as I am, I learned to follow my own conscience, and I have been much happier not having everything chosen for me. He will either have to live the way he has been or get enough courage to leave because he will never be accepted if found out. I would suggest he begin having friendships outside the congregation so that he doesn't feel so alone if something happens.