what do I do now

• I was blindsided by a termination from my job last week. In some respects it was a relief because my manager was extremely unpleasant and working around her mood swings was spiraling me into major depression and other health issues. However, I am now stuck with a 7 month job on my employment record (which obviously looks suspect), a litany of the aforementioned health issues, and no idea how to actually recover from this. I need help. Wall of text below (sorry). If you look at my question history you'll get some sense of the job I was just termed from. What happened was manager called me into a meeting, told me that I was very good at forecasting, spreadsheets, mastering technology, and getting my tasks done accurately and on time, but she felt I wasn't "dynamic" enough and so was letting me go. Up till then the only other feedback I had received about my performance from her was that I needed to be warmer and more empathetic and was told to use more smiley faces and exclamation points over email to make myself more likeable (yes, really, and no, she's not 12). Aside from this feedback not jiving with feedback I was being given by my colleagues and other managers I worked with in this job (where I was frequently complimented for my helpfulness and my efficiency), as well as this feedback basically amounting to "you need to perform more emotional labor", there was never any indication that this was something that was putting my job in jeopardy. There was never any formal documentation of this feedback (I wonder if it's because of how absurd it is), I was never put on a PIP, and aside from the smiley faces and exclamation points there was no real guidance on how to improve at this nebulous task of being more empathetic. And ultimately, it seems like this feedback has nothing to do with why I was actually terminated? What does "dynamic" mean? It was all very confusing. I was told I could file for unemployment but was offered no severance. I left literally having no idea what had just happened. The thing is that while the company I had left in order to take this job was a bit dysfunctional, my manager in this new job turned out to be really difficult to work for and it wasn't long before I was missing the comfortable dysfunction of the old place. Her mood could change on a dime without warning, she seemed to have a lot of anxiety and when things didn't go as planned (which happens a bit in our unpredictable industry) her nervous energy would cast a really negative pall over the room. People (company-wide) would avoid copying her on emails if something less-than-positive happened in order to avoid the inevitable over-the-top wailing and gnashing of teeth that would ensue. She was prone to really terrifying outbursts of anger, directed at me, other colleagues, and frequently our vendors as well, which was pretty embarrassing. She also was flat-out racist (she spent a weird amount of time ranting about how awful Arabs and Muslims are) and was vocal about it in a way that seemed pretty tone deaf (especially given that our company does a lot of work overseas with countries in the Arab world). I cared greatly about the work I was doing and valued my colleagues (who valued me as well), but the stress of walking on eggshells around a volatile manager who expected me to be warm and empathetic at all times (even in the face of her vitriol) really got to me. I lost my appetite entirely and went days eating nothing more than a bowl of oatmeal for breakfast and a smoothie for lunch. I also managed to somehow gain 26 pounds even without eating enough food, because I didn't have time to exercize. I ran a 5K that I had been signed up for months ago without having run in months and with an extra 26 pounds on me, and I ended up injuring my foot very badly, and then wasn't able to have a doctor look at it because I was afraid to ask for time off work, so now I have a fairly significant limp. I wasn't able to sleep. I stopped menstruating. I took up smoking cigarettes again. I started having panic attacks on Sunday evenings dreading going to work the next day. In the last two weeks of my being employed there, I started having suicidal thoughts. So even though I think my termination was handled completely inappropriately and unfairly, I am relieved because the job obviously was making me sick. But I am now at a crossroads and I am unsure how to proceed, given the following: 1. I was only in this job for 7 months, which obviously looks like something went wrong. 2. Yes, obviously the answer to this in any interview situation is "it wasn't the right fit" BUT 2a. The company is a very well-known company in my industry and is right now having a moment in the zeitgeist which makes being let go RIGHT NOW very conspicuous AND 2b. Everyone knows everyone in my industry and I have no idea what kind of whack things my manager would say about me if asked to provide a reference - the thought of losing out on a job for reasons relating to emotional labor performance literally makes me want to puke. 3. I am in extremely poor health right now - heavier than I've ever been in my entire life (I've always been chubby but this 26 pounds has officially earned me the "obese" classification), with a bum foot that makes even standing difficult, difficulties with digestion due to my inconsistent eating habits, and I'm in a major depression (though the suicidal thoughts have finally stopped). 4. Due to the economy, my resume shows a couple of short hops due to contracting gigs I held while looking for permanent work. It's explainable because hey, economy, and hey, contracting, but still, at first glance on paper I look like a job hopper. And now I look like a job hopper who got fired. 5. I am fucking exhausted, burned out, drained, and more than a little traumatized by this last job. 6. Even if I were to miraculously find a job quickly despite all of the above, my best friend of 15 years is getting married in September and I am playing a major role in the wedding as well as the wedding planning and will be out of town for a week attending to that, and backing out of it at this point of the game is absolutely not going to happen because it's a big fucking deal (he and his boyfriend have been together for a decade and now because of the recent SCOTUS ruling are finally allowed to be married), so whatever job I took I'd be pretty much immediately taking a week off, and that seems unprofessional. I have a big chunk of savings because I cashed out my stock the day after they termed me, and my half-brother and my father have both offered to help me financially if needed. My unemployment claim went through uncontested, and I've bought health insurance through healthcare.gov. I'm at a point now where I wonder if instead of immediately hustling to find a new gig, I should just take the month (between now and my friend's wedding) to take care of myself and make up for neglecting my health for the past 7 months in favor of this awful job. Go to the doctor. Get physical therapy for my foot. Work with a trainer to start exercizing again so I can lose weight without messing up my foot further. Go to therapy to process what happened (I haven't been in therapy in years and I need it, especially now). Work with my shrink to get my depression under control. Get on Chantix so I can quit smoking again. Enjoy not being screamed at for not enough exclamation points or being unable to prevent a truck driver union dispute or not applauding her loud contention that London is overrun by Arabs and they are uncouth and don't know their place and must be stopped (all things she actually did). Sit in the sunlight and breathe. It sounds really good to me right now, the idea of taking some time to actually heal. But is that dumb? Sometimes I think that maybe this is a good strategic move too because then if asked why my most recent job was a short 7-month hop I can use the fact that I had health issues that needed to be fixed as an excuse for the short hop (since it's kind of true). Or is this career suicide, because it's a short hop followed by an intentional work gap? On the one hand, it's going to most likely take forever to find another job, so what's an extra month anyway? On the other hand, I don't want to look like someone who can't hold down a job. I honestly don't know what to do. I feel paralyzed. I'd love some input. I'd like to request that you be gentle, though, I'm still very raw. (On a slightly gratifying note, I have heard from someone who used to be employed at my company who left last year who confirmed that he did in fact leave because of my manager being so difficult to work with, and that the company overall is not in a very stable place and is coasting on it's cult status at the moment. Basically he found out what happened to me and reached out to say "it's not your fault, she is in fact batshit." It's a small comfort, but it helps.)

• Answer:

  I'm at a point now where I wonder if instead of immediately hustling to find a new gig, I should just take the month (between now and my friend's wedding) to take care of myself and make up for neglecting my health for the past 7 months in favor of this awful job. A million times, yes. Sit in the park. Get some sunshine. Breathe. Another job will come, and giving yourself an opportunity to recover for a month or two if you can afford it will help you get off on the right foot in your next role.