I just want a job

No, this is not worth it. You'd be better served by learning the Microsoft Office Suite of products, Word and Excel primarily. You probably have them on your computer now, and there are tutorials. Also, http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=excel+tutorial+2010+for+beginners has tons of stuff to watch and learn from. Check out http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=excel+powerpivot+2010 It's the bomb-diggedy. If you know Excel really, really well, you can earn more than a respectible wage. Another thing to learn is Salesforce.com. Again, http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=salesforce.com DO get certified for this one. That's it. No matter what, you'll never be 100% prepared for what they'll throw at you. Everyone's Salesforece.com is set up differently, so you'll still have to learn what THEY call their fields, and what they do within the confines, but that's no big deal.

I am an administrative assistant with no job-specific training. I would not recommend formal admin assistant training to any college-educated person with decent computer skills. Most workplaces want you to learn their special local procedures anyway, so general knowledge about things like how to take minutes, filing systems, etc. could be sortof useful, but is ultimately very likely to be covered by on-the-job training as well. Personally, I fell into admin work after an English degree; I started with some patchy office intern experience and good computer skills. I think the main things you need to get temp administrative assistant gigs are not really learned in school. In my experience, they are: 1. Excellent computer skills, MS Office in particular. Ace the temp agency tests and they will love you. If you're not there yet, try the above-mentioned Youtube tutorials, or look for a local class if you prefer that kind of learning. Don't forget to mention your typing speed on your resume--you'd be surprised how many people are out there typing 40wpm, and based on what you do now, I bet you can do better than that. 2. A resume that highlights the right points. For example, on your temp agency resume I would write that you edit subtitles, but would leave out details about where. Play up the proofreading and copyediting skills you've got, play down the anime. Don't forget to mention that you also do some HR tasks! (Also, sorry, but lots of admin assistants are responsible for the minutiae that HR folks would take care of in a bigger company.) Don't dismiss your retail experience, either--that's X many years of customer service, and you may notice that customer service is one of the topics the NSC course you're considering teaches. 3. Flexibility. Take the first job they offer, be available on short notice, and be willing to do any kind of office work. 4. An ineffable air of no-nonsense competence and unrufflability. Seriously. Don't show up in a temp agency looking nervous and diffident--show up with an "I can totally do this job, no problem, even if my work experience is sortof weird. I am reliable and calm." face. It makes a big difference. Learn to fake it. Feel free to memail me if you want to know more about what these jobs are actually like. I would also be happy to help you with your resume.

For admin work, experience and skill trump all. If you can show that you are a master at Excel or PowerPoint or something in which your potential boss needs a lot of support, that will count more than a general degree in administration. I would say go for entry-level positions (receptionist is generally the first step to administrative assistant, which is the next step to executive assistant) and get yourself in with a company. Once you prove your skills and you make it known that administration is where it's at for you, you'll be golden.

Unless they have some sort of active placement program beyond shadowing/internships I can't see how spending thousands of dollars on an non-professional associate degree would be worth it. In fact, I've known a few employers who would see such a degree as a negative, much in the same way that a degree from the University of Phoenix gets a resume discarded immediately in many places. ("Non-professional" in this context meaning that an admin isn't a licensed profession requiring certification or a degree.)

Don't mention that you don't drive unless it comes up as a necessary part of the job. People will judge you and not hire you. True. BTDT.

What @Ruthless Bunny said. Adding: * Look professional and be well-spoken in an interview. * Be able to write. (You've got this covered). * Be organized (and give examples of how you have or would organize X). * Be reliable. Don't mention that you don't drive unless it comes up as a necessary part of the job. People will judge you and not hire you. A really well-written cover letter would help tremendously. Writing skills are not common, even among executives. On preview: * @ActionPopulated's volunteering idea is excellent. * Please don't try to move to SF or NY on an Administrative Assistant's salary.

Have you looked at their https://northseattle.edu/workforce-education stuff? That program might be able to help you acquire more marketable skills. Maybe you're the kind of person who can teach yourself Excel and whatnot, or maybe you're not. Having a supportive classroom environment works better for some people. Only you know which kind of person you are. I'm a reference librarian at a state college nowhere near you. this morning I've talked with two students who already have BAs but are here to change careers. Go talk to someone in the workforce education program, do it in person, see what's available. You have fine arts skills and talents, maybe you should consider something like https://northseattle.edu/programs/architecture-engineering-technology

This doesn't help you with your immediate need for a job, but can you volunteer somewhere that will help you learn some basic office skills? I've learned a lot of basic Quickbooks working as a finance volunteer at a small non-profit business; I learned the ropes from my fellow volunteers, who were also self-taught. I swear I got my current temp job, in part, by playing up not only the finance and data entry skills I've gotten from that work, but also my ability to learn new computer programs on the fly and volunteer to take on the tasks that no one else wants to do.

I would totally skip the certificate program. I have never even darkened the doors of a trade school, much less college and I've worked my way up to well north of $50K/annual salary in a clerical career. It took me 20 years but in the end it's been worth it. I'd start out first of all by keeping in touch with the temp agencies regardless. They are ALWAYS looking for reliable people for short-term stuff (fill in for a day answering phones, etc) and you don't have to have many, or any skills really to do this other than willingness to show up on time and follow directions. Once you've demonstrated reliability and competence they'll be more willing to hire you back for other, more meaningful stints. The fact that you're currently freelancing makes you PERFECT for transitioning into clerical work a step at a time like this. And I hate to be blunt but I am an admin assistant who lives in an area that is in the top half of a percent of walkability / alternative transport / public transit in the nation, and I still have had people judge me and not hire me because I didn't have a car (I do now, but didn't for a significant length of time and it really limited me). One of the main themes of being part of an administrative team is the ability to drop everything and run go get [X] from the grocery store / Walgreens' / Target for one of your bosses and/or some company activity. Even when I worked here and didn't have a car my boss often had me take his car to go run errands. I hate to break it to you but from my long time experience (20+ years in the corporate secretarial world) this would be, not a deal breaker, but certainly a reason to pass you over for more suitable candidates. And I also have the unusual benefit of being a strong, dedicated, capable bicycle rider / racer with a lot of specialized clothing and equipment, meaning commuting to work by bike in all weathers and not having to depend on public transit to be on time or run errands was never an issue for me even when I didn't have a car. Go read my thread about learning to drive stick in my forties and how freaked out I was about that and ultimately triumphed over it, then consider trying to work towards making driving not an issue with regards to your employability. You don't have to accomplish this all at once, you can do this in small sips if you have friends / family willing to help, or barring that can get lessons from a professional driving school.