Moving across the country: good idea, bad idea, or BEST idea?

I have to caution strongly against moving to portland without a job. I live in seattle, and multiple friends have tried to move there without a job. I don't mean some tiny number like two, i mean six+. Some of them had VERY strong resumes in their field, to the point that knowledgable people higher up in their field said they'd probably just walk into a job with open arms. Every single on of them flamed out and went home, or ended up working at some totally garbage job like part time at a fedex store while they tried to get a real job until they finally just said fuck it and came back. And these weren't lazy stoners just sitting on their asses all day and firing off an occasional craigslist email, these people were hustling. The job market there for a lot of stuff just seems to be insular, a buyers market for employers, and as that implies just kind of overloaded on the looking side. If you have a specific line on a job, and not just a conceptual "oh i can totally help you out" thing(unless you are very, very certain they're really networked enough to land you a real interview asap) then go for it. But it's a very hard down to just parachute into and lay down some roots. And, for what it's worth, all of them came back to town and landed jobs very very quickly once they got here. Something about the job market in portland is just... odd and oversaturated. Seattle seemed to recover from the recession much, much more quickly while portland is just floundering(and this isn't any specific profession. Everything from graphic design to high end clothing retail to tech to...) That said, i am pro you doing this. There's many times i've said fuck it, made it to this point, and later wished i had just left. Just... fuck it in moderation. Do an interview and land something before you completely jump out of the plane.

If this is a regular occurrence then that makes me a little more cautious... What, a regular occurrence among managers in Portland, or at that particular company, or what, exactly? There are shitty and capricious managers literally everywhere, in every city and industry. You will not escape them simply by not moving to Portland! You should always be cautious when investigating new employment opportunities, no matter where they are: no one's going to do the due diligence on your behalf better than you yourself. But don't let one anecdotal crappy job story keep you from moving to a city if you want to move to a city.

Would you advise your friend who just went through all that at the top of this post to uproot themselves and move to the other side of the country? Sure! Why the fuck not? You should do it because there's no reason not to! The logistics are the cake-iest part. Some employers will pay at least some towards relocation and others won't. But for the nitty-gritty, what you do is comb through all the old askmes about moving and find out how many other people have done this without ever having done it before and VOILA! you are not alone: you are in the club of people making their first big cross-country move! Shit, I waited until I was a few years into my 30s to do it and it still turned out awesome. People way dumber than you have managed this, so do.not. let this moving thing intimidate you. First steps include updating your resume and linked in (I guess, if that's a thing in your industry) and contacting a recruiter (again, if that's a thing) and certainly put the word out to friends/acquaintances that you're looking to maybe move to [place] and need a job in [field]. Don't talk yourself out of it before you've even started!

One of the smartest things I ever read here on AskMe is that moving cities is one of the few big life choices you can make that's fairly easy to undo. So why not give it a shot? I would definitely recommend Seattle for economic reasons. I moved there in 2009 (and left in January this year, though that decision is feeling increasingly temporary), and it just sort of felt like the recession never happened there the way it did in other cities. Seattle has a remarkably diverse economy for a city of its size, anchored by several large, healthy companies, so it's economically very stable. Culturally, the Northwest is its own region, and it's impossible to know whether or not it will suit you until you've been there a while. Like you, I'd visited and really liked it, felt very at home, but it was still a bit of an adjustment for the first year or so. Seattle Freeze is a real thing, though if you can get involved in active communities there, that will help a lot. People in Seattle are really into socializing through activities and interest groups. That said, I found the more laid-back nature of the culture made it easier to cultivate close relationships there. When I went back a few weeks ago, I was overwhelmed at how many good, close friends I had there after 4 years. But whichever city you pick, I think it's a great idea to try living somewhere else for a while. You're in a transitional phase and the world is your oyster. Why not try something new and see how it suits you? If you hate it, you can always go home.

I can only superendorse emptythought's comments on the Portland job market. I lived there for ten years of constantly getting and losing jobs, often through incredibly whimsical office politics, and contrary to experience in other cities. It's not just the economic picture but there's something about the culture - though I loved it and would grab a chance to move back after I retire or win the lottery, the dark side of that culture is that it often is very cliquey and shallow. And I was good friends with my neighbors, but it was hard to develop a wider social network in Portland. Maybe ephemeral is a good word for it.

Portland is a great city. That said, it won't necessarily be any easier to meet people there than where you live now, most likely, because you'll have to put effort into it (it's just harder in your late 20s) no matter where you are. What type of work do you do? Depending on how the market is for your particular skills, yes, companies may pay to fly you out for interviews and then pay your moving expenses. I've done this a couple of times. But it's challenging, I think, if there happens to be a big pool of qualified applicants for the jobs you want locally. Sometimes people use a friends' local address on their resume, and pay to fly themselves out for interviews. You could also of course take a chance and just move, but my impression is that Portland, at least, is not overflowing with jobs, so there's more of a risk. Seattle may be different. Don't let a fear of moving hold you back from making the change, though. Take it from someone who has moved much more than I ever expected to. It's annoying, but quickly over, and then you get to enjoy exploring a new city and building a new life.

There's always a million reasons not to do something. Instead of worrying about the rare, worst case scenario (like you'll get fired immediately because a manager doesn't like you and is a piece of shit), follow your dreams. It's easy to do nothing if you let every possible doubt deter you. But that's not really reasonable.

I made the decision to do something like this a little over 4 years ago after a LTR went sour. After tons of research I moved from Colorado to Seattle. Without a job or housing lined up. Without any support network--just some people I had met briefly at a convention in Seattle a few months prior (my first/only time in Seattle). I moved with nothing really, except a backpack and suitcase filled with my possessions (clothes, computer, etc.) and a little chunk of savings from selling off my (older and used) car. I just needed the basics. I used public transit (my first time) to get from the airport to an extended stay hotel. I lived in the hotel for a few months while job-hunting, then moved closer to Seattle by moving in with some friends I made. Now I live in my own place in downtown Seattle. YMMV, but I was fleeing unhappiness and though moving helped improve the situation aspect of that, it has had less impact on the deeper causes. The positive influence of the move is more subtle than I anticipated (I know better now), and so I still struggle with the same issues I did prior to moving. That is something to consider given your history. Finding/developing a new professional support network is tough. That said, it was still one of the best decisions of my life. It has challenged me, brought me out of my comfort zone, and allowed me to encounter so many new people and things. The personal growth I've experienced wouldn't have been possible (for me at least) in a place associated with so many bad memories (previous state). Starting from 'scratch' forced me out of my cocoon a bit and I anticipate a repeat of these kind of moves in the future. It's been fun (and yes, sometimes terrifying) establishing oneself in a new place. Have a contingency plan for if it doesn't work. But otherwise, yeah, why not give it a try?

There's a lot of good thoughtful long answers so I'll just say this: Yes move. I ALWAYS err on the just do it side of things and I've moved all over north america even more recently with kids in tow. All your obstacles are perceived. SO is major bread winner and not portable. Kids in school. Elderly parents that you are sole caregiver for.... Those are more impenetrable obstacles. You should move. You will enjoy it. It's like 2 years of fresh romance (oooh what a pretty street. Oooh that's a cool shop/bakery/park/diner I'll have to go in there) Do it.