Shady co-worker, but maybe I don't even care - report or ignore?
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I had a weird situation at work and I'm not sure if I should do anything about it or just ignore it. Part of me is motivated to do something about it because I find it shady and inappropriate. Part of me wonders if there is a way to use this to my advantage at all since office politics is something I do not do. Sorry of this is too long for something that isn't very scandalous. My office is working on a big project that they want to be top secret. Basically, we are targeting our competitors directly. I am doing some research for the project and I came across something that seemed like it may seriously jeopardize the strategic attack we are going to launch soon. I was in a meeting with three other colleagues, all who are aware of it, while two of them are directly in the meetings around the planning of it. As we were waiting for the meeting to begin, I mentioned this potential problem I came across because I was wondering what two of my colleagues in the meeting made of it. I told them what I said was only for that room and not to say anything about it. Well, one of the people in the meeting (we will call him Chris -- he was the one not directly involved in the project) mentioned it to another co-worker of mine who we will call Bob. Chris should not have told Bob, obviously, because I said not to say anything. I'm not even sure it was a huge deal to keep this secret, but I did ask and Chris totally ignored it, and then I had to deal with Bob bugging me. I told Chris that wasn't cool for him to share that as I had asked it not leave the room. He apologized. Whatever. Lesson learned re: Chris. Bob is relatively new and, in my opinion, intense and weird. He doesn't know when to shut up in a meeting, and he is also nosey and awkward. We have an open office plan and when I am talking to my subordinates, like trying to explain something, Bob will say "What are you talking about" and come over from the other side of the desk and sit down and look at the screen and insert himself in the conversation. Sometimes he will come over and ask for something and then when the coversation ends, he will just sit there to the point where I've actually had to eventually say "Did you need something else?" So anyway, Bob chats me and asks if he can "bend (my) ear." I think it's a work question so I say sure. He pulls me in a private meeting room and says Chris told him I found something that could destory our whole project. (Bob is aware of this project, but not involved.) I say no, it's not a big deal and other people in the organization don't seem too worried. He asks what it is. I tell him that was supposed to be a private conversation directed toward another department head and I really shouldn't get into it. He persists and I try to continue to say it's not a big deal, but that conversation was really just for that room and Chris was out of line to mention it. Bob then tells me that if he asks his friends who work for our competitors, they'll be able to tell him. I said "No, it's nothing they would be aware of." I reiterate it was meant to be a private conversation and not worth getting into. He sits and stares and doesn't say anything. It's incredibly awkward so I finally say, "Okay, I'm gonna go back to my desk now" and I leave. He stays sitting in there, but my desk is visible from the door, and I can see him looking at me from where he is sitting in the private meeting room. It was weird. Afterward, he gchats me (on the record) and says something like, "I just don't like being told no, to explain my reaction." I respond and reiterate it was a private conversation about a project that doesn't affect him, his tone was inappropriate and his threat to reach out to our competitor was not cool as something like that leaking would be damaging to the organization. He apologized, said he made a mistake, and said he didn't mean to make a threat but he understood how it sounded that way. He said he wasn't thinking that far ahead and realized after our conversation he would've had to tell our competitors about the project to ask them why it would fail, which he wouldn't do. I didn't have anything else to say and he says "You don't have to respond but I'm sorry I put you in that situation." The whole conversation is on the record. I'll be honest -- I don't care for Bob. Aside from how awkward he is, I also frankly think he sucks at his job. Not his fault, he should have never been hired for his position in the first place, but it's created extra work as I have to fix what he does, and we have completely different roles. People in my office realize I have to fix his work and I've made sure I've covered myself so people realize I am devoting time on it if they are expecting other stuff from me. In an ideal world, he would never bother me again because I don't like him and he should do his own job. That being said, in two weeks, I am moving. I will continue to do my same job with my same office, but they are letting me work remotely. I will never have to see Bob or deal with his weirdness face-to-face again. Yay! I will still have to deal with him over email or gchat, but it's easier to manage because I can ignore him and set the terms of our communication. It's been much easier over email and gchat to say to him "I'm gonna do this, you do this" and set the terms of how things will work and keep things separated. My questions: Should I bother letting anyone know that Bob maybe kind of threatened to undermine this project that is a top priority for the organization? He later told me on gchat that what he said was not meant to be a threat. Should I bother pointing out that he seems to have some boundary issues? I've already flagged that he is ill-equipped for his job (luckily, I am not the only one to say it) but I worry if I flag this incident, then it looks like I just resent that he is bad at his job. Also, if I am moving and probably can manage my relationship with him much easier remotely, would it be pointless to stir this up? Should I just ignore it? Would I seem petty for doing it, or loyal the the organization and trustworthy? Again, I'm not entirely sure this conversation absolutely needed to be a secret -- clearly my superiors do not think it will destroy the project -- but the aggressive way he questioned me really turned me off and made me not want to tell him anything. It was odd to me. That said, will I look like a douche-bag who is trying to withhold info to feel important? I don't think I would get in trouble for mentioning the situation in front of Chris -- I don't think it was a huge deal and Chris was the one who behaved inappropriately. So, what would you do? What do you think I should do? And why?
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Answer:
I would give a heads up to someone higher up in the organization simply because if you don't, and this guy does spill the beans about the project to a competitor, it's on the record that you know he threatened to do so and you chose not to tell anyone. You don't want to be drawn into that sort of badness. In order to protect yourself, I think it makes sense to notify a higher up and let them take whatever action they think is necessary. I think it is appropriate to couch it as "I'm not sure what to make of this incident, or even whether I should be reporting it, but I figured it was better to be safe than sorry down the line."
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Other answers
I find it extremely odd that a new hire and someone of lower office rank would call a meeting and insist that you divulge information about a confidential matter, and then continue to insist that you do so, in the face of your flat out telling them it is inappropriate for them to know about the issue to begin with. Tell someone, cover your ass. That's not just awkward and poorly socialized, that's socialized in an aggressive and potentially dangerous manner, and it might not blow up with regards to this project, but sooner or later, someone else is going to make a complaint about having been cornered by this guy in a way that made them feel uncomfortable, and you are going to want the history on the books to make the case to fire him.
instead of three wishes
I worked with a Bob. I followed Rainbowbrite's suggestions, and it seemed like everyone knew he was awkward and would try to pump people for information, but management did nothing. I eventually left the company for other reasons. He conversationally would continue to tell me about projects, and I would remind him that he was violating company policy by doing so. He continued to tell me about confidential project info - and remember, I was no longer part of his company! I finally called a higher ranking VP at the company and said, you really want to rein this in. Here's what I know about XYZ top secret project. I have said nothing to anyone besides you, but not everyone has the same ethics, and honestly, I don't want to know any more. I haven't heard from Bob in a few months now. Based on my experience, it's entirely possible that he IS telling people at Rival what he knows, not because he's a spy, but because he Just. Doesn't. Get. It. And by "it", I mean boundaries and why you don't discuss confidential contracts with any random person. He might not be a corporate spy, but he's totally the dude that a corporate spy would want to be friends with.
RogueTech
I think that was one of the weirdest exchanges I can think of in a workplace. I think you report just the facts (pulled you into a private room to ask about Project, and when you declined to elaborate on need-to-know info, he threatened to reach out to a competitor to find out what this need-to-know info was.) Also, forward the chat. They should probably wait to fire him until after Project is completed and deployed. He's a loose canon. Yep. You have to tell higher ups. Sorry.
jbenben
"I just don't like being told no, to explain my reaction." He sounds threatening. Document everything. If you have run ins with him again you can document a clear pattern.
Omnomnom
(Just to add -- not everyone is as capable of standing up for themselves when aggressively cornered on a subject like this. Seriously, help protect your co-workers who are going to be left behind to deal with this guy).
instead of three wishes
Yes, let your higher-ups know of this immediately, and documentdocumentDOCUMENT everything: Bob may be a nosy weirdo with poor boundaries and/or interpersonal office skills, but he's basically just threatened to sink the entire project if you don't give in to his blackmail and let him know everything --- which, by the way, would only risk even more info he could pass on to your competitor.
easily confused
I think Bob's comment was rather innocent. I also think you should report it. Why take on this responsibility yourself? That's up to Bob's supervisor. If something bad happens, you don't want to be the person who knew about it and didn't do anything; especially since you don't know what Bob would do if cornered: he clearly can't maintain. If his supervisor doesn't care, then fine. But don't be the one to make the call.
spaltavian
Seconding rainbowbrite that you should at least let your supervisor - or whoever assigned you this project - know what happened. Not only so the situation is documented, but also so that it then becomes their responsibility to figure out whether this is A Thing or not.
EmpressCallipygos
As rhizome says, this depends a bit on whether the project is formally secret or is more like playing at SEEKRIT PLANZ, given the problem with Chris. the OP made it very clear this is real, big time secret stuff ... I don't know why everyone insists on doing this demeaning thing where they speculate about "playing at SEEKRIT PLANZ." Have some courtesy for the OP and assume what they stated in the question is true.
jayder
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