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I am 18 years 4 months old and my parents don't allow me to watch any movies. Is this normal?

  • Latest edited description: I was made to join a local university, which is highly reputed under the eyes of my parents. But, in realty it seriously sucks because of its extremely high disciplinary standards, high work pressure, no girls in 500 mtr radius of my faculty... To add to the misery, I have to share my room with my grandfather, who is highly suspicious of all my activities. Forget about downloading/watching movies on PC/phone, I browse Facebook by turning on the 'Do not show images' in chrome and decreasing font size till text is barely readable to avoid generating any suspicion in his mind. The reason for my parent's denial is unknown. However these following conversations might help you understand the complexity of issue. (A visit to far relative) Relative1 : Do you like watching movies? Boy: (pointing to his father) He doesn't let me watch. Father: Well thats true, Who has got that much time to watch a full movie. (Another visit to some other relative) Relative2 : (To Mother) After his exams get finished, take him to watch some movie. Mother: They don't make any good movies nowadays. None of them could be watched along with entire family. Boy:  All my friends are going for a movie. Father: Let them go. Boy: I want to join them. Father: You can go on  Sunday, but we'll  be accompanying you. (...and that Sunday never comes) Boy: Fast and furious 7 is going to be released on 2nd April Father: English movie? (A Hollywood movie?) Boy: Yes Father: Don't cultivate new interests (While watching TV) Boy: Please switch to Sony Pix, they are showing Shawshank redemption. Mom: What's there to watch in a movie, better watch news. (On Boy's 17 Birthday) Boy: I want to watch Transformers Age of extinction in 3d Father: (Silent) Mother: Let him watch. Grandmother: Who goes these days to watch a movie in theatres, everybody watches them on TVs. It would be there on TV in 2-3 months. Every time the parents are watching some movie and boy enters the room, they immediately switch the channels. The boy often ends up being depressed whenever someone : recommends him a movie/ asks him to come with them for a movie/ talks about movies in his presence. Whenever the boy is about to ask his parents for a movie, his heart starts beating real fast because of the fear of getting scolded. So, he prefers crying like a baby (obviously, alone) than asking for consent. Previous description: I am a Indian teenager (boy)(in class 12th now). Problem is that my parents don't allow me to watch movies. Whenever I ask them for a movie they say "No! We can't allow you to watch any movie" And their face is like as if I have commited some serious crime by asking that. I don't know why they do so. Maybe because of Sex and Nudity or maybe because of overpriced tickets. My father has a govrt. job (LIC) and is getting a handsome salary, so I think we can afford the tickets (atleast once in 10 years) As a result, I have never been to a cinema hall. Only movie I have watched is 3 Idiots, and during that too my mom kept switching channels during the kissing scene, during the mona's delievery scene, and also when drunk rancho proposed piya. When the mona's delievery scene came, my mother looked at me and said to me "I already told you not to watch this, so cheap" and her eyes were like as if she would kill me next moment. I feel like I should skip one of my classes to see how a cinema hall would look from inside, but I know this is wrong and I wouldn't surely do that. Please sugest ways to convince my parents (I am dying to see the X-Men).

  • Answer:

    I come from an Asian family and when I was little we could watch kids movies. Sometimes we watched grown up shows like "The Love Boat." Which I'm sure most of you have never heard of because it was on in the 80's.  But my aunt would make me cover my eyes during the kissing scenes.  My cousin who is in med school and 23 years old, her dad still tries to hold her hand when she crosses the street. And her parents still tell her what to do and she listens. Like she has to be home by a certain time when she visits them. Or she can't take a trip out of town by herself. Point being, each culture, each set of parents have a certain level of tolerance they can or can't deal with.  It's really not about the movies. It's about them not wanting you to be "cheap."  It just sounds like they are super old school and don't want you to be exposed to sex, drugs and rocking roll :-). I highly doubt you will be able to change their minds. You will officially be your own man at 18 years old and you can do what you want when you live on your own if that is your plan. Whether you live with them or not during college, just watch your movies for goodness sake! Don't ask them for permission.  Don't even talk to them about it.  Watch them and keep that experience to yourself. It's not a sin. Just don't make a big deal out if it and it won't be a big deal.

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Any way you look at it, its not at all normal! Even people who don't like to watch movies, watch a couple of movies once in a blue moon. Something is seriously wrong with your parents, i mean i get it if they want to keep you away from violence/gore/sexuality/religious views/individuality projected in movies. In that case they should control the kind of movies you are exposed to not completely ban you from watching movies. I can't really understand your situation without knowing your parent's side of the story. In any case you have access to the internet, so watch a couple of them online or at least a couple of clips from movies. Watch Charlie Chaplin on Youtube, i mean come on parents a bit of Charlie Chaplin never hurt anyone. Just out of curiosity what's that one film they allowed you to see? Edit: Just read it in the description. Look at the irony, the only film you ever watched is 3 idiots.

Vijay Thanki

You are normal obviously. You are 17 already. I have an interesting question for you : You are not allowed to watch movies. But have access to Internet? Really :-) Literally, every thing is there on net..  All your movies, the sex... Porn. So what's the big deal. Take this as your parenting lesson - do not repeat same with your children and make their social growth stunted.

Anand Prashar

I am 21 and I haven't watched any movie either, out of personal choice, I was also initially discouraged from watching movies as my parents thought it was a waste of time and as I grew up I just got used to it. I mean it is not such a big deal. I mean, yes I get a lot of stares when I tell people I don't watch movies, and many a times it is awkward when I meet someone new and they try to break the ice by discussing about movies and I have to politely tell them that I don't watch movies. There are good things as well. My friends in my college took it up as a challenge to make me watch a movie in 4 years of engineering and failed. It was mostly because they all never concurred on which movie to take me to and it was a lot of fun watching the arguments. I don't think I have really lost out of anything because of not watching movies either. I have had a fairly normal time all these years and I don't regret not watching movies. Possible reasons for watching a movie would be- Entertainment - From what I hear people simply watch a movie and come back and bash the hero, director and everyone. Everybody complains that there are very few good movies and hence you may not be missing out on too much anyway. Relieve Stress - Maybe, but there are may other ways as well. I used to take log walks or go jogging. I mean there is not really a lot of things you are missing out. Also, many friends of mine who never had chances to watch movies when they were in school for whatever reason, did start watching movies when they came to college. So once you finish school and go to college you might get a chance. My parents nowadays actually ask me to watch a few movies.

Anonymous

Reminds me of the Plot of Hugo. Where Chloe Grace Moretz wasn't allowed to watch movies because her father didn't allow it. Little did she know that her father, Georges Melies was the pioneer of visual effects and filmmaking. George's career had taken a sudden slump and the entire industry bailed on him, the reason why Georges doesn't let her daughter watch movies, fearing it will happen to her too! But that was back in 1930s! There are answers which mention that it is normal to not watch movies. They are wrong. They are missing out on a lot of things! Movies aren't just entertainment or stress relievers. Its a whole world! A movie lets you to live an entirely new and different life in only a few hours. I am sorry that you aren't allowed to watch movies. I am just saying you should try to watch as many as you can! You have internet, simoly download the movies from torrents! Don't listen to anyone who says movies are a waste of time. They are ignorant about it and are certainly wrong!

Bhagyesh Parekh

Okay, listen. Except for the Middle East and South Asia, this is an absolute rarity... almost something that can be made into a film. To help you out... even the Fascists, at the time of global tension and military supremacy when man could think of nothing but discipline and essentials. had invested in the film industry. Well, that helped Italian neorealism actually flourish. That doesn't make the Fascists good, but anyway, if they had done this, they had a reason. Now, if your parents denounce cinema, they might as well not like literature, theater, music... or any form of art that doesn't not give you tangible provision. Well, of course, inspiration or knowledge is not nutritive. But there is something very relevant, that sustains the human society and the reason we are still departed from absolute robotic indoctrination... and still relish a liberty of thought, and are not entangled in a mechanism of impositions. That is called culture. If your parents do this, they have never known culture. Another fact- It depends on your exposure. What kind of cinema you opt for? You better know, there is cinema beyond Bollywood and Hollywood. This is cinema that had engaged great thinkers, intellectuals and geniuses (Bergman, Godard, Truffaut, Fellini, Bunuel, Kurosawa, Kiarostami, Satyajit Ray, etc- just my favorites. there is more). What you need now is a crash course in world cinema. Contact me any time. You better know the auteur theory and stuff like that first. Now, how would you manage that? Cinema is very accessible these days, and has been democratized by the internet. Your culturally-averted parents can't forbid you from exploiting this.

Deepro Roy

I started watching movies when I was 10 and im like movie buff right now only because of my father. It's only coz of your parents. You need not go to theatres. Im having around 5000+ movies. You can start collecting or downloading them. Find some good movies online without vulgarity, nudity or any obscene things and show them to your parents to make them beleive that they are good . You are missing a loads of info which couldn't be learnt normally in a decade. Visit imdb fr details. Or pm for movies list. I want you out of this asap. All the best.

Ashwinn Mutthu

Well,  I totally get that you can feel that your parents are being unreasonable sometimes, but there's always a reason behind everything. Try and talk about the topic of movies sometimes, ask something like what their favorite movie is, whether they've seen movies together, stuff like that. And there's nothing wrong about the X-Men movie at all, Jennifer's an avatar so, consider her covered. Control is good but you're gonna be 18 now so you should at least have the freedom to go watch movies, not necessarily violent and adult movies, can be a lighthearted comedy or romance too.

Yash Gokhale

Your situation looks quite grave to me. Afterall every person needs a break or some form of entertainment. Movies are usually the best solution for most of the people. And considering that you have reached an age where such restrictions would frustrate you to the core and you would one day want to reason them for this. Well noe it is the time my friend. Have a mature and practical discussion with them about this, as to what are the reasons due to which they are not allowing you to watch movies. Is it about the content or the price issue as you mentioned or something else which I cant think of right now but they might have. Considering the situation exactly as you have mentioned, it seems a very suffocating situation which needs to be dealt with soon. Do not get too aggressive or go out on them completely as it might cause more trouble and can aggrevate the whole scene. I hope this issue of yours gets sorted out soon and you get to see your movies freely :)

Shenoy Chakerwarti

Well it is a bit normal. But what's funny is that you're allowed to surf the net. How is that 'safer' than movies?

Angshuman Biswas

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