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How to invite my friends for the new Orkut?

Ok 2 ask friends to invite their friends to like your website's FB page?

  • Social Media / General Etiquette: Acceptable to ask a friend to invite some of their Facebook friends to follow your artistic website’s Facebook page? Some background: I’m a writer of literature. For a decade, I’ve been operating under the radar, periodically sharing my writings with a small number of friends and acquaintances, periodically trying to publish in literary journals and so on, and doing almost no self-promotion. Since I haven't yet published a novel with an established publisher, and since my writings hitherto have appeared in a sprinkling of relatively obscure publications, virtually no promotion has been done on my behalf. For the last several years, some friends and acquaintances have persistently been encouraging me to jump into the digital age and establish a web presence, so that I can interact regularly with a readership, get some recognition, maybe make some income via donations (or possibly subscriptions), and potentially plant seeds for future publication. After much trepidation, about four months ago, finally decided to take the proverbial plunge, and released a literary website (which I'd been designing and adding content to for some time). The website is a hybrid of a personal blog and a magazine, both showcasing some of my own writings, and featuring quality writings and other media by Contributors, articles, rare songs, videos, interviews, philosophy, psychology, dreams, and other quality items of the literary, philosophical, and artistic persuasions. I tend to post several or more items-- including one or two pieces by Contributors-- weekly. Since releasing the site, I've also been posting 5-6 days a week once or twice a day (occasionally more) on FB, Google+, and Twitter, and occasionally some other social media sites. The posts are either pieces that appear on the site, or worthwhile (hopefully) things pertaining to the literary: illuminating, informative, poetic, comic, tragic, usefully irreverent, or captivatingly absurd. So, edging towards the question... The amount of time it's taken to build and design the site, work with a developer to make significant changes, do research (I was pretty green when I started, and still am), put together posts from myself or contributors, curate compelling pieces, read (and sometimes edit) submissions, respond to voluminous emails, post on social media sites daily, etc, as well as the money it has taken to maintain and design the site, have been considerable, much more than anticipated. And it's beginning to feel that all of this work is almost not worth it without some semblance of a readership. But an obstacle to gaining a readership I've run into: For a literary (or other artistic) site, FB, for good or ill, is currently pretty much the only game in town for getting posts seen regularly by an audience. Pretty recently, in order to increase revenue, FB changed its parameters such that only a small fraction of a ‘business'’ page’s followers will see a post when it is made, a fraction that is reduced further by FB now only showing “trending” posts at the top of the newsfeed by default. As my site’s FB page currently has around 150 followers-- which I was able to get by inviting FB friends through my personal page, and through a few (tasteful) "mass" emails, one sent on my behalf by a close friend, to follow it-- this effectively translates into something like 1-5 people simply even seeing a new post when it is made in their newsfeed. For the most part, it looks like the main ways I can get more people to subscribe to my site's FB page's posts are: (a) By paying Facebook and running campaigns. But because the literary site makes no money yet (if it ever will), and I'm an impecunious writer, and because, apparently, from all I've read, FB campaigns are poor at reaching the right audience and the amount of "likes" one gets for the price is abysmal, this option does not really make sense. (b) Ask some friends, acquaintances, and maybe Contributors to invite their friends who might be interested in the site to follow its FB page (c) I realize that there are some other alternatives, such as handing out 'business cards,' or participating in literary events, or getting people onto the site through 'organic traffic' or 'paid traffic' and having them find the FB page this way, and so on. So far these options have not translated into any "followers" (boy, I don't love this word-- "subscribers" seems more dignified). Performing artists, such as musicians, or theater groups, or actors, for manifold reasons, seem to be able to leverage these alternatives much more to get a "following" than a writer is able to. I likely wouldn't have thought of Option B myself had not a few acquaintances asked me to do this for their arts and business pages several months back. I thought their pages worthwhile, and so felt totally fine about doing this, and was glad to show love to their projects and help them promote themselves and maybe make some more income. After this a distant acquaintance, upon learning of the site, apropos nothing suggested she invite some of her friends to "like" its FB page, which was great (adding maybe 5-10 people, which some might say is trifling, but my feeling is that even one very engaged person makes a huge difference in the fabric of existence). So I began to feel that this method of asking friends to ask their friends to like the page could be a viable way of enlarging its readership. I've asked about a half dozen people so far (those I consider friends or close acquaintances, and one contributor), and have had extremely mixed results, so now don't know what to think. One person seemed put off by the prospect and said they didn't feel comfortable doing it. Another, who it turns out has a 'huge following on Twitter,' and a considerable one on FB (which I had no idea about), actually seemed almost offended by the question. Three people seemed totally casual about it and quite happy to do it (pretty much same as my response to the people who asked me). One friend, a classical musician whom I've been showing support to for years and years, listening to many pieces by her, going to many of her performances over the years, listing her prominently at the top of the Friends (links) section of my website, and so on, seemed to ignore the email I sent her asking if she could do this. A few months passed, I realized she'd never responded, thought maybe the email simply fell through the cracks, and in another conversational email asked her a second time. And again-- no response. Likely signaling (as she responded to other emails) that she felt uncomfortable somehow about it. A person I used to be closer friends with, another musician, sent an email asking if I'd feature his band's latest music video on the site (and, implicitly, in social media posts). I said I'd be glad to. And by the way, if he felt like it, as it would help him and other contributors get exposure, and as almost no one is looking at the posts now, could he show some love and invite some friends who might be interested to "like" the FB page. He disappeared as well. Sent him an email asking if he still wanted to run the video. Haven't heard back. So-- now don't really know how to look at this. Pretty conflicted. Definitely don't want to over-impose on anyone or come off as uncouth, or selfish, or obnoxious. As I mentioned, I'm pretty green when it comes to social media, so it's possible I'm violating or stretching some sacrosanct code of conduct I'm not aware of (although, in the rapidly changing digital world, all but the most basic ethical codes seem to change rapidly), or that in general the request is ethically and socially much more to ask than I realize. Incidentally, one interesting observation: the people who seemed glad to do it (as well as the woman who volunteered apropos nothing) are Eastern European, European, and Latin American, whereas the ones who did not want to do it or disappeared are North American (USA). Not sure in this case if this indicates any pattern or is just random; not enough "data" to tell. Any insights, suggestions, and so on would be much appreciated. Thanks! ------------------ [Note: Please, no very snarky, naysaying, or dismissive comments, as can sometimes happen on AskMeFi. Please, only constructive insights and suggestions. Thanks again.]

  • Answer:

    It is generally fine for you to ask, though some people will be annoyed and a lot of people will simply not respond. You're not violating an unwritten rule at all, but neither are they by ignoring the request. There's not really a way to get around that -- you will definitely annoy some people and there's basically no way to know in advance which people it will annoy. One thing I will say, and I apologize if this comes off as snarky or dismissive, but if your manner of asking this favor is anywhere near as long-winded and stilted as this question, you're probably overwhelming people with the request. A status or simple message to your personal friends on FB that says "Hey, I'm trying to build up Likes for my page about my writing ( link ). I'd really appreciate it if you would consider sharing it with your friends and asking them to Like it if they, you know, actually like it." is probably all that's necessary.

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I've been sharing their stuff in all sorts of ways and seeing their performances for years, so their apparent reticence surprised me. The difference is that you've been sharing your friends' work because you enjoyed it. Now you're asking them to share your work in some kind of quid pro quo that they never agreed to enter. I've seen this over and over in my years online, especially amongst creative types -- the idea that because you promoted somebody's work, they owe it to you to do the same. They don't. Believing that they do is an excellent way to make your prior acts look mercenary, like you only undertook them on the expectation that you were banking a future favour. You did something nice for your friends. I'm sure they appreciated it. Don't try to attach strings, now, after the fact. Can I tell you a small story? When I was in my mid-twenties, I had a friend who was in her mid-forties. My friend told me something that's always stayed with me: Whenever you do something for somebody, expect nothing more than a "Thank you" in return. If you're going to be unhappy with just a "Thank you," you should reconsider doing it. If you live your life that way, she said, your life will be much simpler. She was right.

Georgina

I do social media (among other things) for a living, and one pretty hard-and-fast rule is that asking people to share your page is wayyyyy less effective than encouraging them to share individual posts. People share interesting (to them!) content, they don't really share pages. By asking them to share your page, you're not only asking a favor, you're asking them to do something that's not exactly natural in this context. If I share your stuff with my friends on FB I'm not doing it for your benefit! I'm doing it because I think my friends will enjoy it. Ding ding ding. Here's the thing about social media - you may be using it to promote your own site, but no one else is there to promote your site. They are there for their own reasons: entertainment, connection, to look good, what have you. Sure, a few people who are really nice and like you as a person will share what you ask them to share. But unless you're giving people stuff that they truly find valuable, this approach will not get you very far. And in general, people don't find a lot of value in sharing a page - but they might find it in sharing a really great individual piece of content. That's not to say you should necessarily send your friends emails asking them to share individual posts. But you can work on making your posts interesting and pithy (this is key!) and share them from your own personal account. Also, I agree that sinking a ton of time into FB may not be the best investment for you right now, but that's for another question.

lunasol

You ought to find other literary blogs, twitter accounts, forums, and message boards... and start to get active and trade links there. Your target audience is people who are actually into literature, not random friends-of-friends. You're more likely to find interested people in interest groups, be the groups online or local. I, also, would feel mildly annoyed and and ignore the request if someone asked me to share their literary blog via my Facebook. If you think that Facebook is the best way to get readers for your blog, you don't really understand social media.

htid

You are overthinking this. Some people are fine with doing this and others aren't. It's a difference in personal social media style. You are not violating any codes of conduct in asking the question. If people don't immediately say that they'd be happy to share your side, don't press the point.

town of cats

I would be a little annoyed if a friend asked me to spam my friends on their behalf. I would roll my eyes, and I wouldn't do it. I'd feel a bit awkward about telling my friend that, so I probably would pretend not to have seen the email unless directly asked about it. I expect you got a worse response from the person with the larger following as they might have felt like you were taking advantage of their popularity. (Kind of like when one writer asks another if they'll pass a manuscript on to their agent). I don't think there's a problem with putting a request on your facebook page though, rather than sending an email.

lollusc

I do think that the request is socially more than you're realising, especially if the people you're asking are, as seems to be the case, public figures of a sort. It's one thing to encourage your friend to do their thing and try to connect with people who will appreciate said thing. It's another thing for someone who's presenting themselves as a brand (which is what people who are "successful" at social media are doing, generally, and definitely what musicians, etc, are doing) to link your stuff. Linking something is an implicit endorsement, unless there's explicit commentary to the contrary. Your friend who has a dozen Facebook followers, etc, can link you and they're just a dude saying hey, this is a thing. Your friend who has 100k Twitter followers links you and they're effectively standing in the middle of the street with a microphone saying HEY HERE IS A THING. If you're doing the latter, especially if you're going to be linking [recced thing] to your professional brand, you're going to be pretty picky about who you link, if you link at all.

MeghanC

Honestly, as the years go by on Facebook, I'm unliking and hiding a whole lot of stuff. I ignore most requests to like pages. If somebody repeatedly asked me via e-mail to like their page, I would find it odd and probably not like the page unless it was super aligned with my interests. You have not heard back from these people because they do not want to do it. Repeated asking won't help.

futureisunwritten

Oh, and one piece of advice I wish someone had told me when starting my own blog: have a newsletter sign-up from day one. Your mailing list can become your most valuable marketing tool and can be a big traffic driver. I didn't have one in the beginning and am kicking myself it took me so long to implement one.

Bella Sebastian

I agree with Jacquilynne. Just ask. Do not come anywhere close to the verbosity you've employed here. You'll come off as pretentious and foolish. Just ask and deal with whatever happens after.

These Birds of a Feather

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