I have no confidence in myself in job interviews and it's messing up everything. sorry question is how can I find some help?

I have no confidence in my abilities, I don't think I can effectively do any job correctly, I have no work history and the little volunteer experience I do have doesn't relate to the fast food/retail jobs I try and get. I try and prepare but as soon as the interview ask me a question my mind goes blank and I forget everything. I'm soo worthless..I stutter and cry, not smile, and can't loko them in the eye. and shake and get very angry at myself..they intimidate me so much..I end up breaking down and crying. or if I get really nervous not go at all. Had 4 in-person interviews in the past 5 years and failed everyone didn't get better for me at all. I really don't see how I'm going to get employeed now. My parents are getting frustrated with me and says if I don't get a job soon their keeping me out. Don't care anymore sometimes I hope I do so I can die.. I need help. My also depression got worse because I thought I can do this on my own. And I have no money or medial insurance and my parents wont pay for me to get help. Don't know where to go or turn too. No friends, not in college, and feeling extremely alone now that I isolated myself indoors.
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