What is becoming a wedding officiant like?

Have you looked into whether the state of MN certifies officiants itself? Massachusetts allows any person to become a one-day officiant through an easy state certification process - no ordination needed. We did this with the groom's brother and it worked out great.

FF is Catholic, although not a conservative one. We want to be sure that we are not asking him/her to do anything that would conflict with his/her beliefs. The official Catholic church position is that while lay Catholics are allowed to officiate at the civil weddings of non-Catholics, they are not allowed to accept an ordination in another religion, whatever its beliefs, to do so, or indeed for any other reason. Whether your friend would feel compelled by that I have no idea - most American Catholics don't feel bound to follow all of the church's rules - but it's something to bear in mind when you have the discussion with him.

The reason we didn't do this in North Carolina eight years ago is because marriages performed by these sorts of demi-religious organization are of questionable legality and we didn't want to mess with it. Be sure that Minnesota unambiguously accepts online ordination.

I have officiated four weddings as an ordained minister in http://www.themonastery.org/ordination?gclid=CPe3ldmb97QCFcuZ4Aod_3AACA. All of my ceremonies have been in Massachusetts and Connecticut, so I can't comment on Minnesota particulars, but prior to my first ceremony, I did order a credential card from the ULC just to have paperwork backup in case any of the relevant city clerks asked for it. Nobody has asked for verification. to answer your questions: 1. To my knowledge, I am not publically Googlable at all and my ordainment with the ULC has not compromised that. I've been an ordained minister for 13 years and have never received spam or other email from them. The ULC does have a minister registry, but it's totally opt-in. 2. I am/was a Catholic. I was ordained into the ULC without prior consent ... well that sounds a bit harsh ... I was ordained when a girl that I was dating signed me up during a party where I wasn't present. We were in our early 20's, it was a bit hilarious, though I was also a little weirded out by it. Still, some friends later asked us to marry them, which is when I had to decided what that meant to me and my faith. At that point, it had been such that I still believed in the notional idea of a Creator, and continued to cherish certain virtues of the Church such as mercy, service and compassion; but had grown estranged from much of its dogma. I had also maintained a fondness for ceremony and ritual, so in many ways I made peace with this prospect of doing something for my friends that shared my love for all of those awesome bits that religion had given me without having to accept the weird baggage that I wasn't hot about. The first ceremony was read off a script that the couple printed for me. Successive ceremonies were written based on a dialogue that I had with the couple, and those, I personally found to be really rewarding. So, for your friend, I'd certainly have a good talk with them about it, and just let them articulate what their stance with faith and the church are, and if they accept, what their boundaries around the ceremony might be (for me, as an example, I tend to prefer my weddings be simple and basic, and as unCatholic as possible. Convocation/greeting > blessing > vows> ring > kiss and done. I only include readings if the couple specifically want them. I won't read pages from the Bible even if mixed with other readings from the Quran or Winnie the Pooh, even to appease people who have more religiously minded relatives. Any conventions of an actual Mass like Communion or Sharing of Peace are also red lines for me -- though thankfully nobody's asked for that). Everyone's got a bit of a different stance, but I'd certainly say that Catholics, as dogmatic as we can be, can be a complicated and not straightforward lot. So certainly talk with your friend and be ok with them saying 'no', but don't be surprised if they find it to be a delightful prospect ... especially if considering their individual nuances around faith. Also, if your friend feels conflicted (especially in light of the advice given above with regards to heresy), they may want to consider having a talk with their favorite priest in a confessional booth (after all, that should be the ideal application of a confessional -- when you're thinking of a sin but haven't committed one yet)

though on re-read, if your friend considers themselves a "practicing" rather than a "lapsed" Catholic this may be a bridge too far for them and you may want to look into other ways of involving them that don't involve ordination.

The place I got my mail-order ordination from never shared my info with anyone. However, one day I walked into a meeting at work and was greeted with, "Good morning, Reverend!" Turned out another member of the committee was a friend of the couple whose wedding I'd officiated at the previous weekend. I got ribbed about that for months. No ill effects on my career, though.

FF is a professional in a somewhat public role, where people might google his/her name (think doctor, lawyer, accountant, etc). Is there any sort of official record (online or off) of being ordained through one of these sites? I worked for a judge who got ordained through one of those sites for the same reason, to perform a marriage. (In my state, judges are not empowered to marry. Anyone may officiate one wedding per calendar year, but this was to be his second. Hence, he needed to be ordained.) To my knowledge, the ordainment affected his life by allowing him to perform that wedding, period, the end. No collateral consequences. Congratulations on your engagement, and good luck with your wedding.

We had a friend officiate our wedding. I think it's important to note that it's a good solid day's work (more, if you do a rehearsal) which involves public performance. The going rate for a non-religious officiant in our area was $800/day, and while we couldn't afford to pay our friend that, we did get him a nice gift.

You want him to officiate the wedding, but does he have to marry you? You could get the official marriage done at a Justice of the Peace/Courthouse/wherever the day before, have the wedding with FF as the officiant, and go through the motions. No extra paperwork for FF, no databases to worry about.