Find solution
How do I quit my job?

The Art of Departure Or, How to Quit My Job.

  • I'm moving from one retail job to another. Which is easy, except for the mild emotional entanglement. How do I pull my hand out of the tiger's mouth? For six months, I worked at a retailer (let's call them Store A) as a cashier, among other things. While often the most mind-numbing job I've ever had the misfortune of taking on, the store's social dynamics encouraged me to establish relationships with my coworkers beyond cordiality. In fact, one of my bosses gave me an end table: she was trying to get rid of it, and I had just moved into my current apartment. She and another manager were kind enough to give me multiple rides home. The managers were EXTREMELY flexible about my taking two weeks' leave in January, with less than 2 days' notice, as a tragedy involving my father rapidly unfolded. But then I got another job at a pharmacy chain two weeks ago, called Store B. The pay is not much higher (because HR lowballed me last-minute, and I wasn't in a position to refuse), but I have 40 hours a week there. I barely got 25 at Store A, and at the time of hiring at Store B they were about to drop my hours to 18. Also, commuting to Store A would not be cost effective for me: I don't have a car, my bike is broken, and the round-trip taxi costs 2 hours of work. Any day that I chose to work at Store A could have been spent at Store B, where I'd make (a pitiful but noticeable) 75 cents more per hour. The fact that I am a member of management at Store B and still at the bottom of the totem pole at Store A is the nail in this coffin. The management team at Store A did not take news of my second job...as well as I thought they would. I was told that while they wouldn't exactly hate me for quitting if I chose to, they'd certainly feel hurt by my departure. My friends have encouraged me to view the job as disposable despite those feelings: it's retail, I don't need them for recommendations, etc. etc. But I feel guilty. Like this morning, I got an angry phone call this morning from the assistant manager. I had requested (by phone, last week) to be removed from the schedule for two weeks, so that I could adjust to my new job. Apparently, the scheduling manager (despite agreeing to my request) placed me on the schedule for this week, and they thought that I was a no-show for this morning. After I explained the apparent miscommunication, the manager snarled that I needed to "get my priorities straight." I was tempted to quit then and there, but said nothing. That phone call has made me anxious about how to approach leaving. So: 1) How do I phrase this in a way that acknowledges their previous generosity and doesn't royally piss them off further? 2) Do I go with my gut and quit in person, or does the lack of formality (retail) make a phone call acceptable? and 3) Should I offer to try to stay on until they replace me, or leave them to figure that out as I adjust to Store B? Notes: both jobs at Store A and B are completely unrelated to my career goals, but I'm leaning on semi-disposable jobs until I miraculously get one with a two-digit hourly wage. Thank you!

  • Answer:

    They are going to be pissed off because this isn't easy or convenient for them. They don't have your life or your best interests in mind. The only acknowlegement of their generosity needed is the thanks that you gave them at the time of their help to you- which was not exceptional, really- and a polite and professional demeanour. Don't let them guilt you into doing something that is not best for you. This isn't personal, it's business, and they're going to be pissed off by anything you do that isn't convenient for them, as they have already demonstrated. I would personally feel fine quitting by phone or email, but that's just me. They may act nice, but as I have learned the hard way, your employers ARE NOT your friends. Don't let them confuse you.

Ashen at Ask.Metafilter.Com Visit the source

Was this solution helpful to you?

Other answers

If they wanted you that badly, they'd treat you better and pay you more. If you've tried to be nice and accommodating but had that kindness returned with snarling, drop them like a fucking rock. Send a thank you email to whoever was nice to you if you like. Remember, the reason you only get 25 hours, low pay and few benefits is so that they can maintain maximum flexibility. They haven't invested in you, don't invest emotionally in them.

skewed

Congratulations, you're part of a http://issendai.livejournal.com/572510.html. This is how abusers work, too, which is why you feel so afraid and entangled. Rest assured that if they wanted to can you, they'd do so without regrets or hesitation. Remember that: you are disposable to them. After I explained the apparent miscommunication, the manager snarled that I needed to "get my priorities straight." I was tempted to quit then and there, but said nothing. These people are assholes and you don't owe them anything. Call them up and quit. "I've decided not to return to work. It's not working out. Hope to see you around." The worst part of quitting is always the build up. You'll feel so good once it's done.

PhoBWanKenobi

At the place where I work, we lost an extremely valued colleague earlier this year because she found something better. We haven't been able to replace her, because of weird funding issues. We all regarded her as a friend. Because we regarded her as a friend, we were all - including my boss, including the person who is now covering two people's work, including those of us who were depending on having someone in that role to get stuff done efficiently - sincerely happy for her, and pleased that she found a position that was such a great match for her. On her last day, we all got together and drank Prosecco that my boss bought, and made jokes and thanked her for everything she'd done. That's what it's like to be working with people who genuinely care about you, as opposed to entitled fuckwits who want to pressurise you into feeling like you owe them something.

Acheman

I did it. I walked in and quit. All I have to do is email them a written resignation, and then I'm officially cleared. I haven't chosen a best answer because each of you helped. Thank you again.

Ashen

but I have 40 hours a week there. I barely got 25 at Store A, and at the time of hiring at Store B they were about to drop my hours to 18. they'd certainly feel hurt by my departure. Bull. Shit. If they aren't 100% happy for you that you can do better for yourself with regard to making more money, then they don't give a shit about you aren't your friends. They're more than capable of giving you 40 hours, if they feel that strongly about it. They know it isn't personal, but they're still pulling this guilt trip crap on you? Fucking manipulators. Just call in "not coming anymore." It's just retail. What are they going to do, put something on your permanent record? (No.)

ctmf

And also, you're not "blatantly not showing" and you're not disappointing anyone. You told them not to schedule you and they didn't listen. It seems like you've really internalized a lot of self-punishing behavior.

PhoBWanKenobi

Look, the thing to never forget is if they needed to get rid of you, they would. In a heartbeat. Now I'm not saying they wouldn't feel shitty about it or that they would want to, but people in business make business decisions that effect other people all the time. You need to look at what you're doing as the same thing. It is a business decision that reflects the relationship you're already in. Your relationship has always been business - being friendly was just icing.

OrangeDrink

The good news is, you don't need Store A or a recomendation from them: you've already gotten that new job. The bad news is, Store A is doing their best to guilt-trip you into staying, even while they cut your hours. Look, if Store A really, really wanted and needed you so very much, they'd have matched what Store B is giving you. It may take a tiny bit of acting, but go to your supervisors and in a sad and regretful manner, tell them that although you LOVE working there and all your coworkers & bosses are the most wonderfulest peoples on the planet, you're thankful for the opportunities Store A has given you but you're very sorry to say you really have to move on, and here's the final date you'll be working there. Two weeks' notice is most common, but go ahead and offer just one week --- and be aware that they may say not to bother coming back tomorrow. In other words, no need for name-calling or yelling: go with class and dignity, if only for your own self-esteem.

easily confused

Honestly, giving notice is better treatment than most employees do in that position. Having been a retail manager for many, many years, I was always happy when my cashiers would show up for the day sober. Don't sweat it.

xingcat

Load more

Related Q & A:

Just Added Q & A:

Find solution

For every problem there is a solution! Proved by Solucija.

  • Got an issue and looking for advice?

  • Ask Solucija to search every corner of the Web for help.

  • Get workable solutions and helpful tips in a moment.

Just ask Solucija about an issue you face and immediately get a list of ready solutions, answers and tips from other Internet users. We always provide the most suitable and complete answer to your question at the top, along with a few good alternatives below.