A relocation drama - leaving London for NY

• Most of the questions I've read so far were made by people moving from NY to London, but I am considering the opposite, so I'd like to ask for some opinions to help me make a decision. I am a Brazilian-Italian girl, 26 and have been living in London for the past five years. During my time in London, I have made a number of friends here, travelled loads to other parts of Europe and have had a really good time. However, in 2005, the end of my four-year relationship and the impression that I had already finished 'doing the London thing' made me start considering a relocation. The company I work for has offices worldwide and one fine day, I have spotted a vacancy in NY in the internal list. It is something which marries two of my skills nicely and it would be a massive career challenge at the same time. I applied, submitted a test, had a coffee with my prospective NY employer in London, which was then followed by a phone call yesterday: I got the job. I introduced myself to my London counterpart a couple of weeks ago, in order to find out more about the routine, if she was enjoying the job and other details of the position, since she does exactly the same job I've just been offered. She said that the 'boss' doesn't have that much managerial experience and that's where the worrying bit begins. Because he doesn't have experience as a manager, some parts of the interviewing process have been somewhat skipped and I do realise this may have been my fault because I didn't ask these questions myself. Well, I really thought I'd have another stage in the interviewing process where I would be able to talk through these things. The first: they are offering a $45k/year salary, this is pretty much what I'm getting in sterling at the moment. I would expect a payrise as I am bringing a lot of experience to the table and because I have been working with that company for over a year now. There is a relocation package involved, where they would pay for the flight, accommodation for the first month, shipping of my belongings etc, but from what I've been researching, I fear I wouldn't be able to maintain a decent living with that kind of money. What do you guys think? To buy myself some time, I have asked for the formal job offer and am thinking through the options during the weekend. I am not sure of how I should approach my future manager to negotiate my salary as I never had to do such a thing. How do I go about this? At the company where I work, they encourage people to tell their line managers they are applying for another job at the second interview stage, but I wasn't quite sure of when that happened, so I found myself in a situation where I had to run and tell my manager before the NY guy told her directly he'd offered the job. She is an American herself, and did sympathise with the fact it was a big decision and that I was in need of a new challenge. She gave me lots of tips and offered to help if need be and said that I wouldn't need to fear losing my current job if I decided to not to go. I am up for the challenge, but moving is pretty damn scary. I would be leaving my friends and my closest buddies have already said things along the lines of "what would I do without you", which makes me feel like I won't be able to build such friendships anymore. Which I know is not that dramatic, but still... I have been going out with a lovely guy who wouldn't be able to join me there until next February, although he fully supports me on my decision to go. At the moment, I am not sure if I kind of settled here and am scared am not able to move anywhere, not even back to Brazil or to Italy. Scared of now being able to make friends, although I'm super sociable and extroverted, scared of not being able to find an affordable place to live! Perhaps this is just paranoia and I just need a kick in the bum? : ) I will probably have to face the big decision again on Monday or Tuesday, so any suggestions or comments on this situation would be much appreciated! Thank you

• Answer:

  If you've been in London for four years, you can get Indefinite Leave to Remain. Although my employer at the time didn't tell me, the bank had lots of ex-pats working in London and we all stuck together. I got mine in about two months back in 2001 without my employer even knowing. Indefinite Leave to Remain - for all intents and purposes, a UK "Green Card" - would give you the added benefit of being able to return to England to live at a later date without employer sponsorship. At least one caveat - you can't remain outside the UK for more than two years, but there are work arounds; a colleague in New York takes three weeks leave a year in London. You can probably get this document pretty quickly, but consult a professional for all of the ins and outs. Your current employer needn't know. In terms of your salary, now is the to speak up and put your concerns on record. Speaking as a ex-pat who started working for a bank in New York, then moved to Frankfurt and finally London for the same institution. I'd be a little concerned about the straight "pounds to dollars" calculation. YOU are doing THEM a favour by moving. You've every right to expect an increase in compensation. Get some standardised HR data detailing cost of living in both cities. Use this as part of your argument for more cash. I suspect London is more expensive than New York across the board but flat rental may be more costly. So you'll need some details on the various components of the cost of living in both cities. If housing is indeed more expensive, this will be part of your argument for increased compensation, the other, of course, the level of commitment you are demonstrating to the firm by relocating, the expertise you bring to the table, your increased value to the firm, etc. Also, in the rush to go many folks forget about taxes; if they haven't already, have them retain a firm to evaluate - in writing - your situation in both countries. Does your package mention tax equalisation at all? I had this, and it's essentially an agreement that you tax burden in New York won't exceed what you previously paid in London. Don't be fooled by straightforward nominal rates either; ex-pat taxes are fairly complicated and to suss this out you'll need a professionals expertise. There is absolutely no reason to make an expensive mistake here in the rush to get to New York. Other things - one first month free housing is sorta light in the grand scheme of these things, not even considering the difficulty of getting a place in New York. In both London and Frankfurt I got a "flexible" 90 days; ask for that. Will they help you find a flat, and perhaps co-sign? Your selection may be sharply limited as your US credit history will be non-existent. More than likely, you'll need some help here. The package seems to not mention home leave; you've been here five years. You've got roots. Ask for at least an annual trip back to England, at their expense. You can visit your boyfriend in three months to soften that blow a little. Have you ever been to New York? If not I'd suggest working there for a month before definitively accepting the position. You can never tell about these things, you might just hate the place. And that month will give you a leg up to focus your flat search; you'll be able to visit various neighbourhoods and see if one strikes your fancy. That's about all I can think of except try to slow down and not rush into this thing. Best of luck!!