Help me deal with a difficult business partner

I'll email him and say, let's talk this afternoon about xyz. And then he'll call me right away, because he knows I'm online. If I don't answer the phone, he gets upset. He wants to talk for hours about his ideas, and I can't get any work done (for school, which I still attend) or on this project. I don't think talking to M generally, as you have done, is working because of the cultural differences you touched on above. I would make some concrete boundaries and ask M to respect them. For instance, let him know that you are available between such and such hours, and other hours are by appointment. If the two of you need to talk about xyz, it has to wait until those times. Dedicate a separate phone line, if you need to, just to work calls, and don't answer it unless you are prepared to spend the time that M appears to need to go over everything with you. You do know, though, that starting a business requires the kind of zealous behavior he's exhibiting, though, right? In the first few weeks, especially, it will be incredibly time-intensive and demanding on everyone involved. You have to be willing to put in the hours to get the business off the ground. I'm afraid that he will push me out of the company as this new person gets more involved. I'm also thinking it might be perfect to put them together and then leave the business. As far as the third partner pushing you out, your post says this is an old friend of yours. If you are upfront with him, can he be trusted not to try to take over your role? Consider that if you cannot trust your "old friend", you really should not be doing business with him in the first place. And make it clear to M that you are around to stay and that old friend coming on will help cut down on some of your workload, as right now you have grad school and other projects weighing down on you, but in the future you will be able to give more to this business--unless this is not the case and you don't see a time when your responsibilities will be as demanding, in which case you really should make a choice between grad school or the business. I think, based on the trouble you are having with M, it's pretty clear that if it comes down to a choice, you should stay with grad school.

Being around him is emotionally demanding. I'll email him and say, let's talk this afternoon about xyz. And then he'll call me right away, because he knows I'm online. If I don't answer the phone, he gets upset. He wants to talk for hours about his ideas, and I can't get any work done (for school, which I still attend) or on this project. If you're going to run a business with this guy, you have to be able to be candid with him.

Yes been there. Take your experience, your technology and jump. Be prepared to get a good lawyer to handle the dissolution. Lawyer. Lawyer. Lawyer You're right, he will cut you out. Don't throw your friend under the bus here, either. M. Has no loyalty. Lawyer to extricate cleanly. Time to bounce.

Finish grad school. Likely you're not thinking straight from the stress. Finish this important personal goal.

Get out before you spend any more money or lose any more of your sanity. Take jbenben's advice - lawyer up if you have contributed anything to the company besides time and money.

Yes, extricate as soon as possible. You're being treated with disrespect. Not worth it, life's too short, etc.

I'm a near-founder in a tech startup right now, and I credit the good relationships we all have with each other with being one of, if not the, key elements that's made us successful so far. A bad relationship won't improve in a business setting. You're starting with a rotten core if you can't get along with this guy. Either extricate yourself now, or do the following: 1. Start being incredibly direct with him and as non-negotiable as he is. "you can work at this conference, right?" "No." "Why not?" "Because I'll be at the conference, in conference mode, doing conference things." Act like he's stupid to even question this. Some people simply try to get away with as much as possible. Stop letting him get away with anything. Don't apologize. Basically, start treating him the way he treats you, not the way you want to be treated. 2. Figure out what you own in the business and can protect if he screws you, and start protecting it. A lawyer will help with this. 3. Prepare to burn it all down if he screws you. Be ready to threaten lawsuits by having all the information from 2. Be ready to pull the plug on the enterprise if he keeps trying to steamroll you. Know that salesmen are a dime-a-dozen. A fast talking huckster is a valuable addition to any enterprise at the beginning, but they're not hard to find, and any one huckster in particular is replaceable. Either way, finish grad school. It sounds like you got sucked in by a manipulator, and the only way to deal with people like that is forcefully and with no subtlety whatsoever. In the end, you'll probably pursue another idea in another business, and realize that no one idea is very valuable, it's the execution of the idea by building the business around it that matters. And you'll thank this person for teaching you that sometimes you need to play hardball. Going through an experience like this is like learning martial arts: knowing it means you rarely need to use it.

Sunk costs. Move on. Much like having a child, running a business is much, much harder if you're doing it with someone you can't get along with.

Get out! You've seen his true colors. Is this really a person you want to be stuck dealing with for - potentially - the next 20 years? If he's causing you this much stress now, it will only get worse.