How can I get photos from one of my wedding photographers?

Ugh, I'm sorry. My sister-in-law was put into this position once, too. She even had a contract (loose one, but at least it existed). What finally worked for her was she got in contact with an acquaintance of the photographer and this person physically went to the person's house, got on their computer and burned the photos to a disk. The photographer was OK with this, but I think that she got psychologically painted herself into a corner by wanting the photos to be perfect, wanting to post process all of them and then not having the time to do it to her satisfaction because of life issues. And for that reason, she felt ashamed and stopped responding to my sister-in-law and really just hoped the problem would go away. It finally took someone to go over there and take care of it for her. Perhaps your photographer feels the same way, especially if they have a tremendous reputation to live up to? I wish you the best of luck and hope it works out.

FWIW I don't think he's trying to make this into a guessing game. The mention of the online community was to reinforce that this wasn't done through business channels, or wedding planner, or friend-of-a-friend or whatever. You know the photographer's name - can you google to find his place of work/school now and contact the photographer that way? Or, do you have other mutual friends in the community that can point you to a "better email address" or phone number? If you couch it that way -- "trying to get in touch with x, they took some photos of my wedding and I'd like to have them" then it's not really about you crossing too many social boundaries. I'd also follow up with the offer to send the thumbdrive, fed-ex box, AND give the photographer an 'out' if the files were irretrievably lost, to let you know -- then you're not out there wondering. Good luck - must be frustrating.

On second thought -- yeah, the photog is probably way in over their head and now that it's taken so long, they think they should be PERFECT if they're going to send them out. Basically it's like a mental block to them even dealing with it. Maybe send a final letter: - I know you don't want to deal with this anymore, I don't either! But I really want the photos - do you still have them? if not, just tell me so I don't have to keep worrying and bugging you - I know you think there is too much to do on them, but believe me, I just want the photos - we won't put them online with your name on them IF you don't want - no more post-processing needed - just shove them onto a DVD and send off - supply your address and I will send a pre-paid fed-ex box to make this simple - I know it's now just this thing you don't want to touch, but we paid for the service of just the photographs - please just send us that end of the bargain and it'll be OFF YOUR PLATE! - maybe a line about not wanting to take this further Again, good luck! I'm sure they would make a nice 3rd anniversary present.

If he has a reputation for taking great candids (without being a full-time professional with workflow systems, higher ratio of good-to-bad raw shots, etc.), he probably spends an enormous amount of time post-processing his files (cropping, color balance, the works)-- and most photographers share the disease of perfectionism. Someone like this could be easily spending two hours on post-processing 25 amazing shots from a meetup-- and find themselves overwhelmed at the prosepect of trying to maintain the same high standards for post-processing 200-400 wedding shots. You can ask him to burn the files as is and pass them along (which he probably won't do, in order to preserve his reputation, and due to his own standards-- no one wants crap images floating around under their name when they've been called "amazing" in the past)....or you can tell him to just pick 25-50 of his favorites, and call it a day. I wish you weren't being so coy about what you paid and for how many images; if his time is averaging out to $2/hour given the shots he's expecting to deliver (your expectations or his), I don't think it's unreasonable to either revise the number of images you'd like from him, or offer to pay him extra. He should have had someone mentoring him through what to charge for his time and how.

I'm guessing they are in over their head. I'm a photographer, I don't shoot weddings on a regular basis, but occasionally I do if a friend begs me. The first time I shot a wedding my realization afterward was: "dear god this is a lot of work and files to process, I should have charged triple what I agreed to!" Doing a wedding is more work than shooting an ad campaign, pays less, is more stressful because you don't have any control over anything, and the clients (no offense meant here) don't generally know anything about photography and you have to deal with them and their expectations which is an important part of doing that kind of work. If this person is an amateur (or even a pro who just doesn't normally shoot weddings), no matter how "good" they are, they are probably just in way, way over their head. People who shoot weddings all the time have really refined workflows and ways of working and speaking from experience, if you're not using to doing it it's overwhelming. I don't know what the solution to your problem is since you don't have a contract, but I have a feeling that is the problem on their end.

Maybe something happened and he lost all the files? I can't imagine why he'd be hoarding RAW files if he's already been paid for his work. You could also go to small claims to get your money back. Not ideal, I know. (Though, without a proper contract it might be tricky?)

I would write a really heartfelt letter. Dear photoguy, I'm so frustrated. I paid you to do the work, and I have every confidence that the work is great, but you have not given us the wedding pictures. It's an important day, and I am incredibly disappointed. Would you please mail us a cd/dvd, upload to yousendit.com, or mail a USB key to us at [address]. I've tried hard to be patient, and I can't understand why you haven't responded. Meanwhile, I'd enlist any help I could find to get the real life address, and follow up the email with a letter from a lawyer. It can be any lawyer with letterhead. Dear Photoguy, You were paid x amount to produce x work, and have not provided the work. etc. It's a pretty standard thing. After that, maybe you could hire someone to go to the address to ask for the photos. It's possible he accidentally deleted them, lost the files, or is otherwise unable to produce the work. This is really bad behavior on his part.

Supplying the fed-ex box and media isn't really about the funds (in my mind). It's another level of urgency and step-by-step process. And reinforcing the whole - no more work, just throw the DVD in the box! And it might be a good "first step" to ask the photographer to agree to -- OK, post-processing and finding photos and putting in a box, and apologizing. Just too overwhelming/guilt-laden at this point. But sure, responding with an address - that is an easier firs step to agree to. Then the box arrives, then it's SITTING on their desk, a big reminder/instigator.

Thanks for the clarification-- sounds like you've handled this well and your expectations were reasonable. This is a great idea that I will suggest, but I suspect it would only be a good solution if the problem is a lack of funds to purchase and mail the media. I think your instinct is correct on this-- he's not dragging his heels because he lacks $15 or whatever in DVD+postage. I'd go ahead and, as I mentioned above, offer to accept less images (give him a number)-- and then I'd do what others have suggested and find someone who knows him and can contact him about it. It sounds like he may be depressed, overwhelmed, etc. and needs pressure on this from a more immediate presense in his life (maybe even someone who will come over and burn the images themselves, as another poster has mentioned).