Help me find easy tactical RPGs!

It's not an RPG, but something like Advance Wars (I recommend Days of Ruin over Dual Strike) may show you the joy in winning fights with careful positioning of your guys. If you have a PC (or Mac), the original Fallout is a fantastic RPG that happens to have fairly intuitive tactical combat that's not as busy as FF Tactics or Disgaea.

I would strongly recommend not going with any Disgaea game - they are designed to appeal to hardcore fans, and so feature very long playing times and lots of level grinding. Two tactical RPGs I would recommend are Valkyria Chronicles for the PS3 and Zone of the Enders: The Fist of Mars for the GBA (although it looks like you don't own either of those platforms unfortunately). Both are easy to grasp and are fairly forgiving difficulty wise.

My first tactical RPG was Shining Force on Sega. It was very basic. A very straight forward story line with very few opportunities to stray and completely set characters. I can't stand all the customizable options and story-less extra characters that come with the newer tactical RPG games. Unfortunately the Sega isn't on your list... but, if you have a PC it's not too hard to find an emulator to give Shining Force a try. If you decide to give FFT another try or other more complex games, I'd suggest going down the path of less customizing. Once you fill up all the slots on your team just keep using the same people over and over. Don't attempt side quests. Once you decide on a profession for your characters just stick with it, don't switch it up. Go for the most basic you can go for and hopefully the game will be more enjoyable.

Fire Emblem was just released for the DS. It strips out a lot of the unnecessary level grinding / job selection of FFT-type games. There's only two "systems" to know. I had the previous two GBA versions, and they do very well in reducing the RPG clutter.

I'm not sure how feel about playing flash games, but http://armorgames.com/play/505/sonny and http://armorgames.com/play/2900/sonny-2 are simple fun.

Be aware that in Fire Emblem games, if a character dies, they are dead. Forever. No reviving. That can be very frustrating even for an experienced SRPG player. I really think Advance Wars is a good place to cut your teeth, and there are two available for the DS(Dual Strike and Days of Ruin). I've only played Dual Strike, but it did a good job of keeping the learning curve manageable and explaining the game elements so that even though it is somewhat complex, it's not overwhelming.

I love Tactical RPG's too, and I couldn't come up with any easy ones. This is a genre full of difficult games. I thought the original Final Fantasy Tactics was especially hard. I played it when it came out, and I played it again last year, still pretty hard. Possible recommendations: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Front_Mission_4. I really liked this one, and I don't think it was too hard. It's mechs instead of fantasy, which is a nice change of pace. Looks like the http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Front_Mission_(video_game) is out for the DS now. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Final_Fantasy_Tactics_Advance was fantastic, but only on the GBA. The http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Final_Fantasy_Tactics_A2 was made for the DS, and is almost certainly worth your time. Also, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/La_Pucelle:_Tactics was supposed to be good, but I never played it. It's made by the same people as Disgaea.

Suikoden 2 is a JRPG for PS1 with a tactics sub-game. It's 90% standard RPG (correction: awesome standard RPG!), 10% tactics, and not overwhelmingly hard. Fair warning, though: you'll probably have to emulate it, http://catalog.ebay.com/Suikoden-II_083717170426_W0QQ_fifptsZ1QQ_pcatidZ2QQ_pidZ1436QQ_trksidZp3286Q2ec0Q2em271.

It's already been mentioned, but I would very highly recommend http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Disgaea:_Hour_of_Darkness (the original to start, as there are now three in http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Disgaea_(series)). Play the PS2 version if possible - though it's been ported to DS, the controls are a bit clumsier there. It's a great overall game, and although it's true that you CAN get very complex if you choose, you can also just go through and complete the game without really delving into it particularly deeply. If you check out Disgaea and like it, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nippon_ichi has a whole slew of RPGs on PS2 that are worth checking out. Some are more traditional (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atelier_Iris:_Eternal_Mana, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mana_Khemia:_Alchemists_of_Al-Revis) than strategy (all three Disgaea games, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/La_Pucelle:_Tactics, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Makai_Kingdom), but all have a great sense of humor and a decent storyline. On DS, I would recommend checking out http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Final_Fantasy_Tactics_A2:_Grimoire_of_the_Rift, though I will say that the battles tend to be on the slow side. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Luminous_Arc is fun as well, and though I haven't played them extensively, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rondo_of_Swords and http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Summon_Night:_Twin_Age may be closer to some 'starter' games in the genre. There's a massive list of tactical RPGs, in chronological order, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chronology_of_tactical_role-playing_video_games.