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How can I get physical custody of my daughter?

My 2.5 Year old Daughter is scared of my physical contact, I recently gained custody over her 2 weeks ago, how can i get her to feel comfy?

  • A bit of background on my situation. Me, 32 Year old American man living in Japan, work at home, single. 2 year relationship with a Japanese woman. Unexpected pregnancy. 2 Weeks after birth mother left to China , said too young for motherhood i asked for child was denied by mother. Left the child with grandma. 2 weeks ago after a 2 year custody dispute w/ grandmother I won. Grandmother ordered to stay at my house for 2 weeks to acclimate my daughter. She is now 2.4 yrs and its me, a nanny (native Japanese speaking woman who she enjoys and trusts) and a neighbors child playmate girl of similar age. ).. She enjoys playing toys with me at a arms distance but is very afraid of physical contact, and will not allow me to hold her. Nanny asks her in Japanese, why no daddy? she says she’s “scared”, why, "daddy is nice", her reply “no” -- "why no"? .. no reply. How can I correct this? Could the gmother have say bad things about me? Can I repair the damage? Greatly appreciate your help. Thank u

  • Answer:

    She will just need time to adapt to you. You show her your love and she will turn around eventually. It is quite possible that mom and/or grandma said bad things about you to try to prevent her from being with you. Sad but.... Thats how things go. Be patient. It will turn around. Best of luck to you.

edpeck at Ask.com old Visit the source

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to me...it sounds like the child could have been told things by the grandmother OR if she had very little contact by you over this time could play into it as well. As with any child that age they need to feel safe and be able to trust you. Give yourself some time to get to know your daughter. Not only tough on you, but probably more so on her because she is so young and doesn't really understand whats going on. She will come around, you just have to have patience w/her...you may want to try to let her come to you also (and she will).

Anynomous

Nothing can fix it but Love. Be kind , patient, loving, let her know she can depend on you. When she has others to depend on she may take longer to relating to you. You may not know what others have done to her, it could be bad, hope not, but you never know.

splitpea

It take time take her out for ice cream , to the park and just have fun

victoria_lady

Has anything bad with"physical contact" ever happened to her? But other than that have fun with her

boss302x

She really needs time. You are a stranger and you want to hold her and she is at the age where she's scared to go to unfamiliar people. Play games tease her in a fun way, stay on her level lay on floor build things and build trust at the same time. Dont force it ! laugh, sing, be silly. She will warm up. Don't be too serious we are all more comfortable with people who laugh and act silly. Reach for her hand to put her to bed at night and walk with her to bed. Dont let nanny do parent things, you do them, best of luck

jojo2430

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