How do you get people to take you seriously?

How can I get people to take me more seriously in a professional capacity?

• I'm cursed - some say blessed but I definitely don't - with a baby face and a voice that is not particularly commanding. Strangers often guess my age at around 22, but I will be 29 soon. I have often felt that I have been passed over for promotions because people view me as some fresh-faced kid out of college. It frustrates me. My bald, bearded friend who is the same age was promoted in half the time despite having a poorer work performance. My reviews are always excellent and I am considered hugely important to my department, but they just won't give me any kind of responsibility. Outside clients also tend to look past me and assume I am some kind of assistant.   My current boss us really nice and fought on my behalf to get me a pay rise, but I've still gone nowhere in the year and a half I've been in this job. I've seen outsiders recruited above me and other people rising quickly. Day to day I don't let this get to me. I just knuckle under and get on with the best job I can and do it well. This is recognised, but just not rewarded. How can I overcome this prejudice?

• Answer:

  There are two approaches to this problem that I can think of. The chances are you have even more options. So, you aren’t cursed. You just have to shift your attitude to succeed in this game.   The first approach is to emanate enthusiasm and energy. In my professional life, I’ve worked with someone just like you have described yourself. However, he didn’t seem to be bothered at all. He was older than us and more senior than us. However, he projected that youthfulness, energy, and enthusiasm about his job. Although we didn’t feel being commanded by him, we used to look up to him for advice. His energy and enthusiasm about his job easily engaged everybody around him. I’m glad I had the chance to work with him and learned quite a lot during the short time we’ve worked together. If you want an example to what I’m writing here, go to YouTube and watch a video by Brendon Burchard. He doesn’t look and behave like the ultimate commanding authority, but his enthusiasm and energy easily engages you.   The second approach is to work on your physical appearance to project more authority. Does Matt Damon look like a tough CIA agent? Hardly so, but he has played that role in the Bourne series. And he keeps playing similar though guy roles successfully. You can definitely train your voice to have a deeper voice. You can train your posture to project more authority. You can dress more professionally. Sure, there is more to this than just the physical appearance. Your mental attitude plays a huge role in this as well. You won’t be able to change all of this overnight. It will take time, but if you want to succeed, you have to stick with it, no matter how many times you fail at it. Keep failing until you succeed.   You sound like you’ve already accepted the victim role. If the bald, bearded guy gets the promotions just because the way he looks, so what? That’s life. You have a challenge here and you are the one who has to deal with it. Love the challenge and work on it. If you do, you’ll learn a lot of valuable lessons that you can apply for the rest of your life. Those lessons have the potential to bring you much further than your friend who’s promoted just for his looks. Remember, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger,” as Nietzsche said. Think about it as weight training that’ll make you stronger for more important matches in the future.